MrNiceGuy55 Posted May 19, 2011 Posted May 19, 2011 SORRY FOR THE BLOCK OF TEXT I APPRECIATE IF YOU READ IT AND GIVE ME YOUR ADVICE. Hi, I recently started dating a great girl and after 3 weeks i fell in love with her i know what you all might be thinking but i know it's real love. I have seen how some people reply saying dont be a girl i disagree just becaus you know how to treat a women that i am being a girl but i will accept it for the fact that she sometimes takes me for granted and treats me like a doormat and i don't say anything just for the fact that i think i might lose her. She is also in love with me but the way she said she figured out she was in love with me was by cheating she "pecked" another guy and realised she loved me and burst out crying and told me the same day it happened i forgave her because she figured out she loved me from it and i can tell how hurt she was obviously i was deeply hurt but i told her i will put it behind us and never mentioned again. Her past has been really bad and i can understand why she doesnt trust men which is why for her saying i love you is such a great deal which surprised her family friends and her self. The thing i really hate and puts me of is she plays these games where when shes in a mood she says its over etc but always say please take me back i love you and i cant live without you. It has only been one month that we have been going out but since the day we met we clicked it was natural it felt like we have been together forever but lately i feel like shes taking me for granted i treat her so great and i am very understanding but she doesnt put that much work in she says we are meeting today then changes her mind over 10 times so i dont know where i stand, i have talked to her before and she seems to understand but she doesn't change. My brain is telling me so stop because shes just going to continue doing this but my heart wont let me leave her so any advice?
BiscuitXOXO Posted May 19, 2011 Posted May 19, 2011 I understand how you can fall for someone so hard...but do you really think, after the rainbows and unicorns disappear a few more months down the line, that you will put up with her ****?
VicJay79 Posted May 19, 2011 Posted May 19, 2011 MrNiceGuy, You want the honest truth. You need to tell her to stop playing games plain and simple or you will find someone else that will appreciate you for what you have to offer. I have dated a lot of girls that were 'damaged' due to prior bad relationships. Its one thing to give them some 'room' to figure things out, BUT its another thing to let them have freedom to violate the basic rules of dating and relationships. I have told many girls, that maybe they aren't ready for a guy like me. I will treat them nice, i will be kind to them, and I will be romantic. Some women don't want that, others don't realize they want it until its to late. In either case, I said good-bye. It hurts a lot, but getting played with games is even worse. SORRY FOR THE BLOCK OF TEXT I APPRECIATE IF YOU READ IT AND GIVE ME YOUR ADVICE. Hi, I recently started dating a great girl and after 3 weeks i fell in love with her i know what you all might be thinking but i know it's real love. I have seen how some people reply saying dont be a girl i disagree just becaus you know how to treat a women that i am being a girl but i will accept it for the fact that she sometimes takes me for granted and treats me like a doormat and i don't say anything just for the fact that i think i might lose her. She is also in love with me but the way she said she figured out she was in love with me was by cheating she "pecked" another guy and realised she loved me and burst out crying and told me the same day it happened i forgave her because she figured out she loved me from it and i can tell how hurt she was obviously i was deeply hurt but i told her i will put it behind us and never mentioned again. Her past has been really bad and i can understand why she doesnt trust men which is why for her saying i love you is such a great deal which surprised her family friends and her self. The thing i really hate and puts me of is she plays these games where when shes in a mood she says its over etc but always say please take me back i love you and i cant live without you. It has only been one month that we have been going out but since the day we met we clicked it was natural it felt like we have been together forever but lately i feel like shes taking me for granted i treat her so great and i am very understanding but she doesnt put that much work in she says we are meeting today then changes her mind over 10 times so i dont know where i stand, i have talked to her before and she seems to understand but she doesn't change. My brain is telling me so stop because shes just going to continue doing this but my heart wont let me leave her so any advice?
Author MrNiceGuy55 Posted May 19, 2011 Author Posted May 19, 2011 Thank you both for taking the time to read it and comment. BiscuitXOXO i honestly don't know i love her and she says she wants marriage and everything with me but then at times like this she ruins it all, as a lady do you not appreciate a nice, understanding guy? VicJay i guess your right but i am deeply in love with her shes met my family i have met hers and it's so hard to imagine not being with her because i know shes the one, i know i may seem pathetic as a guy but i am a very down to earth romantic guy and i wont change.
alethean Posted May 19, 2011 Posted May 19, 2011 You fell for her quite fast. Not a problem at all, but consider the fact that if she is already behaving this way during the honeymoon phase of the relationship, imagine what would happen when the limerence or infatuation eventually fades. Some people take advantage of those who are too nice. You can be a kind and considerate guy and still be assertive.
Author MrNiceGuy55 Posted May 19, 2011 Author Posted May 19, 2011 Yeah i fell fast she is the perfect girl in my eyes obviously and i dont want to be one of those guys who says dont do this dont do that because i am the jealous type but i can control it. I am not too nice but i do i treat her like anyone would want to be treated.
BiscuitXOXO Posted May 19, 2011 Posted May 19, 2011 BiscuitXOXO i honestly don't know i love her and she says she wants marriage and everything with me but then at times like this she ruins it all, as a lady do you not appreciate a nice, understanding guy? Of course I appreciate a nice and understanding guy. But I also appreciate men who don't get stepped all over by their gf's. I also despise men who think being "nice" is putting up with a crazy girl's mood swings. But that's not the issue here. I bolded what really stuck out to me. Her behaviour is not healthy for either of you. Although I suppose you could be idealizing romance. And besides, it has only been THREE WEEKS, and you are already talking about marriage...which is basically a committment to staying the rest of your life with her, as well as tying your finances and legal issues to her. Plus you are only 19. I think you know, in your heart, how you will deal with her. Otherwise, why would you be posting on LS? "My brain is telling me to stop because shes just going to continue doing this but my heart wont let me leave her so any advice?" Mind over matter baby
Author MrNiceGuy55 Posted May 19, 2011 Author Posted May 19, 2011 I am 19, what does age have to do with any of this believe me i have past my share of ordeals, i am asking advice as i am in a situation where i feel like im between a rock and a hard place so can you please not be patronizing.
Author MrNiceGuy55 Posted May 19, 2011 Author Posted May 19, 2011 I am just trying to put my mind at ease its hard to let her go but i will speak to her once more and if nothing changes i will post back lol
BiscuitXOXO Posted May 19, 2011 Posted May 19, 2011 I'm younger than you hehe I hope I don't sound too patronizing 19 is just a really young age to decide the girl you are with is "The One." Please post bk! Looking forward to it; hope you can work things out
Author MrNiceGuy55 Posted May 19, 2011 Author Posted May 19, 2011 Trust me i had the same state of mind as you but you know when you find "the one" because your willing to do anything just to see them smile and there are times where if it wasn't "the one" you would just say you know what i am not bothered it's over but when your with "the one" you do everything to make it work. Thanks for the replies everyone.
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