DreamerGirl27 Posted May 24, 2011 Posted May 24, 2011 I had 3-4 close friends that I talked to every night on facebook and one of them included that idiot boy I was so hung up on. Well, I can't push my feelings aside for the boy and he doesn't like me like that and he constantly goes after girl after girl and he's got 200+ people on his account and most of them are girls and I'm just tired of seeing them all post on his status updates and stuff. But...now I have nobody to talk to. I talked to him the most and he's been the person I've been talking to the most for the past year and a half. I met him 2 years ago, started talking a year and a half ago. I know this is for the best, but then apart of me wants to tell myself to suck it up and deal with the fact that he doesn't like me, just for the sake of having a friend, but I can't do that. I dunno what to do. I've already deleted him off my account and I feel stupid re-friending him, especially this soon. I know I need to not refriend him. He's kind of a...butt wipe, if ya know what I mean (didn't wanna say the other word). So, I can either have a butt for a friend or only talk to my girlfriends whenever they are on. I need someone to talk to, but not at the expense of my heart. Am I doing the right thing by keeping no contact? Someone, please, reassure me.
JohnnyBlaze Posted May 24, 2011 Posted May 24, 2011 Did you do the right thing by keeping no contact? I don't know. But I do know I'd have done the same thing, if I were in your shoes. I tend to be the kind of guy who would rather keep a few, close friends that I trust with my life than a hundred casual acquaintances. It means I have fewer people I can talk to, but I know I can talk to them about a lot more and still keep things quiet. Because of that, I may be biased in my answer. From the sounds of it, if you kept this guy in the picture, he'd just cause you more headache and heartache. No guy's worth that.
Author DreamerGirl27 Posted May 25, 2011 Author Posted May 25, 2011 Typical girl obsessing over someone who doesn't even want her then will be crying about how ALL men suck. Typical response from someone who's screen name is that of an anti-addictive medication for those with opioid dependency.
thehead Posted June 3, 2011 Posted June 3, 2011 I had 3-4 close friends that I talked to every night on facebook and one of them included that idiot boy I was so hung up on. Well, I can't push my feelings aside for the boy and he doesn't like me like that and he constantly goes after girl after girl and he's got 200+ people on his account and most of them are girls and I'm just tired of seeing them all post on his status updates and stuff. But...now I have nobody to talk to. I talked to him the most and he's been the person I've been talking to the most for the past year and a half. I met him 2 years ago, started talking a year and a half ago. I know this is for the best, but then apart of me wants to tell myself to suck it up and deal with the fact that he doesn't like me, just for the sake of having a friend, but I can't do that. I dunno what to do. I've already deleted him off my account and I feel stupid re-friending him, especially this soon. I know I need to not refriend him. He's kind of a...butt wipe, if ya know what I mean (didn't wanna say the other word). So, I can either have a butt for a friend or only talk to my girlfriends whenever they are on. I need someone to talk to, but not at the expense of my heart. Am I doing the right thing by keeping no contact? Someone, please, reassure me. DG17 do you think your home schooling contributed to your difficulty forming friendships? A girl in college had the same problem you just described. She chased after me but I was interested. She didn't socialize much with others in person because her skills were not developed. She was also home schooled. If there is awkwardness when dealing with people IRL maybe therapy or practice could help.
Author DreamerGirl27 Posted June 3, 2011 Author Posted June 3, 2011 No, my home schooling had nothing to do with it thanks. I have friends, they're just all girls and I do see these friends outside of facebook. I honestly would just prefer to spend all my time at home. Or out doing date-like stuff. Like movies, concerts, mini golfing, etc.... I have no desire to party or anything like that and if I'm gonna go anywhere I'd prefer it be work or school. I just have a hard time getting these guys to talk to me on facebook. If I were to see any one of these guys in person, they would not ignore me, because I know all of these guys in person. It's just that once I'm outta sight, apparently it's outta mind as well. Don't knock home schooling. Or my social skills. They are both fine, thanks.
Clyde_C Posted June 3, 2011 Posted June 3, 2011 As somebody who used to obsess over girls and add/block them on an emotional whim I can say it's certainly not worth it to try and keep contact with somebody who makes you upset all the time. Even if you think you are just being overly emotional and they aren't at fault, the fact remains that they cause conflict and you just aren't ready for that sort of friendship. Making friends is a huge pain for people who want actual close friends. And if you can't settle for calling acquaintances who will casually acknowledge your existence from time to time friends, it might be better to focus on yourself and getting your own life straightened out. The true friends will work their way into your life eventually. Whether you are actively seeking them or not. Your personalities will resonate and hopefully spark up a friendship. You don't have to be antisocial, but you don't want to look needy, either. The best you can do is just get out in the world and socialize with a lot of groups. People who enjoy a subject that you do. You may not find somebody tomorrow, or even in the next few years, but look at how many marriages fail. People rarely find their soulmate conveniently at a young age. It's better to have a good job and a home than it is to find a quick relationship. If you are happy, you'll start making friends without even trying.
thehead Posted June 3, 2011 Posted June 3, 2011 No, my home schooling had nothing to do with it thanks. I have friends, they're just all girls and I do see these friends outside of facebook. I honestly would just prefer to spend all my time at home. Or out doing date-like stuff. Like movies, concerts, mini golfing, etc.... I have no desire to party or anything like that and if I'm gonna go anywhere I'd prefer it be work or school. I just have a hard time getting these guys to talk to me on facebook. If I were to see any one of these guys in person, they would not ignore me, because I know all of these guys in person. It's just that once I'm outta sight, apparently it's outta mind as well. Don't knock home schooling. Or my social skills. They are both fine, thanks. Do you want some tips on how to have these guys more interested in talking to you? Instead of ignoring you?
Author DreamerGirl27 Posted June 3, 2011 Author Posted June 3, 2011 Well, it doesn't help that half these guys are guys in bands. I used to play drums and I met a lot of band guys and those types of guys rarely talk to anyone, because they have 700+ people on their accounts already. No amount of tips you could give would make my male friends with egos the size of Texas, all of sudden remember the girl they used to know IN PERSON, talk to me online. They flat out ignore me. That's why I'm so hung up on one guy. The rest of my guy friends are "too busy" for me. And have girlfriends. The only single guy friend I have isn't interested in me, why, I don't know. His reasons seem bogus to me, but oh well. Bottom line is, I only have one guy I'm talking to and that's the only guy I want, and it's not gonna change.
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