HappyPanda Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Do you snoop on your significant others emails, phones, what have you? My boyfriend gave me his email password, and said something jokingly like "dont worry, you can go ahead and snoop on me " To be honest, I didnt even think to do that! Ive never been a snooper... although I know its a pretty common behavior. For those that will admit to doing it, is it only if you think there's some sort of betrayal? Or will you snoop simply to keep tabs? And if you yourself are a snooper... would you be mad if you knew you were being snooped on?
D-Lish Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I've never snooped, I never would. If I get to that point where I feel the need to snoop the relationship is over.
vsmini Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I snooped with my ex. It was a very unhealthy relationship and I myself was a very immature person with an unhealthy mentality towards men and relationships. I never found out anything on him by snooping and it became a sort of obsession. It made me feel the lowest of the low when I finally came to and realized how terrible it was. Now I'm in a relationship where I do not snoop and never plan on doing it again.
zlatnapolja Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Yea dont snoop it can ruin your relationship, more than you could possibly realize, you could develope a habbit of becomming suspicious. And if a guy GIVES you his pasword, than it ussualy means there really isnt anything to be worried about;)
Woggle Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I did once and in no way am I proud of it. I will never do it again.
allina Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Nope, never will. If you need to snoop you're in the wrong relationship.
cerridwen Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I was mid-snoop and stopped. At that moment, I realized my relationship blew and was over. And yes, I wanted to snoop because he was shady.
collegeguy_24 Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I snopped once in my very first relationship. Thats when I realized she was cheating on me. I am glad I did snoop cause it helped me to avoid a problem that would only have gotten worse.
smudge21 Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Yes, done it and it always leads to something bad. Basically if you're snooping then it's down to lack of trust; no trust means there's something wrong; something wrong always leads to further problems and usually the end of the relationship. So the moment you're tempted to snoop should be the moment you talk to your other half. Unfortunately thanks to the internet and social networking sites, it's so easy now to find out about partners. The temptation is often too strong. I've Googled my ex in the past and that was a major mistake. Hopefully one I've learnt from.
Star Gazer Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I snooped after the relationship ended. It made me get over the heartbreak a lot easier, seeing what he was saying about me and our relationship...
runner Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 My boyfriend gave me his email password, and said something jokingly like "dont worry, you can go ahead and snoop on me " hmm, this seems a bit odd. as if he wants you to discover something about him without actually telling you about it himself...and if it upsets you, then he can turn around and say something like, "well it's your fault for being a snoop !" to quote general Akbar, "it's a trap!"
Houndsoflove Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 it's true that if you snoop, there's a problem of trust. i snooped twice, i had gut instinct, in both instances i discovered they were secretly talking to and meeting up with their exes. normally i don't the thought of looking through anything of theirs never occurs to me.
Pianiste Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I have snooped in the past and if I feel somebody is pulling my leg like those guys were, even after we've had a good talk about it, I would do it again. They both had things going on for quite some time and I had asked them about it but they would deny it. I would never snoop around without having a very very strong suspicion. But if the suspicion is there then I'm not going to wait around for them to finally tell me, they're wasting my time.
OliveOyl Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I used to check my stbx's browser history to see how much porn he was looking at. Is that snooping? These days I would Google but I'm not into snooping. If a relationship got to the point where I thought snooping was warranted, then the relationship would pretty much be over.
zlatnapolja Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 hmm, this seems a bit odd. as if he wants you to discover something about him without actually telling you about it himself...and if it upsets you, then he can turn around and say something like, "well it's your fault for being a snoop !" to quote general Akbar, "it's a trap!" Hehe, couldn't it just be a sign of openness?
RecordProducer Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 And if you yourself are a snooper... would you be mad if you knew you were being snooped on?I snooped because I KNEW I couldn't trust him. In some ways it ruined the realtionship (marriage) because liars don't realize they are not ENTITLED to privacy when they lie (you'll get the same mentality with the fifth amendment defenders - lawyers will tell you you're entitled to having your spouse's dead body in your trunk as long as you don't break traffic rules). As many people said, if you have to snoop, the trust and the realtionship is over. But if you are not sure, I support it as a tool to figure out where you stand.
utterer of lies Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Do you snoop on your significant others emails, phones, what have you? I don't snoop. My last ex even got angry one time because I never wanted to check her phone, or ask her with whom she went to some party or whatever. I think my obvious disinterest in these things bound her much closer to me.
tigressA Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 (edited) I snooped once on my ex and twice in my current R. The first time, I found something super-shady and confronted my BF with it; he explained it and disconnected from all of it right in front of me. He was upset that I didn't trust him enough. I was right to do it in the case of my ex, but totally wrong to do it in my current R. Edit: I can't totally agree with those who say that when you snoop, you're in the wrong relationship. A partner can only do so much to make you feel secure in the relationship and appear trustworthy. In many instances (mine for example), someone is just very insecure and it's an issue they have to learn to manage to be in a happy, healthy relationship, period. Edited May 25, 2011 by tigressA
OriginalPenguin Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Edit: I can't totally agree with those who say that when you snoop, you're in the wrong relationship. A partner can only do so much to make you feel secure in the relationship and appear trustworthy. In many instances (mine for example), someone is just very insecure and it's an issue they have to learn to manage to be in a happy, healthy relationship, period. I agree with this. The temptation for me was too strong and I snooped a phone. regretted it deeply because it really hurt her, the signal that was sent was "You don't trust me". Turned out there was nothing she was hiding but it did end up opening the doors for better communication. It's a mixed bag but personally I never want to do that again.
ASG Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I've never snooped. Once I was at my ex's and wanted to check my emails and opened the page and he was still logged on and I didn't exactly look away and logged off immediately, but didn't go through his emails!
orion1010 Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Being on the other end where my ex fiance snooped on me, I can say it hurt. I think it was 6 months into our dating. He would stay the night and I would have to go to classes/work in the morning. He admitted to me a couple years later that he found pictures of me and my ex and threw/burned them. Some were nice pics and good memories and others were of us being kissy and he got jealous of it. It hurt because I always try to end things on a good note with my ex's and I can honeslty say that not one ex boyfriends of mine hates me and if I were to run into any of them, they would greet me with a smile and want to say hello. So for him to get rid of pictures and memories behind my back really hurt. I don't advise snooping. It hurts the person you're doing it too.
thatone Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 i'll facebook snoop a bit when first dating, but don't really consider it snooping, after all, they can look through mine too whenever they want. phones and emails, no.
Kampo Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 (edited) did once on my ex. I saw a suspicious text one night come accross her phone in glancing. confronted her about it, didn't beleave her excuse. logged into her facebook the next day when I was at work an uncoverd relations with a guy at work. we broke up shortly after. Edited May 25, 2011 by Kampo
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