Would you date a web cam model?

[fishtaco]

By that standard, we should not condemn the Nazis (on an individual level) either. They were just doing what everyone else in Germany was doing at the time.

 

By the way, I'm not trying to compare strippers to Nazis. My point is that I have no problem condemning immoral behaviour even if "everyone else" is doing. And besides, the vast majority of women are NOT doing it.

 

You just godwin'ed this thread. Nazis committed genocide. I not sure if "everyone else" committed genocide. Plus even in my earlier post, I said getting naked isn't as bad as killing people. So using a "killing people" example isn't exactly a fitting counter argument.

 

Again you missed my point. Not every woman is in the sex trade, but everyone "want to make easy money". So women in the sex trade because they want to make easy money is the same as everyone else that want to make easy money.

 

You can choose not to date someone without condemning them you know.

 

 

This guy also condemns women for behaving in immoral ways. Just not your view of immoral ways. I'm bringing this up because when you get into these sort of discussion, you can't have the view where you are the center of the universe, and your immorality ranking trumps everyone else's immorality ranking. Whether you like it or not, immorality is an artificial human concept. Which means not everyone subscribe to your view.

 

And I'd like to draw the parallel between this extremist's views - somehow controlling the morality of women is key to a successful civilization. How come women always get the short end of the stick? Why is controlling the behavior of women so important?

 

Anyway, I think it's better to just say "I don't date them", but not bring any immorality into it.

[fishtaco]

How men and women relate to each other is one of the most fundamental of the building blocks of any society. It needs to be strong and sturdy like the rest of the foundation. If any part of it is crumbling then nothing you build on top of it can stand. The sex industry is just one facet of this which includes as well promiscuity, sexual abuse, child support, infidelity, and the list goes on.

 

I'm sorry, but I don't agree with you. If the sex industry is completely wiped out, that's not going to change the way men and women relate to each other. Using Feelsgoodman's point - not all women are in the sex trade. There are plenty of men and women that do NOT participate. I for one have not paid money of anything. If the free porn weren't available, then I'd probably go play some video games instead, it's just something to do when I'm bored, and I prefer free internet porn over video games because I get addicted to video games. Porn I can walk away from. Yes, I'm a nerd. A well designed video game > porn any day, but will also eat away months of my life.

 

So if the sex industry disappears, I'm still going to be jaded toward women due to my past dating experiences. Every selfish and inconsiderate woman I come across, puts me deeper into my cynical views. That has nothing to so with the sex industry.

 

So even if how men and women relate to each other is the building block, then I'd still argue the sex industry has little to no impact. My view is, the success of the sex industry is merely a symptom. Treating the headache won't make the brain tumor go away.

[perfectlyunique]

You just godwin'ed this thread. Nazis committed genocide. I not sure if "everyone else" committed genocide. Plus even in my earlier post, I said getting naked isn't as bad as killing people. So using a "killing people" example isn't exactly a fitting counter argument.

 

 

eh why are webcam performers being compared to the nazis? no where near the same ..killings illegal ..and down right evil ..webcam performers do it to earn money doing something thats perfectly safe and no killing involved at all plus legal ..confused lol

[Jazzari]

It isn't any one person's fault but everyone's. If people are looking to the sex industry to solve cash flow issues due to unemployment and the sex trade is always hiring then we the people need to help them financially through better welfare programs. That isn't the end of the reforms needed. It is just the first and more of a stop gap initiative. There are too many who are too rich and too many who are too poor to allow for this. In human history we have never had it this good and resources have never been so plentiful. There needs to be greater balance or expect an even greater toppling.

I disagree with this. I don't need or want welfare. The "rich" worked hard and made huge sacrifices to get that way. The money is theirs and rightfully so. Nobody should take it away from them. Besides which, it's the rich that provide jobs and often voluntarily make huge donations to their charities of choice. They are doing their part and I don't need or expect more.

[Star Gazer]

Does it really matter what any of us think? If your BF is okay with it, that's all that should matter...right?

[fishtaco]

eh why are webcam performers being compared to the nazis? no where near the same ..killings illegal ..and down right evil ..webcam performers do it to earn money doing something thats perfectly safe and no killing involved at all plus legal ..confused lol

 

I think Feelsgoodman was eager to prove his point, but may have chosen a not so well thought out analogy.

 

But my bad for bringing in philosophical discussion. It's not my preference to label things outside of my personal preference as immoral.

[Jazzari]

Does it really matter what any of us think? If your BF is okay with it, that's all that should matter...right?

It's always interesting to hear what others think.

 

It obviously matters what my BF thinks but a knowledge of how the general population thinks is also valuable. Let's say it was ok with my current SO. But then we break up down the line. What are the chances of this "career" move being ok with my next BF? It's a concern.

 

And here's a funny thing. I wouldn't be happy if it was OK with my current BF. I would WANT him to object.

 

The money would be great but I'm not at rock bottom yet so I won't be doing this.

[perfectlyunique]

Does it really matter what any of us think? If your BF is okay with it, that's all that should matter...right?

 

agreed my bf first suggested us both doing it but with the hours he worked it wasnt possible so he told me if i wanted to i could. so i did

 

I think Feelsgoodman was eager to prove his point, but may have chosen a not so well thought out analogy.

 

But my bad for bringing in philosophical discussion. It's not my preference to label things outside of my personal preference as immoral.

 

oh i see

 

 

 

i think most people assume being a web cam performer makes you easy or some sort of slag. its not always the case, men are more visual so they always seek out things like that. It seemed like a good way to make money. Now i want more of myself that was just something to make ends meat. if people think thats wrong then sorry but sod them my little boy eating and having things he needs is way more important!

[sagetalk]

I don't need or want welfare. The "rich" worked hard and made huge sacrifices to get that way. The money is theirs and rightfully so. Nobody should take it away from them. Besides which, it's the rich that provide jobs and often voluntarily make huge donations to their charities of choice. They are doing their part and I don't need or expect more.

 

You sound like an intelligent young woman, those are solid beliefs that are admirable. You can do a heck of lot better than being a web cam girl. Don't sell yourself short when you get in a pinch again.

[perfectlyunique]

The money would be great but I'm not at rock bottom yet so I won't be doing this.

 

i wouldnt suggest it to anyone really but i dont regret it. i have a little boy to think about and his happiness comes over mine even though he can be such a pain in the bum lol

[Jazzari]

i wouldnt suggest it to anyone really but i dont regret it. i have a little boy to think about and his happiness comes over mine even though he can be such a pain in the bum lol

You have a huge amount of respect from me for putting your little boy's needs ahead of your own.

 

You sound like an intelligent young woman, those are solid beliefs that are admirable. You can do a heck of lot better than being a web cam girl. Don't sell yourself short when you get in a pinch again.

Thank you!

[perfectlyunique]

You have a huge amount of respect from me for putting your little boy's needs ahead of your own.

 

Thank you!

 

thanks although not many people think that way but i do appreciate it

[musemaj11]

Why are people so judgmental of the sex industry? Everyone of us is involved in the sex industry in one way or another. A woman asking money from her husband is no different than a woman asking money from a client for example. Society is just picky on what form of prostitution they want to endorse.

[JohnnyCage]

i wouldnt suggest it to anyone really but i dont regret it. i have a little boy to think about and his happiness comes over mine even though he can be such a pain in the bum lol

What I think you did is not put your son's happiness above your own but just use him as bait to justify your actions to make money easily. When he grows up and you tell him that you were a webcam performer and tell him that you did it for him do you think he would come running to you and hug you and give you a big kiss? I don't think so.

 

Most people look to something (mostly emotional) to justify their wrongdoing. If for example you were a father instead of a mother and your situation was exactly the same as back then what would your options be? Would you just give up on your son? Since you are not a woman and you can't be a webcam model there was no hope right?

[perfectlyunique]

What I think you did is not put your son's happiness above your own but just use him as bait to justify your actions to make money easily. When he grows up and you tell him that you were a webcam performer and tell him that you did it for him do you think he would come running to you and hug you and give you a big kiss? I don't think so.

 

Most people look to something (mostly emotional) to justify their wrongdoing. If for example you were a father instead of a mother and your situation was exactly the same as back then what would your options be? Would you just give up on your son? Since you are not a woman and you can't be a webcam model there was no hope right?

 

actually you couldnt be more wrong, i dont have to justify my actions on why i become a webcam performer at all its 100% legal. its a job like any other and you get paid for it. i couldnt get a job anywhere else and i could there so where is there a problem?? and as i mentioned in earlier posts my son will never know because i would never tell him. would you have to give a reason for why someone becomes a shop keeper or whatever no ,its a job and earns you money.just like being a webcam performer is. no one else was willing to give me a chance at a job as id been out of work for so long and like i say jobs here are few and far between.

 

we where struggling for money and i could get a job there so i did it so bloody what??

 

also who said that becoming a webcam model was wrong even if someone wanted to become one???

oh and by the way being a webcam model isnt easy money you have to work for your money as does anyone else in a job.

[Jazzari]

What I think you did is not put your son's happiness above your own but just use him as bait to justify your actions to make money easily. When he grows up and you tell him that you were a webcam performer and tell him that you did it for him do you think he would come running to you and hug you and give you a big kiss? I don't think so.

 

Most people look to something (mostly emotional) to justify their wrongdoing. If for example you were a father instead of a mother and your situation was exactly the same as back then what would your options be? Would you just give up on your son? Since you are not a woman and you can't be a webcam model there was no hope right?

That was really uncalled for.

 

Why the hell would she tell him she was a webcam model? Or discuss her past sexual life in any way for that matter? You're way off on this.

 

Do you think her son would be better off if she worked 24/7 and was never there for him when he needed her?

 

And there ARE male webcam models. And other options in the sex industry for men.

 

Your welcome to your opinion on modeling. But accusing someone of using their child as bait is way, way over the line. It just shows that a person's career choice is not a good judge of character. Because she has shown herself to be a much better person than you have.

[perfectlyunique]

That was really uncalled for.

 

Why the hell would she tell him she was a webcam model? Or discuss her past sexual life in any way for that matter? You're way off on this.

 

Do you think her son would be better off if she worked 24/7 and was never there for him when he needed her?

 

And there ARE male webcam models. And other options in the sex industry for men.

 

Your welcome to your opinion on modeling. But accusing someone of using their child as bait is way, way over the line. It just shows that a person's career choice is not a good judge of character. Because she has shown herself to be a much better person than you have.

 

thankyou for that,

 

no way would i use my son as a reason to make easy money. the simple fact is i couldnt get a job anywhere else..to be quite honest im still finding it hard now considering the uks job situation

[Feelsgoodman]

also who said that becoming a webcam model was wrong even if someone wanted to become one???

Umm, you said it yourself:

 

to be honest i worked as one for about a year a few years ago. you do make a fair bit of money but i wouldnt really suggest doing it to anyone it made me feel crap about myself and i started to hate men and think they was after only one thing.

And then you said it again:

 

i would never go back to the webcam thing i hated every minute of it tbh. its sounds so easy but personally it made me feel rubbish about myself

And again:

 

good good u dont wanna put urself through that

And again...:

 

...i regret it and hated every minute, everyone makes mistakes.

And again..........:

 

personally i hated every minute of it...

And again........................:

 

It wasnt a great situation to be in and i will never ever go back because i believe im better than that...

 

Don't you think you're being a little contradictory? On the one had, you admit that you hated it, that you would never go back to it, and that it was a mistake. On the hand, you are desperately trying to convince everyone (and it seems yourself first and foremost) that it's just another job and there is nothing wrong with it.

 

I think people would have a lot more respect for you if you just admitted that you made a bad decision and have learned from it, instead of engaging in endless rationalization - and even worse, using your son to justify your actions.

 

By the way, I always thought that the UK was a socialist country with fairly generous social assistance? You always hear Brits whine about immigrants coming to their country to exploit their welfare system. Why couldn't you apply for welfare if money was so tight that you literally couldn't put food on the table and there were no jobs available?

Edited May 20, 2011 by Feelsgoodman

[SxB]

Would you date a webcam model? Or is that no different from prostitution?

 

A prostitute can be some one who sells there body for loot.

 

So would I date a prostitute? Sure, why not, as long as she doesn't charge me by the hour.

[perfectlyunique]

Umm, you said it yourself:

 

 

And then you said it again:

 

 

And again:

 

 

And again...:

 

 

And again..........:

 

 

And again........................:

 

 

 

Don't you think you're being a little contradictory? On the one had, you admit that you hated it, that you would never go back to it, and that it was a mistake. On the hand, you are desperately trying to convince everyone (and it seems yourself first and foremost) that i's just another job and there is nothing wrong with it.

 

I think people would have a lot more respect for you if you just admitted that you made a bad decision and have learned from it, instead of engaging in endless rationalization - and even worse, using your son to justify your actions.

 

By the way, I always thought that the UK was a socialist country with fairly generous social assistance? You always hear the Brits whine about immigrants coming to their country to exploit their welfare system. Why couldn't you apply for welfare if money was so tight that you literally couldn't put food on the table?

 

 

just because i didnt like it doesnt mean that someone else wouldnt like it. im quite shy about my body and found that i didnt enjoy doing it, i dont enjoy playing football either doesnt mean others wouldnt. also like i said its a JOB .. you know nothing of my situation back then. we where struggling financially , i couldnt get a job anywhere , they would give me a job. if i didnt start bringing money in then we would have to choose between paying the rent or food hummm difficult decision ..ultimatley if i didnt we would lose the house and id have to move back in with my mum sharing a room with my son...now that wouldnt be fair on him would it...

 

i provided for my son end of doesnt matter what the job was because as a mum thats your resposibility. i said you would have to be a strong person to do it. also i believe im better than that because i didnt enjoy doing it. other people might there not all like me

Edited May 20, 2011 by perfectlyunique

[JohnnyCage]

just because i didnt like it doesnt mean that someone else wouldnt like it. im quite shy about my body and found that i didnt enjoy doing it, i dont enjoy playing football either doesnt mean others wouldnt. also like i said its a JOB .. you know nothing of my situation back then. we where struggling financially , i couldnt get a job anywhere , they would give me a job. if i didnt start bringing money in then we would have to choose between paying the rent or food hummm difficult decision ..ultimatley if i didnt we would lose the house and id have to move back in with my mum sharing a room with my son...now that wouldnt be fair on him would it...

 

i provided for my son end of doesnt matter what the job was because as a mum thats your resposibility. i said you would have to be a strong person to do it. also i believe im better than that because i didnt enjoy doing it. other people might there not all like me

Apparently you are not too shy about your body as you did it. What I mean to say is if you were not good looking or downright ugly to become a webcam model what would you have done then? That is what I need to know because if you tell me if that was the case and your life was finished and that you would have given up on your son then it makes sense that what you did was acceptable given the state of condition you were in.

 

But until that you are still using your son as justification for your actions.

[Feelsgoodman]

just because i didnt like it doesnt mean that someone else wouldnt like it. im quite shy about my body and found that i didnt enjoy doing it, i dont enjoy playing football either doesnt mean others wouldnt. also like i said its a JOB ..

Being a prostitute is also a job, as prostitution is legal in many countries. Would you say that there is nothing wrong with being a prostitute?

 

Again, I'd like to know why you couldn't go on welfare while you were searching for a more respectable job?

[perfectlyunique]

Apparently you are not too shy about your body as you did it. What I mean to say is if you were not good looking or downright ugly to become a webcam model what would you have done then? That is what I need to know because if you tell me if that was the case and your life was finished and that you would have given up on your son then it makes sense that what you did was acceptable given the state of condition you were in.

 

But until that you are still using your son as justification for your actions.

 

i would never give up on my son because i love him, like i said we would have had to move back in with my mum which wasnt a good move as id have to share a room with my little boy and my brother was there also and he has mental health issues. i mean big ones.

 

anyone can become a webcam performer as different people have different tastes. my body that great to be honest which is why i felt stupid sometimes doing it. but i earned some money and it kept us going as a family and personally there was nothing wrong with that.

 

would people rather i sat back and watched us lose our house well sorry but thats stupid! i had an option and i went for it

[perfectlyunique]

Being a prostitute is also a job, as prostitution is legal in many countries. Would you say that there is nothing wrong with being a prostitute?

 

Again, I'd like to know why you couldn't go on welfare while you were searching for a more respectable job?

 

that wouldnt cover it.we had got in debt already because my bfs job messed him about. we owed rent and owed some friends. now im in a different house have sorted all the debt and paid back the money i owe to everyone. ive never been back to that job, even though i still cant find work but my bf has a good job right now and we can manage

[oaks]

Perfectlyunique, don't waste your time trying to 'defend' yourself against people whose viewpoint is already made up.

 

Back to the original question: I forgot to say that not only would I support my gf if she was in this situation, but I would offer to hold the camera.