jules_garner Posted April 13, 2004 Posted April 13, 2004 Hi people. My head has been quite screwed up recently. I really like a friend of mine, and we've been passionately kissing each other on and off since October last year. At first it was just funny, and I thought, seeing as we were both drunk it wouldn't matter. However recently I have started to develop feelings for him. We discussed this and he said that we had better just ignore it or we'll ruin our friendship. I have tried to stop this but it seems we always end up close to each other in some way or another, and it feels natural. The last time it happened, he admitted he felt something, but said he didn't want a relationship, I don't either, but can't prevent this, and it's screwing my head over and ruining our friendship. I have been trying to ignore him, but we are good friends, and also have many mutual friends, so it is difficult, and he always comes round to see me, every day, so I am having trouble hiding my feelings. Sometimes I feel like shaking him. We act most of the time like boyfriend and girlfriend, and I know he thinks a lot about me by what he says to other people. I also know this is not just about sex, as he always stops it before it gets that far. He gets jealous when I talk to other blokes and labels them as "wankers" though I don't know what it's got to do with him. I don't know what to do, can someone advise me in some way. Men? What's going on?
Curt Posted April 13, 2004 Moderators Posted April 13, 2004 You say you both started kissing wach other passionately since October or something. My only response to that is ... well ... why? Vague boundaries that you have both set up for your "friendship", even if this is a "Friends with Benefits" situation, have probably led to this. It comes as no surprise to me that the lines between friends and lovers appears to be starting to get blurry for you. Either (or both) of you may be in denial of feelings that you have developed for each other over the course of months. Perhaps you both need to make a "hands and lips" off rule to help re-clarify your relationship. Ask yourself, "What do I really want from this relationshipright now?" Curt
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