Hhhh Posted May 23, 2011 Posted May 23, 2011 I'm not talking about our exes, we couldn't careless right? I'm talking about the people on page 900 on this forum, people who posted on these same walls in the year 2002. The same people who said they couldn't never get through life without him or her. The same people who begged for help during their break ups. I hope they are living happily ever after with "the one". Searching through those posts has made me realize that I probably won't even notice my ex if she walked passed me on the street after a couple of years. What I'm trying to say there is much more for us on this journey of life, and here we are obsessing about our exes. I want to encourage you lot to check those posts outs. Hope the best for everyone on these boards
Beeotch Posted May 23, 2011 Posted May 23, 2011 (edited) LOL so true. My initial post wasn't 900 pages ago, but in 2009, and I am so far over my ex, quite alarmed I even dated him, laugh or get disgusted when I think of the craziness I would think up and the wishes of a reunion (psshh). I learned quite a lot, was single and happy, liked someone else again, that ended/is ending amicably and I am in a healthier place where I KNOW that you live, love, breakup, LEARN (hopefully) and move forward. My biggest advice would be to make sure you look at yourself, look at any patterns and LEARN so that with each person you get closer to the ultimate relationship you want instead of obsessing over that person and recreating the same experiences just with a different package. Break ups are no doubt hard and there is a grieving process but having a healthy self esteem and life that is fulfilled before and during your relationship lessens the blow versus when you use other ppl to validate you and build your life around them. You will feel pain....can't escape it...and all kinds of irrational emotions but YOU WILL live to love again. Edited May 23, 2011 by Beeotch
Beeotch Posted May 24, 2011 Posted May 24, 2011 Maybe you really are over him, OR if he was the only guy with the biggest impact in your whole life, you still love him. I've seen people get back together after years, even married. It's crazy. I have an ex before him that I still love...but not in that crazy way that people act when you break up. I will always love him but I do not need to be with him and know that there is someone else out there for me. NO MAN is my last chance. None. But people go into panic mode post-breakup and act like that person is their only chance at love so they HAVE to get them back, when that is never the case. It is not impossible to reunite with an ex; however, that is not the norm and usually, from what I've seen, people reunite after moving on and living their life, loving others and then it comes back around.
Sugarkane Posted May 24, 2011 Posted May 24, 2011 I've also wondered the same thing. I wish these people could get back to us and tell us what happened afterwards.
Leda Posted May 24, 2011 Posted May 24, 2011 I hope they are living happily ever after with "the one". I know! I'm always hoping that too. I've gotten very attached to a couple of threads, and then never found out what happened in the end. I think it really skews our sample here, too. There are a couple of people with many thousands of posts who post really depressing, "tough love" things in multiple threads ("Don't listen to your ex when she emails that she loves you and misses you! It's just breadcrumbs! She doesn't love you OR miss you, she's just using you, if you had any self-esteem or balls you would just ignore her forever!") Since most of the happy, long-term couples I know in real life broke up and reconciled at one point, usually early on, I know there are a lot of happy endings. I like to think that some of those disappearing posters are living out happy endings.
Author Hhhh Posted May 27, 2011 Author Posted May 27, 2011 I know it really sucks we never get to hear the end of their story, which in most cases is like an interesting novel. But hopefully some found someone better that can treat them right, without letting go for the thought of greener grass elsewhere in the world.
b_rouse Posted May 27, 2011 Posted May 27, 2011 My break up happened in October and I was devastated. I posted on here everyday as a means of coping. Eventually I got tired feeling sad and depressed and wondering what he was up too. And eventually my heart followed my mind and, to be honest, I have NO interest in my ex anymore. Then, my ex and I decided to get lunch last week and we talked for 3 hours. It was nice catching up, but I kept wondering if those same feelings half a year ago were going to come rushing back. To my surprise, they didn't. I questioned what I originally saw in him. I can finally say I'm 100% over my ex. This just goes to show you that life continues on, even if you're sad and hurt and think you can't move forward without this person.
muzik_lvr Posted May 27, 2011 Posted May 27, 2011 I'm not talking about our exes, we couldn't careless right? I'm talking about the people on page 900 on this forum, people who posted on these same walls in the year 2002. The same people who said they couldn't never get through life without him or her. The same people who begged for help during their break ups. This is a great point. I think about this often too. I think to myself "I wonder what all the people from years ago are doing today?" And I can't help but think they are doing fine, having moved on with their life. I can finally say I'm 100% over my ex. I am glad to hear this! It's only been about 4 months since my ex broke up with me, and I can truly said time does help you heal. I probably wouldn't say I am %100 over her, but I am getting close. 2-3 years from now, I am very confident I will fully be over her (I better be lol)
victoriaaa Posted May 27, 2011 Posted May 27, 2011 I have only been posting and viewing here for a week or so, having only just split up with my ex of 6 years 2 weeks ago. But it has really helped me come to terms with things and realise there is hope, whether its with or without him. Hearing different advice and viewpoints is always reassuring. I can vent and moan and it means I feel the urge to contact me ex less.
b_rouse Posted May 27, 2011 Posted May 27, 2011 2-3 years from now, I am very confident I will fully be over her (I better be lol) Or...in 2-3 years from now you'll be with the woman of your dreams!
Peanut9330 Posted May 27, 2011 Posted May 27, 2011 Sometime after my breakup my ex had tried to get with me for a while actually a very long tedious while, however I was done and still am done with him. It took him a long time to realize that I'm not coming back. Yes at first I was devastated and wanted nothing but to get back with him. However after talking some time to look back and reflect on the relationship I realized that he was not the right person for me. I don’t even remember how long ago we broke up all I know is that I'm happy with where I am in my life and currently in a relationship with a wonderful man.
muzik_lvr Posted May 28, 2011 Posted May 28, 2011 Or...in 2-3 years from now you'll be with the woman of your dreams! That surely is the hope!
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