XMizer Posted May 20, 2011 Posted May 20, 2011 So I have this ex-girlfriend and I am convinced she has no conscience. I have been trying to get over for quite a while but the very thought of her pisses me off. She's a popular girl with lots of friends. On the outside she's pretty and sweet but inside she's evil and pure scum. What really gets to me is that people don't know the real her but a facade of her and sometimes I have a strong urge to tell everybody the truth about her but so far, I have resisted that temptation. There are several reasons why I think she's incapable of feeling remorse. A week after we broke up, she slept with another guy and started going out with him. I confronted her about this a few months later from a friend. She called me to apologize and she said she did something so terrible that she deserves to be struck by lightning. Afterwards, she asked me who I heard it from. I refuse to betray the trust of my friend, so I didn't tell her. She soon started to get upset and said she doesn't regret what she did to me. She proceeded to say the only thing she regret is that the information ended up circling into my hands. Then she tried to make me feel guilty for everything by accusing me of favoring the friend over her. Recently I found out she broke up with her boyfriend. And then he found a picture of her that proved she was cheating on him during their time together. Once again, she was not remorseful for what she did. She was more concerned with finding out where she got the picture from. She was neither guilty of the fact that she was using this guy to get over her breakup with me. In fact, she accused him of using her for sex. Once again, she doesn't see any fault of her own. I'm just wondering how a person like her deserves to continue living life like this. It really annoys me that she gets away with everything because everybody thinks she's an angel when she's pure evil who doesn't think of anybody's feelings but herself. She continues to act this way without consequences because she expects us to be honorable and keep our mouths shut. I'm really sick of staying quiet for so long and I feel that the world deserves to know the truth about her. If there is justice in the world, she deserves to be severely punished. All my life, I tried to live like a good person but situations and people like her make me feel like this path that I have taken upon myself is futile is useless. Please help.
fishtaco Posted May 20, 2011 Posted May 20, 2011 If you want to be Judge Dredd and punish people like that, you'll be REALLY busy. And they won't learn the lesson either. Let them be. There's nothing you can do. The fact that you see her for who she really is, should help you get over her very quickly. I've had experiences like this. The #1 in my hall of fame, is this girl that is similar to how you described. Not quite as... irresponsible. But she does a great job pretending to be a compassionate caring person. When in reality, she is easily the most selfish person I know. She is someone that I am GLAD to cut out of my life. Look up the definition of a psychopath. They are people born without the ability to feel conscience and guilt. The less intelligent ones become criminals, the intelligent ones become successful CEO's and politicians. That's just how it is. They have NOTHING holding them back from their goal. As for you, you have to live a good life because you have to answer to yourself. If you have a conscience, then nothing would be worse than to betraying your own conscience. Your own guilt will put you in a personal hell and punish you for the rest of your life. So be good for the sake of yourself. Anyway, world is not fair. Just learn to spot those people and stay away.
Datura Posted May 20, 2011 Posted May 20, 2011 Well, it seems that the guy she cheated on does know the truth about her. She had sex with someone else after you two broke up, so why the need to confront her? I feel that the world deserves to know the truth about her.Is altruism really your motive? It has nothing to do with expressing fury and gaining vengeance? All my life, I tried to live like a good person but situations and people like her make me feel like this path that I have taken upon myself is futile is useless.If you say so. These feelings are yours alone, and controlled by you. Maintaining a level of decency as a human being has nothing to do with the iniquities of others. Either you adopt the iniquities of another, and suffer because of them, or you realize that character flaws will harm the person in the end, without having to take action yourself. By sacrificing your "good" qualities, you are only letting her win. We can't change others, but we can change ourselves.
Author XMizer Posted May 20, 2011 Author Posted May 20, 2011 Logically, your right. I should be able to forget about her really fast because of how messed up she is but the reason why I can't is because I was once associated with this girl. I once loved her, heavily emotionally invested in her, and trusted her. I consider myself to be a smart guy and not the most trusting of people and I feel really stupid for having been tricked by her. Right now, I'm even ashamed to admit that I once dated this girl and that I gave her my heart. And I don't understand why she can't just apologize properly to me. Why can't she at least give me some closure? I didn't do anything bad to her. It almost seems like she intentionally wants to hurt me and because of that, it seems like she's begging for someone to mess her up.
Jazzari Posted May 20, 2011 Posted May 20, 2011 What she did after you broke up is none of your business. Even if it was sleeping with someone else a week later. YOU BROKE UP. Why should she apologize? If she wants to sleep with a hundred guys, that's her choice. She might be scum, but she doesn't have to answer to you. What happened between her and her boyfriend is also none of your business. Stop obsessing about her and move on.
Sabali Posted May 20, 2011 Posted May 20, 2011 If you want to be Judge Dredd and punish people like that, you'll be REALLY busy. And they won't learn the lesson either. Let them be. There's nothing you can do. The fact that you see her for who she really is, should help you get over her very quickly. I've had experiences like this. The #1 in my hall of fame, is this girl that is similar to how you described. Not quite as... irresponsible. But she does a great job pretending to be a compassionate caring person. When in reality, she is easily the most selfish person I know. She is someone that I am GLAD to cut out of my life. Look up the definition of a psychopath. They are people born without the ability to feel conscience and guilt. The less intelligent ones become criminals, the intelligent ones become successful CEO's and politicians. That's just how it is. They have NOTHING holding them back from their goal. As for you, you have to live a good life because you have to answer to yourself. If you have a conscience, then nothing would be worse than to betraying your own conscience. Your own guilt will put you in a personal hell and punish you for the rest of your life. So be good for the sake of yourself. Anyway, world is not fair. Just learn to spot those people and stay away. Well-said. Yes, it is truly amazing to observe people who have no conscience but the fact of the matter is that there are plenty out there and they just happen to like to date just like everyone else. Hey, sometimes you become a victim of these people. Just let them win and move on. If you try to get revenge or teach them a lesson, they will only drag you down to their level and you won't be able to beat them because they are the ones with no conscience.
sanskrit Posted May 20, 2011 Posted May 20, 2011 This is exactly the place to vent stuff like this out, so get it out here. The world isn't fair, and bad people often do well. Doesn't mean we have to sit meekly without getting bent out of shape about it. It's OK to be angry when we are mistreated. As far as sleeping with the dude the week after you broke up, despite some very legalistic answers given here, that sucks, sorry that happened to you, and you probably already know that she was doing that kind of thing before you broke up. After you get out of the venting and angry stage, the best revenge on people like her is living well. That means putting her in your past as fast as possible and moving on to better things.
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