ladyinlimbo Posted May 24, 2011 Posted May 24, 2011 This is what I was going to hit at. I've seen post after post containing the words: lawyer, expensive, draft, defamation, slander, sue. Really? C'mon, people. Just utilize a more appropriate option: Send your letter (if you choose, not sure how much of a difference that would even make in my opinion, but if it helps you feel better...) then disconnect from that entire network. This would save you lots of time/money as opposed to forging legal documents. Who encouraged her to "forge" a legal document? We were encouraging her to have a real lawyer draft up a letter (would cost next to nothing). This guy has allegedly told people that she's given him an STD and that she's the BJ Queen of the Ball Team. That's beyond foul. If word starts getting around that she has an STD and has spread it to other men, that could seriously impact her forever. Sending this boob a letter (that she sends him) is pointless. He's obviously TRYING to get a rise out of her, he no doubt KNEW that the POF Guy was going to confront her, he obviously KNEW that he'd ruin her chances with the POF guy because of the lies he'd told him.......so her sending him an angry letter is a waste of time. He'll just chuckle to himself and take pride in knowing he "got her goat" - mission accomplished. Also..........then he has PROOF that she's contacting him...........proof in writing..........so should things ever escalate and she has to go to the police or press charges for stalking/harassment, Mr Psycho can show proof that she's contacting him.............maybe even twist it around and accuse HER of sending him nasty, threatening letters. There is no point in her sending him anything........unless she wants to add to the drama. If she really wants it to stop, get a lawyer to send him a letter telling him to cease and desist.
MrNate Posted May 24, 2011 Posted May 24, 2011 Who encouraged her to "forge" a legal document? We were encouraging her to have a real lawyer draft up a letter (would cost next to nothing). This guy has allegedly told people that she's given him an STD and that she's the BJ Queen of the Ball Team. That's beyond foul. If word starts getting around that she has an STD and has spread it to other men, that could seriously impact her forever. Sending this boob a letter (that she sends him) is pointless. He's obviously TRYING to get a rise out of her, he no doubt KNEW that the POF Guy was going to confront her, he obviously KNEW that he'd ruin her chances with the POF guy because of the lies he'd told him.......so her sending him an angry letter is a waste of time. He'll just chuckle to himself and take pride in knowing he "got her goat" - mission accomplished. Also..........then he has PROOF that she's contacting him...........proof in writing..........so should things ever escalate and she has to go to the police or press charges for stalking/harassment, Mr Psycho can show proof that she's contacting him.............maybe even twist it around and accuse HER of sending him nasty, threatening letters. There is no point in her sending him anything........unless she wants to add to the drama. If she really wants it to stop, get a lawyer to send him a letter telling him to cease and desist. So what happens if he doesn't stop? Is this really worth all the work? I would just hate seeing D-Lish stress herself out trying to deal with a creep. Maybe it's just better to disconnect from all of this.
welikeincrowds Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Is it possible that he could use the letter against you, socially? "Look, I told you! She's crazy! She's even sending a lawyer after me." I wonder if he has the ego, guile, and cunning to turn this into his favor, or at least, to continue being a problem. I wonder if a confrontation would be worth it to you, as it usually isn't with attention seekers and ****-ups. I admired your reaction to the hearsay when it came from "the good twin". Although I can see the argument for it, I'm hesitant to get behind a decision to now engage him.
sanskrit Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Is it possible that he could use the letter against you, socially? "Look, I told you! She's crazy! She's even sending a lawyer after me." No, doesn't work that way.
welikeincrowds Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 No, doesn't work that way. If you wouldn't mind elaborating. My position: I think that a con and a liar will continue to con and lie. I think that his being convincing is at least possible, however remotely. I think that someone who has demonstrated being a pain in the ass for OP, whenever their paths have crossed in the past, will continue to be a pain in the ass, whenever their paths cross in the future. I am considering whether I would, in her situation, cherish that probability, cut losses, and just not bother with him altogether. I see why you suggest a letter, and I don't at all think it's an outright bad idea. I'm not completely sold on its benefits, and I wonder about its potential to backfire, in a practical sense.
Author D-Lish Posted May 25, 2011 Author Posted May 25, 2011 This is what I was going to hit at. I've seen post after post containing the words: lawyer, expensive, draft, defamation, slander, sue. Really? C'mon, people. Just utilize a more appropriate option: Send your letter (if you choose, not sure how much of a difference that would even make in my opinion, but if it helps you feel better...) then disconnect from that entire network. This would save you lots of time/money as opposed to forging legal documents. No, no, I wouldn't go the legal route, it's not worth my time. He was also insanely stalkerish- and I feel that sending him ANYTHING- from legal counsel, or from myself, is going to invite him to engage me again. I guess I really just want him to know that I know he's an ass-hole. I don't even know if it's worth THAT. I'm angry, and I'm trying not to react in a way that will cause me further distress. Who encouraged her to "forge" a legal document? We were encouraging her to have a real lawyer draft up a letter (would cost next to nothing). This guy has allegedly told people that she's given him an STD and that she's the BJ Queen of the Ball Team. That's beyond foul. If word starts getting around that she has an STD and has spread it to other men, that could seriously impact her forever. Sending this boob a letter (that she sends him) is pointless. He's obviously TRYING to get a rise out of her, he no doubt KNEW that the POF Guy was going to confront her, he obviously KNEW that he'd ruin her chances with the POF guy because of the lies he'd told him.......so her sending him an angry letter is a waste of time. He'll just chuckle to himself and take pride in knowing he "got her goat" - mission accomplished. Also..........then he has PROOF that she's contacting him...........proof in writing..........so should things ever escalate and she has to go to the police or press charges for stalking/harassment, Mr Psycho can show proof that she's contacting him.............maybe even twist it around and accuse HER of sending him nasty, threatening letters. There is no point in her sending him anything........unless she wants to add to the drama. If she really wants it to stop, get a lawyer to send him a letter telling him to cease and desist. A letter as such would cost me about $200, lol (I asked today). He's not worth it. All this crap he said was over 2 years ago- it just happened to bite me in the ass currently. If you wouldn't mind elaborating. My position: I think that a con and a liar will continue to con and lie. I think that his being convincing is at least possible, however remotely. I think that someone who has demonstrated being a pain in the ass for OP, whenever their paths have crossed in the past, will continue to be a pain in the ass, whenever their paths cross in the future. I am considering whether I would, in her situation, cherish that probability, cut losses, and just not bother with him altogether. I see why you suggest a letter, and I don't at all think it's an outright bad idea. I'm not completely sold on its benefits, and I wonder about its potential to backfire, in a practical sense. Yes, and back to the pain in the ass- this guy became a really big pain in my ass. If I send him a message telling him I know what he said- he'll see it as a way to be a part of my life again- even if it's just in a negative way. It sucks, because I want him to know he's busted- but I think that would just encourage him to think he could worm his way back into my life again. He had a really unhealthy obsession, and you don't want to poke a beast like that.
sanskrit Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 If you wouldn't mind elaborating. My position: I think that a con and a liar will continue to con and lie. I think that his being convincing is at least possible, however remotely. I think that someone who has demonstrated being a pain in the ass for OP, whenever their paths have crossed in the past, will continue to be a pain in the ass, whenever their paths cross in the future. I am considering whether I would, in her situation, cherish that probability, cut losses, and just not bother with him altogether. I see why you suggest a letter, and I don't at all think it's an outright bad idea. I'm not completely sold on its benefits, and I wonder about its potential to backfire, in a practical sense. No, doesn't work that way.
Author D-Lish Posted May 25, 2011 Author Posted May 25, 2011 No, doesn't work that way. Are you talking about a legal letter or a personal letter San? I have to tell you, this was a guy that I'd have an exchange with like this: him: What are you doing? me: out getting groceries (I wasn't, but I didn't want to deal with him). him: "No you aren't, your cars's in the driveway" Ding-Dong- he's at my door...
RecordProducer Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 (edited) IMy friends on that team had told me the guy was a jerk, but he had a twin brother that was "the good one". Fast forward many years, and it's the twin that reaches out to me on POF and we have a date! I have a couple thoughts for you, my dear D-lish. (1) There is no such thing as one twin is a jackass and the one the other one is an angel. Just... forget that, ok? I have a lot of experience with twins: been married to one, and "own" twins, too. (kids) (2) Hanging out with men is great (I do that all the time), but unless they're much younger than you, they will want to screw you and the "friendships" will backfire on you. I have gone time and time again thinking a certain male friend is 'just a friend' - they never are, it's disgusting but true. Pretty women cannot have friends: women are jealous and men want to f*ck us. (3) Yes, DO start a campaign against the creep. DO call all your friends, the guy you dated, the boys from the team, and tell them this creep is making up things against you. They will be on your side and believe you. If they don't, you can cut them off, but I guarantee you they will believe you. (4) I don't like it that the guy you're interested in cares about what Creep said about you. Even if you did give BJ to all team mates, it shouldn't bother him if he likes you. He should realize it's not true! My ex was under the influence of his family and that was the main reason why he dumped me. Let me clarify this: my ex KNEW that his family KNEW NOTHING ABOUT ME - we are not talking about info he got from them. He just didn't get their approval and was too weak to fight for me. His brother was jealous his wife was not as good as me and he and his wife started making uo things against me (they weren't even as creative as your Creep; they were saying my kids weren't listening to me, and I was a bad person ignoring their family! ). Ultimately, our marriage (his 3rd!) broke up because he was a wimp and a coward, he took steroids and couldn't have sex because of that during our entire marriage... he was just a complete loser presenting himself as a winner. My point, my sweet D-lish: get the guys who appear wonderful to you and forget anyone that starts with a bad rep with you. I hear ya, you feel bad today, but that's what creeps do to you. DO tell everyone the creep made up stories about you, then move on. Don't think the twin is good for you. If one twin is bad, he's going to ruin your relationship even if the other twin is good. One more thing, as for the legal route, you could consult with a criminal lawyer if this would constitute stalking or any civil action perhaps, but just so you know, this is NOT hearsay and anyone who tells you that knows nothing about the law. Edited May 25, 2011 by RecordProducer
JungleLover Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I don't know about a 40 year-old woman discussing some sex related rumor that is going around about her. That would just be wierd. It's just not every day that a woman in that age group goes around telling every one that she actually didn't suck the whole baseball team off a few years ago.
RecordProducer Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I don't know about a 40 year-old woman discussing some sex related rumor that is going around about her. That would just be wierd. It's just not every day that a woman in that age group goes around telling every one that she actually didn't suck the whole baseball team off a few years ago.I know that you didn't mean to be offensive, but any thought that starts with "a woman in that age group" is offensive. You're like 22 or so and you think a 40-year old woman should be dead by now of old age. Just... don't post here, ok? There are some of us who are nearing 40 and still having sex and being very much attractive. Refrain from commenting if all you can comment on is our age.
sanskrit Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Are you talking about a legal letter or a personal letter San? Almost all people have a very strong fear of the intrusion of the law into their personal affairs that outweighs their motivation to continue whatever behavior caused or is causing the prospective intrusion. Although there is a slight chance that a lawyer letter would incite a flareup of bad behavior, there is a much greater chance of terrifying him into modifying his behavior going forward. That's all I meant. But also still think that since you seem to be moving past this fairly easily, that it may be best to let it lie.
JungleLover Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I know that you didn't mean to be offensive, but any thought that starts with "a woman in that age group" is offensive. You're like 22 or so and you think a 40-year old woman should be dead by now of old age. Just... don't post here, ok? There are some of us who are nearing 40 and still having sex and being very much attractive. Refrain from commenting if all you can comment on is our age. First of all, just drop the grenade. Second of all, I am in the same age group and date women of this age group and find them just as attractive as any other. Now, pick your face off of the floor. Next, realize that you have no authority to tell me where and when I can post, Ms. President of Loveshack. Now, for those who like to jump to conclusions and let emotions obscure the points, let me slow down so that your mind can catch up. I do not expect women of "our" age group to feel the need to go around trying to clear up such a tasteless rumor in her social circle. I would expect this from much younger age groups who tend to have more social anxiety and not be as sure of themselves. Does this rewording pleases you, Ms. President?
Lovelybird Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 RP, I think you mistake the photo, Junglelover is the other one instead of the 20' young girl, , j/k
JungleLover Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 RP, I think you mistake the photo, Junglelover is the other one instead of the 20' young girl, , j/k Exactly. I am the gorilla in the pic! Lol.
Author D-Lish Posted May 25, 2011 Author Posted May 25, 2011 I have a couple thoughts for you, my dear D-lish. (1) There is no such thing as one twin is a jackass and the one the other one is an angel. Just... forget that, ok? I have a lot of experience with twins: been married to one, and "own" twins, too. (kids) (2) Hanging out with men is great (I do that all the time), but unless they're much younger than you, they will want to screw you and the "friendships" will backfire on you. I have gone time and time again thinking a certain male friend is 'just a friend' - they never are, it's disgusting but true. Pretty women cannot have friends: women are jealous and men want to f*ck us. (3) Yes, DO start a campaign against the creep. DO call all your friends, the guy you dated, the boys from the team, and tell them this creep is making up things against you. They will be on your side and believe you. If they don't, you can cut them off, but I guarantee you they will believe you. (4) I don't like it that the guy you're interested in cares about what Creep said about you. Even if you did give BJ to all team mates, it shouldn't bother him if he likes you. He should realize it's not true! My ex was under the influence of his family and that was the main reason why he dumped me. Let me clarify this: my ex KNEW that his family KNEW NOTHING ABOUT ME - we are not talking about info he got from them. He just didn't get their approval and was too weak to fight for me. His brother was jealous his wife was not as good as me and he and his wife started making uo things against me (they weren't even as creative as your Creep; they were saying my kids weren't listening to me, and I was a bad person ignoring their family! ). Ultimately, our marriage (his 3rd!) broke up because he was a wimp and a coward, he took steroids and couldn't have sex because of that during our entire marriage... he was just a complete loser presenting himself as a winner. My point, my sweet D-lish: get the guys who appear wonderful to you and forget anyone that starts with a bad rep with you. I hear ya, you feel bad today, but that's what creeps do to you. DO tell everyone the creep made up stories about you, then move on. Don't think the twin is good for you. If one twin is bad, he's going to ruin your relationship even if the other twin is good. One more thing, as for the legal route, you could consult with a criminal lawyer if this would constitute stalking or any civil action perhaps, but just so you know, this is NOT hearsay and anyone who tells you that knows nothing about the law. Thanks RP, I did learn the hard way that you can't be friends with someone that is intent on banging you, lol. I just can't believe he went to such great lengths to paint me as a horrible person. My baseball team wouldn't/doesn't believe any of what he said. I'd been playing with most of them for years- and he was at least bright enough not to try and spread any rumours among them because they would have crucified him! The team organizer is a girl I've known for over 30 years, since middle school. The people he told were outside my social circle. It was just a coincidence I happened to meet this guy on POF and get wind of what he had said about me. I went to his facebook page last night poised to send him an angry letter, but I stopped. I think I'm more trying to come to terms with the fact that someone could even think to be so malicious- and how sick it is that he built this fantasy of a relationship and break up when nothing ever happened! The only physical contact I ever had with him was when I tagged him out at second during baseball practice, lol.
FlowerGirly Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 I recently went out on a date with someone, we had one good date, and he was really gung-ho, then contact fizzled. I'll try and condense the details because it's complicated. A long time ago I had a crush on this cute guy that managed the local grocery store that I frequented. Turned out we had mutual friends I played baseball with. My friends on that team had told me the guy was a jerk, but he had a twin brother that was "the good one". Fast forward many years, and it's the twin that reaches out to me on POF and we have a date! Back to the baseball team. One of the guys on my team was over the top obsessed with me. It was flattering at first- and I hung out with him as friends for a while. I was always upfront with him that I only wanted to be friends with him and I never wavered from that. He got incredibly annoying with his persistence, constantly trying to talk me into dating him, so I had to cut off the friendship. He got stalkerish near the end- showing up at my house and work- and the last straw was him sending me a picture of his dinkle to my phone! I also got wind from others that he had said we were dating- a complete and utter lie. I haven't talked to this guy in a couple of years because he just became too creepy. I did tell my date that night that I knew his bro and this other creepy dude- and gave some details about the stalking scenario. Fast forward to my date. He knows my date through the other twin. I assumed he lost interest because he found out I had expressed his brother was hot way back when and maybe that felt weird to him knowing that. Oh well right? Nothing I can do about that. The guy I had a date with messages me on POF today and basically called me a liar and said I obviously put on a great act. WTF? This turns into a back and forth discussion and I got an earful of what my once friend turned creespter said about me to the other twin and was relayed to his brother about me. (His brother warned him not to date me because of what this creepster had told him about me). Apparantly creepy dude did tell everyone we were in a relationship- but it gets much worse. By the end of our exchange I got an earful of what this guy had told people about me way back when. Some of the things are too awful to repeat- and I'm fuming. I don't understand how someone could LIE in the manner that this guy has lied. I knew he was off balance by the way he acted with the stalking behaviour- but the stories he made up were unbelievable. (apparantly I used to give bj's to the guys on my baseball team after games in the parking lot!!!) He said this is the reason HE BROKE UP WITH ME!! I never even so much as kissed this guy and he was constructing an elaborate relationship and betrayal scenario to other people without me knowing. I ended the convo with this guy just telling him I wasn't going to defend myself against lies. How can I defend myself against such elaborate lies! I won't, I refuse to! I just can't believe that this dude from my past was so crazy. I want to send him an angry message, but it's not going to change anything. I'm actually really hurt and it's been eating away at me all day. I don't know if sending the message calling him out on his lies is the best way to go because I cut him off a long time ago. I'm fuming. What is wrong with people????? Now you know he is off balance. Why dedicate a post to him?
RecordProducer Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 I went to his facebook page last night poised to send him an angry letter, but I stopped. I think I'm more trying to come to terms with the fact that someone could even think to be so malicious- and how sick it is that he built this fantasy of a relationship and break up when nothing ever happened! The only physical contact I ever had with him was when I tagged him out at second during baseball practice, lol.OK. I know you're a very balanced, smart girl and lots more. I do encourage you though to tell anyone who you think was influenced by this creep that he made up things. I have tried that in my past and was always surprised people would suddenly act like they learned something new and turn against my attacker. Sometimes though, they would go back to the attacker's position, but that's how I knew they were the wrong people for me. Mean, too.
Author D-Lish Posted May 27, 2011 Author Posted May 27, 2011 OK. I know you're a very balanced, smart girl and lots more. I do encourage you though to tell anyone who you think was influenced by this creep that he made up things. I have tried that in my past and was always surprised people would suddenly act like they learned something new and turn against my attacker. Sometimes though, they would go back to the attacker's position, but that's how I knew they were the wrong people for me. Mean, too. Thanks:) I guess I did that by telling pof guy my side of the story- he's really the only one that I sort of know- but still probably won't run into again now that I've closed the chapter on him. I don't know anyone else he told besides his little circle of friends that I don't know. He intentionally kept his rumour spreading to people he knew I'd never have occasion to speak to. He just never anticipated I'd happen to have a chance meeting with his co-workers brother! My biggest hope is that karma comes back and hits him with a mighty whack where it hurts most. My friends husband (from my baseball team) offered to beat the crap out of him. It just sucks to know there are people out there with this much bitterness that they'd go to such great lengths to harm someone with such lies. He's going to find out I know- no doubt about that. It sucks because pof date admitted that this guy had stalking tendancies with other women in the past- but still chose to believe what he heard. I think by the end of our conversation that he had some major second thoughts- but that was too little, too late for me.
daphne Posted May 27, 2011 Posted May 27, 2011 D- I'm sorry you had to go through this. I went through it myself and I opted not to get involved in the drama, because I hate fighting with psychos. They thrive on the drama and it makes me really uncomfortable. The guy that did it to me was on my tennis team. He spread a few silly sexual rumors about me too and implied we had dated, but fortunately most people he told them to that knew me a little bit knew it was a pipe dream so I didn't really suffer from people being stupid enough to not know he was a liar. The girl he did it to after me opted to confront him in an email format and CC'ed everyone on the tennis team and I can't fault her a bit for standing up for herself and embarrassing and humiliating him and his psychotic behavior. He left the team with his tail between his legs and even tried to gain sympathy from me about it. I laughed. Perhaps if I had taken her route and outed him (his pages long emails were fodder for psychiatric manuals), she wouldn't have had to go through what I did. I agree with Eddie and RP; it's really too risky to try to be friends with a guy who's really into you. I have learned, the hard way, that there are some unbalanced guys out there that will try to make you miserable for not giving them what they want. And yeah, unless the woman is very confident and or attractive, it can be tough being friends with women. Glad you're not entertaining the thought of legal action. For me, I find it better to take the high road and not engage. It's more soothing on the nerves and if people believe outlandish lies without considering the source, it's better to be rid of them anyway.
Author D-Lish Posted May 27, 2011 Author Posted May 27, 2011 D- I'm sorry you had to go through this. I went through it myself and I opted not to get involved in the drama, because I hate fighting with psychos. They thrive on the drama and it makes me really uncomfortable. The guy that did it to me was on my tennis team. He spread a few silly sexual rumors about me too and implied we had dated, but fortunately most people he told them to that knew me a little bit knew it was a pipe dream so I didn't really suffer from people being stupid enough to not know he was a liar. The girl he did it to after me opted to confront him in an email format and CC'ed everyone on the tennis team and I can't fault her a bit for standing up for herself and embarrassing and humiliating him and his psychotic behavior. He left the team with his tail between his legs and even tried to gain sympathy from me about it. I laughed. Perhaps if I had taken her route and outed him (his pages long emails were fodder for psychiatric manuals), she wouldn't have had to go through what I did. I agree with Eddie and RP; it's really too risky to try to be friends with a guy who's really into you. I have learned, the hard way, that there are some unbalanced guys out there that will try to make you miserable for not giving them what they want. And yeah, unless the woman is very confident and or attractive, it can be tough being friends with women. Glad you're not entertaining the thought of legal action. For me, I find it better to take the high road and not engage. It's more soothing on the nerves and if people believe outlandish lies without considering the source, it's better to be rid of them anyway. Thanks Daphne, I truly did learn the hard way about being friends with someone that wants more than a friendship. I admit to be flattered at first- but when I started glimpsing some of the "crazy"... it disturbed me. It actually makes me feel better to hear stories from people that have experienced an assault from an unbalanced character. One of the biggest things I had to argue with the pof guy was that he didn't believe someone could make all that up to the extent they did. He consented people might embellish- but that left some half truths in the mix... It's hard to fight that kind of fire. I could go off on a rampage and cause so much trouble for this guy- but it's so much energy to waste on such a piece of ****. I could dredge up emails he had sent while with his current gf saying some really crappy stuff about her, not to mention declaring his love for me ... What would that do? Make another poor girl feel really bad. I don't want to be a party to that.
donnamaybe Posted May 27, 2011 Posted May 27, 2011 Better to leave the new girlfriend in the dark so she won't know what kind of psycho she's dealing with. lol It's quite the dilemma, isn't it? No matter which way you go, you could do more harm than good. I'm really sorry you have to deal with this.
Author D-Lish Posted May 27, 2011 Author Posted May 27, 2011 Better to leave the new girlfriend in the dark so she won't know what kind of psycho she's dealing with. lol It's quite the dilemma, isn't it? No matter which way you go, you could do more harm than good. I'm really sorry you have to deal with this. Thanks Donna, I guess the one good thing is that in leaving my date from pof behind, I have little to worry about with the rumours in the future in terms of running into mutual acquaintances. I'd still like to rip his head off, but I don't think it would accomplish much besides inviting him into my life again, and the opportunity for him to create more drama.
dispatch3d Posted May 27, 2011 Posted May 27, 2011 Obviously leave the retard alone. Who would want to initiate contact with someone like that is beyond me. He's probably looking for a reaction just so you talk to him again.
Tybalt Posted May 28, 2011 Posted May 28, 2011 From personal experience, the best way to deal with a sociopath/personality disordered person (who by definition does not have restraints on behavior due to morality or integrity, and who cannot understand/empathize with the impact that their actions have on others), is not to engage. They will never follow the rules if they can get away with breaking them. And they usually believe they can get away with it. Nothing you do will change them, your participation merely adds to the sport. Since it doesn't sound like his spewage is going to be a huge liability in your life or damage it significantly, I'd move on and go radio silence. The important people know better. In time, he will show his true colors to those who buy into his facade, as will you. Guess which one of you is going to be living a real life with real intimacy and people who are true friends? He doesn't operate in the same world you do, nor does he recognize the same rules of conduct. It's natural to feel angry, but if he really is a psychopath he can't be defined in a normal behavioral context. In that sense, he can't be held to the same standards you hold others to. I found that really grasping this concept helped me feel less angry. It is like getting upset when a table lamp doesn't get up and run a 4 minute mile.
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