temporaryvisa Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 I am 19 years old and insanely insecure. When I first joined this site more than a year ago, my main intention was to--seriously--fish for compliments. I was mostly on here to pretend to have dating troubles but really, I was posting pics of myself and claiming things like, I don't understand why people find me soooooooooo attractive! :/ Then after a while I got blocked. I'm so ****ing mad at myself now for being that transparent and disgusting. Now I REALLY have dating issues and I KNOW its because I am so damn insecure. All day I look at myself in the mirror and being quite pretty is never enough. I gotta be the hottest chick there or I'm majorly sad. I whine, I complain, I'm never grateful. I get hot guys staring at me and then I'm on a high. Some guy says I'm merely cute, I'm depressed as ****. WHY? I am so scared of getting old it's not funny. I work at Scotiabank and I already am saving for stuff like microdermabrasion, etc. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I think that people who think I'm hot are seriously delusional. I like to say, "Beauty is an illusion" because well, for me, it really is. I have a very cute face and big boobs, but ugly nipples, stretch marks. As well as HAIR. I'm actually unattractive naked. And it kills me when I'm reminded. I wish I could get confidence. Has anyone ever dated highly insecure girls before? Is there a more unattractive trait?
Kari Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 You have to learn to love yourself. Everyone has flaws, in my case I choose to embrace them. You shouldn't use how others see you as a way to define how attractive you are. Everyone has a different eye for beauty. Someones "super model" is another "average Jane" I know that I will age one day, we can't keep our youth for eternity. This is why it is essential to love yourself as a whole. Before you get into the dating scene you need to take the time to work on yourself. You can't love others if you can't love yourself.
Author temporaryvisa Posted May 18, 2011 Author Posted May 18, 2011 You have to learn to love yourself. Everyone has flaws, in my case I choose to embrace them. You shouldn't use how others see you as a way to define how attractive you are. Everyone has a different eye for beauty. Someones "super model" is another "average Jane" I know that I will age one day, we can't keep our youth for eternity. This is why it is essential to love yourself as a whole. Before you get into the dating scene you need to take the time to work on yourself. You can't love others if you can't love yourself. Ahh lol! This sem I got a gpa of 3.75, was quite happy..for an hour or so. The happiness from my accomplishments barely ever last. I don't have many hobbies or very many friends. I like being alone. I like getting attention/being noticed but I havent had a bf in forever...Not many guys like me or want to date me. Actually they think ...well, I'm immature. I hate this. Being pretty hasn't given me love, and I don't even feel pretty in the first place. I hate that I'm so obsessive.
Author temporaryvisa Posted May 18, 2011 Author Posted May 18, 2011 Are you sure you're not seeking attention now? You just added a new album all pictures today. You know the posters here have compassion, they will tell you your a pretty girl. You know you are. The reason you aren't getting dates is because you are vain. Work on loving yourself more. You shouldn't need the attention of others in order to feel good about yourself. Lmao! I add these pictures, when I see an album I have to add !! It is like an addiction for sure. But I swear, it is not for attention this time. I know I have stretch marks ALLL over my bum and I have ugly big nipples I'm plump and have a hard time staying lean. I have to wax/shave everywhere. I am not that hot. But why do I find the need to be? Wow, I sound really stupid. But this is a legitimate heartache...constantly I am obsessed
Kari Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 Lmao! I add these pictures, when I see an album I have to add !! It is like an addiction for sure. But I swear, it is not for attention this time. I know I have stretch marks ALLL over my bum and I have ugly big nipples I'm plump and have a hard time staying lean. I have to wax/shave everywhere. I am not that hot. But why do I find the need to be? Wow, I sound really stupid. But this is a legitimate heartache...constantly I am obsessed Sorry I did have sympathy for you at first, but I'm really lacking it now. My advice stands, work on yourself as a whole. It's perfectly fine to have a album, I used to have one. Thing is, it doesn't help when you uploaded them seconds after this thread was created.
orion1010 Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 Ahh lol! This sem I got a gpa of 3.75, was quite happy..for an hour or so. The happiness from my accomplishments barely ever last. I don't have many hobbies or very many friends. I like being alone. I like getting attention/being noticed but I havent had a bf in forever...Not many guys like me or want to date me. Actually they think ...well, I'm immature. I hate this. Being pretty hasn't given me love, and I don't even feel pretty in the first place. I hate that I'm so obsessive. Go skydiving, travel to China and hunt a snow leopard or something..do something to live your life and stop obessing or before you know it, you will become your worst nightmare. Old, wrinkly, saggy, UGLY and ALONE with this attitude. Just my two cents..
Dust Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 You’re very insecure, yet very good looking. I’ve never met the woman who didn’t look better naked. Even if you had a giant twisted deformity in the middle of your torso you’d still be hot. So, stop being an insecure teenager and start being a confident women.
Author temporaryvisa Posted May 18, 2011 Author Posted May 18, 2011 Sorry I did have sympathy for you at first, but I'm really lacking it now. My advice stands, work on yourself as a whole. It's perfectly fine to have a album, I used to have one. Thing is, it doesn't help when you uploaded them seconds after this thread was created. Thanks for your advice. So now, people cannot see my photos anymore. And now they will have to deal with what I'm saying I know, I'm nutty... Work on myself as a whole... I don't drink much, I don't smoke, I have a good job, I've been an OK kid, I'm nice, I'm smart enough, what ELSE can I do? Like, I don't know what the hell to do. I'm not a special kid. Not the smartest one in the family. I just feel empty 90 % of the time.
Kari Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 I think she is cute. So do I, no doubt about it. OP is very cute. Thing is, if she doesn't face her insecurities they will eat her up. I know I came off as somewhat harsh, but it's how it is.
Author temporaryvisa Posted May 18, 2011 Author Posted May 18, 2011 Honestly I dont think you are attractive at all. I also do not think I am attractive.. Do I come across as thinking I'm very attractive? What you just said will make me feel very depressed for the next few days. I'll wake up feeling sad, I think.
orion1010 Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 Honestly I dont think you are attractive at all. Well..it sounds like that's what she really wants to hear... Something seems fake or does not seem right here....
musemaj11 Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 I also do not think I am attractive.. Do I come across as thinking I'm very attractive? What you just said will make me feel very depressed for the next few days. I'll wake up feeling sad, I think. Lol, I said that just to mess with you. You are not ugly. But you do sound crazy though.
Author temporaryvisa Posted May 18, 2011 Author Posted May 18, 2011 I've deleted any semblance of any photo. I want to start getting confidence from within. I understand I'm not being very articulate, coming across as conceited/bratty. I can't explain how I feel very well. That guy that said I was unattractive...That hurt me a lot. I wish it didn't. I don't even know the guy.
Dust Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 I also do not think I am attractive.. Do I come across as thinking I'm very attractive? What you just said will make me feel very depressed for the next few days. I'll wake up feeling sad, I think. Yes you are very attractive but this is not the place to have that affirmed. I see you took down your album I recommend you also take down your avatar picture. (oh you already did) I saw your pictures though and can tell you are very pretty. You would also be very sexy naked. My suggestion for you is to get out and live your life. Give no thought to things such as this. If you do the things you enjoy in life and don’t hide away you will find the things you want. Even with a husband who tells you that you are more beautiful then any woman and how he would die for you the light of his life more beautiful every day he knows you… you would still be unhappy if you didn’t love yourself. Don’t judge yourself, don’t let others judge you, and live life to the fullest… that means without fear! Fear is a cage so free yourself.
Author temporaryvisa Posted May 18, 2011 Author Posted May 18, 2011 LMAO! Omg, did you really save my photos? Oh man, one day I will get in trouble for having photos up on random sites like these!! Okay, to better formulate my questions/pleas for help: 1) What can I think to myself when I start feeling that pain, or when someone says something not-so-flattering, or when I see a very very beautiful woman? What can I do to stay confident? 2) What can I do to un-shallow myself? Is it possible to reprogram the way you think?
Dust Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 LMAO! Omg, did you really save my photos? Oh man, one day I will get in trouble for having photos up on random sites like these!! Okay, to better formulate my questions/pleas for help: 1) What can I think to myself when I start feeling that pain, or when someone says something not-so-flattering, or when I see a very very beautiful woman? What can I do to stay confident? 2) What can I do to un-shallow myself? Is it possible to reprogram the way you think? Just think positive things. It’s already obvious you are a positive person so why are you so negative about yourself?
Author temporaryvisa Posted May 18, 2011 Author Posted May 18, 2011 Yes you are very attractive but this is not the place to have that affirmed. I see you took down your album I recommend you also take down your avatar picture. (oh you already did) I saw your pictures though and can tell you are very pretty. You would also be very sexy naked. My suggestion for you is to get out and live your life. Give no thought to things such as this. If you do the things you enjoy in life and don’t hide away you will find the things you want. Even with a husband who tells you that you are more beautiful then any woman and how he would die for you the light of his life more beautiful every day he knows you… you would still be unhappy if you didn’t love yourself. Don’t judge yourself, don’t let others judge you, and live life to the fullest… that means without fear! Fear is a cage so free yourself. haha, you are feeding my addiction. Thanks, but you have no idea how bad my flaws actually are. But moving on.. Live my life. HOW do I live my life like you say, with full open arms and NOT think of the way I look? I am BOMBARDED with people who have things to say about how I look, good or bad. Maaaaan I want to mention something. This is the truth. My mom has 12 toes, and a large birthmark on her face. She is SO extremely confident. When she was my age she had TONS of friends and guys after her...She got her confidence from within As you can imagine, she thinks I'm a loser.
Kari Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 LMAO! Omg, did you really save my photos? Oh man, one day I will get in trouble for having photos up on random sites like these!! Okay, to better formulate my questions/pleas for help: 1) What can I think to myself when I start feeling that pain, or when someone says something not-so-flattering, or when I see a very very beautiful woman? What can I do to stay confident? 2) What can I do to un-shallow myself? Is it possible to reprogram the way you think? Women in general are very competitive. We won't be attractive to everyone. I get compliments about my looks from some, while others wouldn't agree. Everyone sees through different eyes. If someone puts you down, remind yourself of what other great qualities you have. Just because someone puts you down, it doesn't mean what they've said is true. It is possible to reprogram your thinking. As you grow as an individual the way you think changes over time.
Author temporaryvisa Posted May 18, 2011 Author Posted May 18, 2011 Women in general are very competitive. We won't be attractive to everyone. I get compliments about my looks from some, while others wouldn't agree. Everyone sees through different eyes. If someone puts you down, remind yourself of what other great qualities you have. Just because someone puts you down, it doesn't mean what they've said is true. It is possible to reprogram your thinking. As you grow as an individual the way you think changes over time. I want to change. I want to change VERY badly. I'm depressed all the time, comparing myself to others under a HUGE microscope! I'm regretting this thread. I know I could've worded stuff better. Also it was an impulse thread. The other day this guy said I was a 7/10. Just randomly. On the bus. I was so...****, I was so mad/sad/ugh for DAYS. I mean just some random dude, but WHY did he say that and WHY do I care? Man, my brain is ****ED up
Dust Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 Every one gets put down, especially people who have things going good for them. That’s just the nature of things. When things are good you should be happy, not let a put down ruin things. When things are bad you need to trust in yourself and not let people keep you down. You see there will always be things you can’t control. You just have to control the one thing you have the most power over, your attitude. Make it a good one. You seem really fun by the way. I think you know that though. Have fun and stop thinking about things like “am I good enough.” You are good enough, just being alive proves that. Live life!
Kari Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 I want to change. I want to change VERY badly. I'm depressed all the time, comparing myself to others under a HUGE microscope! I'm regretting this thread. I know I could've worded stuff better. Also it was an impulse thread. The other day this guy said I was a 7/10. Just randomly. On the bus. I was so...****, I was so mad/sad/ugh for DAYS. I mean just some random dude, but WHY did he say that and WHY do I care? Man, my brain is ****ED up The numbers scale is a joke. As again, some people would give me a "7" some would give me a "9-10" where some would give me a flat out "4". Never take the numbers scale seriously. You are more than a piece of meat. It's normal to notice beautiful women. Instead of being jealous, I appreciate there beauty. If I see a woman who looks amazing, I will tell her so! I feel no reason to be catty, I will just end up with resentment. Today, a woman looked me up and down, and then proceeded to give me a dirty eye. I looked good today, all I did to respond was smile and tell her Hello! Don't feel bad about the thread, what is done is done. Right now just work on using the positive advice given.
Kari Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 I'll give you a 1 because you are #1 in my book. D'aww. You get a #1 too
somedude81 Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 and I have ugly big nipples Sorry, I'm a breast man and that line just jumped out at me. Why do you think big nipples are ugly?
Dust Posted May 18, 2011 Posted May 18, 2011 Girls can't judge nipples correctly. Shes driven herself mad thinking about this stuff.
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