Men Find Frugal Women Sexy, Study Says

[musemaj11]

ALMOST two-thirds of men find a frugal blind date sexy and smart, while women think men who pinch pennies are boring, according to the findings of a new study.

 

The survey by financial giant ING Direct USA of 1000 Americans revealed women are twice as likely to be upset by a partner who spends too little on them.

A third of women described frugal as "stingy" compared to 20 per cent of men, and less than half of women surveyed believed a frugal blind date was smart and sexy.

The majority of men and women (68 per cent) agreed that women are better at managing household finances, including managing bills and household spending.

Women were also 56 per cent more likely to give up sex than men to pay off debts. However, when it comes to sex versus chocolate - chocolate wins. Women were less willing to give up chocolate and shopping (39 per cent) than they were sex and alcohol (16 per cent) to eliminate debt.

 

 

When it came to accumulating more debt and other financial woes, women find personal issues more upsetting than financial ones, while men feel the opposite.

Men would be more upset about losing their job than finding out about an unfaithful spouse or accumulating debt, but women would be shattered by an unfaithful spouse but not so upset at losing their job or accumulating debt.

Gaining weight would upset women more than accumulating debt, but men were found to be more concerned about gaining debt than a few extra pounds.

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/money/money-matters/stingy-women-are-sexy-study-says/story-fn312ws8-1225910547526

I have always been saying this and just like most men I agree with it. Men dont necessarily want women to split the bill on dates. Its just that we want women who show that they care about our spending and want us to save instead of judging our interest in them by how much we spend on them.

 

Anyway, its interesting that women would rather give up on sex than chocolate.

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Honestly, not too surprising.

[refurb]

A couple of my experiences:

 

1. Was dating a girl, moved away but kept dating. I said I wanted to come see her (she lived 2h away). When we were setting up a date, she offered to drive half way to meet me (+1 point). When I told her I'll just drive the whole way since there was more to do in her city and she'd hit so much traffic that it would take her way longer than me, she agreed. When we met for dinner, she refused to let me pay since I drove so far (+1 point).

 

2. Another girl I met at a business dinner in China. I bought the table a bottle of Chinese wine. Once we were done she insisted on paying for it (+1 points). I of course refused, but she only let me after going back and forth about 5 times.

 

It has nothing to do with the money and mostly to do with a woman demonstrating her appreciation for people who do things for her. For me, I'm picturing what she'll be like 5 years into a marriage.

 

RF

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

A couple of my experiences:

 

1. Was dating a girl, moved away but kept dating. I said I wanted to come see her (she lived 2h away). When we were setting up a date, she offered to drive half way to meet me (+1 point). When I told her I'll just drive the whole way since there was more to do in her city and she'd hit so much traffic that it would take her way longer than me, she agreed. When we met for dinner, she refused to let me pay since I drove so far (+1 point).

 

2. Another girl I met at a business dinner in China. I bought the table a bottle of Chinese wine. Once we were done she insisted on paying for it (+1 points). I of course refused, but she only let me after going back and forth about 5 times.

 

It has nothing to do with the money and mostly to do with a woman demonstrating her appreciation for people who do things for her. For me, I'm picturing what she'll be like 5 years into a marriage.

 

RF

 

What is wrong with those two examples?

 

Personally, I'd be delighted to find a woman who appreciated what I did, liked me for it, and wasn't turned off by my kindness.

 

My experience is that most women aren't like the above, and if I met either of those two women, I would have won the dating lottery.

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Sorry, I misread that. I thought you were saying it was a bad thing!

[musemaj11]

Women are least concerned with accumulating debt but they are considered better at managing household finances. That's a major disconnect.

Meaning they are good at handling tasks such as making sure all the bills are paid on time. You know, the 'secretary duties'.

[musemaj11]

They were including household spending in managing household finances.

In most households especially the traditional ones, women are usually the ones keeping track of all the expenses while the men only know how to make the money and leave the management of the household expenses to their wives since they are too lazy so they dont know anything. Thus this stereotype was born.

 

Many men are indeed like this but Im not. Since I was a kid I have always taken good care of my own personal finance.

 

It has nothing to do with the money and mostly to do with a woman demonstrating her appreciation for people who do things for her. For me, I'm picturing what she'll be like 5 years into a marriage.

Most people dont realize that even the first date speaks a lot about a person. A woman or a man who expects the other person to do one thing or another for her/him such as expecting to be paid for or expecting sex on a first date is not suddenly going to turn into a selfless considerate partner after 5 or 10 years. Chances are she/he is just going to get worse. Edited May 18, 2011 by musemaj11

[somedude81]

Women were also 56 per cent more likely to give up sex than men to pay off debts. However, when it comes to sex versus chocolate - chocolate wins. Women were less willing to give up chocolate and shopping (39 per cent) than they were sex and alcohol (16 per cent) to eliminate debt.

Huh? How would giving up sex eliminate debt?

[Woggle]

What it means is that men find it attractive when women are not materialistic.

[somedude81]

Would you want sex with your SO after an entire day of hooking?

 

At first I thought it was some sort of fishing joke, then.

[Titania22]

Now I understand why men like me so much.

 

I am like the opposite of what the study says though. I am much more upset by debt then I am by infidelity. And I mentally take note of how a date handles money, if he is spending for the sake of it, it is a warning sign. There is a difference between spending money on some fun activities as the mood strikes, and buying food you have no intention of eating.

 

I just guys guys would stop telling me I am a cheap date.

[thatone]

What if I am a pig who wants an appetizer, entree, and dessert?

 

move to new orleans, everyone has appetizer, entree, and dessert.

 

they would think you strange if you didn't.

 

Now I understand why men like me so much.

 

I am like the opposite of what the study says though. I am much more upset by debt then I am by infidelity. And I mentally take note of how a date handles money, if he is spending for the sake of it, it is a warning sign. There is a difference between spending money on some fun activities as the mood strikes, and buying food you have no intention of eating.

 

I just guys guys would stop telling me I am a cheap date.

 

from someone who is on that side of the fence, if you ever find yourself on a date with a wealthier man, there's not a whole lot you can read from that.

 

a couple/three hundred bucks for a dinner is really nothing in the grand scheme of things. whether they spend that or not in the span of a month on three or four dates is not gonna affect them one way or the other. nor is debt a good indicator. every entrepreneur has debt. probably lots of it, that's part of doing business. debt is a good thing for a person who owns their own business, actually. it is the height of foolishness to put your own money into business dealings. you never put your own money into business deals when you can borrow someone else's instead. in that case, debt is more cautious and risk averse than not having debt.

Edited May 18, 2011 by thatone

[Els]

Definitely. And as my bf puts it, 'Anyone can make themselves model-hot by spending a ton of money'.

 

Beauty costs money, for a woman. As long as the men agreeing with this agree with that, then we're all good. I have never personally known a very frugal woman who was also very hot, TBH. Can't have your cake and eat it too.

[Sanman]

Definitely. And as my bf puts it, 'Anyone can make themselves model-hot by spending a ton of money'.

 

Beauty costs money, for a woman. As long as the men agreeing with this agree with that, then we're all good. I have never personally known a very frugal woman who was also very hot, TBH. Can't have your cake and eat it too.

 

 

I'll disagree and tell you it depends on what you mean by hot. I find frugal women tend to be less made up and more t-shirt and jeans casual. Doesn't mean I don't find them hot. It just means I am less surprised at what I see first thing in the morning.

[one goal]

I'd want a girl who spends a lot of money on me. I wouldn't want to spend much on them however. Unless it's to impress them.

[Els]

I'll disagree and tell you it depends on what you mean by hot. I find frugal women tend to be less made up and more t-shirt and jeans casual. Doesn't mean I don't find them hot. It just means I am less surprised at what I see first thing in the morning.

 

It's great that you think so. I find many guys are attracted to long, smooth hair ($200 for treatments and chemical straightening and styling, at least), large smoky eyes (full set of makeup, perhaps $100?), clean-shaven pubes ($70 bikini wax), etc, without knowing exactly what goes into them.

 

I lived very frugally for the past 6 months, spending only $150 a week. During that time, I only bought 4 items of clothing, a winter coat because I didn't have one, a pair of sneakers to replace the only one I had which was falling apart, and two $10 t-shirts. I would NEVER have bought a good pair of heels (and cheap ones are horrible for your feet, period), or a makeup set (I could be replacing my 5-year old phone with that money!), or a good dress, when the money could be spent in better ways. Spending on beauty is completely contradictory to frugality, when it brings no other benefits. At least if you spend on a small car you get to use it, and if you spend on food you get to eat it.

 

Can most guys handle that sort of frugality? I doubt so.

[thatone]

It's great that you think so. I find many guys are attracted to long, smooth hair ($200 for treatments and chemical straightening and styling, at least), large smoky eyes (full set of makeup, perhaps $100?), clean-shaven pubes ($70 bikini wax), etc, without knowing exactly what goes into them.

 

EVERY woman these days has long straight hair and often too much eye makeup. every time i see one that has naturally curly/wavy hair and wears it well, i'm instantly more attracted to that. chemical straightening is well beyond silly. and on the same note, far too few women wear their hair short, i see lots of women that would look great with short hair, but are hooked on imitating the long straight hair of others.

 

a woman who looks different than other women in a room, but still attractive, is a good thing, imo.

 

imitation is not flattering for the imitator.

 

making what you have to work with work, on the other hand, is classy.

Edited May 18, 2011 by thatone

[Els]

EVERY woman these days has long straight hair and often too much eye makeup. every time i see one that has naturally curly/wavy hair and wears it well, i'm instantly more attracted to that. chemical straightening is well beyond silly. and on the same note, far too few women wear their hair short, i see lots of women that would look great with short hair, but are hooked on imitating the long straight hair of others.

 

a woman who looks different than other women in a room, but still attractive, is a good thing, imo.

 

imitation is not flattering for the imitator.

 

making what you have to work with work, on the other hand, is classy.

 

Eh, what women imitate usually sells well to the majority of the male population, which is why they're imitating it in the first place. It costs to look good, period. Whether it costs lots or just some $$ depends on the ingenuity and natural beauty of the woman in question, but it still does. And any $$ spent on looking good is $$ spent on insubstantial benefits, which is contradictory to the very nature of frugality. That's what I'm pointing out.

[thatdog]

It's great that you think so. I find many guys are attracted to long, smooth hair ($200 for treatments and chemical straightening and styling, at least), large smoky eyes (full set of makeup, perhaps $100?), clean-shaven pubes ($70 bikini wax), etc, without knowing exactly what goes into them.

 

I lived very frugally for the past 6 months, spending only $150 a week. During that time, I only bought 4 items of clothing, a winter coat because I didn't have one, a pair of sneakers to replace the only one I had which was falling apart, and two $10 t-shirts. I would NEVER have bought a good pair of heels (and cheap ones are horrible for your feet, period), or a makeup set (I could be replacing my 5-year old phone with that money!), or a good dress, when the money could be spent in better ways. Spending on beauty is completely contradictory to frugality, when it brings no other benefits. At least if you spend on a small car you get to use it, and if you spend on food you get to eat it.

 

Can most guys handle that sort of frugality? I doubt so.

 

Lol. When I complain about this on other threads I get girls telling me they DON'T do this for men, they do it for themselves/other girls....

 

I am more attracted to a girl in t shirt and jeans than one who obsesses about $200 hair styles and dresses etc.

 

Every time we have to go to a birthday party/wedding/anything my girlfriend stresses over having to go out shopping and spend more money on new clothes/jewellry/makeup/hair for every event. I tell her she looks great as is and she has a million dresses already that she could wear. She tells me it isn;t for me. She needs to look good for herself and it would be embarassing for her to be seen by the other girls wearing the same stuff she wore last time...

 

[Titania22]

 

from someone who is on that side of the fence, if you ever find yourself on a date with a wealthier man, there's not a whole lot you can read from that.

 

a couple/three hundred bucks for a dinner is really nothing in the grand scheme of things. whether they spend that or not in the span of a month on three or four dates is not gonna affect them one way or the other. nor is debt a good indicator. every entrepreneur has debt. probably lots of it, that's part of doing business. debt is a good thing for a person who owns their own business, actually. it is the height of foolishness to put your own money into business dealings. you never put your own money into business deals when you can borrow someone else's instead. in that case, debt is more cautious and risk averse than not having debt.

 

Good to know.

 

The funny thing is the people who I have most seen blow money, haven't been the rich, but rather the people on governement assistance, i.e. the people who should be the most careful with money.

 

As for a rich man, bring him on, I won't judge him, so long as he doesn't try to put his debt in my name everything will be fine.

In fact that would be cool, because as soon as my 'super powers' arrive, knowing a wealthy guy with a lair of high tech gadgets could be useful (assuming we are on the same side).

[Els]

Lol. When I complain about this on other threads I get girls telling me they DON'T do this for men, they do it for themselves/other girls....

 

I am more attracted to a girl in t shirt and jeans than one who obsesses about $200 hair styles and dresses etc.

 

Every time we have to go to a birthday party/wedding/anything my girlfriend stresses over having to go out shopping and spend more money on new clothes/jewellry/makeup/hair for every event. I tell her she looks great as is and she has a million dresses already that she could wear. She tells me it isn;t for me. She needs to look good for herself and it would be embarassing for her to be seen by the other girls wearing the same stuff she wore last time...

 

 

Oh, definitely, for some women it's a competition thing. The bf has mentioned being burned like that by an ex before; she barely had enough to eat so he gave her money, but she kept spending it on nice hair and clothes. He admitted that they made her look better, but he would rather she just have used the $$ to eat instead and he told her so repeatedly, but to no avail. He found it terribly frustrating and it put him off girly-girls quite a bit.

 

For every woman who does it for herself, there is another who does it because it gets her the men, though, although she may not admit it. After all, when a woman complains she isn't getting male attention, what is suggested to her? Work out, get nice clothes that complement her figure, get a style and wardrobe change. All of that takes money. Working out at least pays your gym membership fees back with good health, everything else doesn't.

[musemaj11]

Definitely. And as my bf puts it, 'Anyone can make themselves model-hot by spending a ton of money'.

 

Beauty costs money, for a woman. As long as the men agreeing with this agree with that, then we're all good. I have never personally known a very frugal woman who was also very hot, TBH. Can't have your cake and eat it too.

I have been 'shocked' by women who look so different once the makeup is off before.

 

So I know the deal. The more makeup a woman wears, the more she is trying to hide. I will avoid her like a plague.

[Sanman]

It's great that you think so. I find many guys are attracted to long, smooth hair ($200 for treatments and chemical straightening and styling, at least), large smoky eyes (full set of makeup, perhaps $100?), clean-shaven pubes ($70 bikini wax), etc, without knowing exactly what goes into them.

 

I lived very frugally for the past 6 months, spending only $150 a week. During that time, I only bought 4 items of clothing, a winter coat because I didn't have one, a pair of sneakers to replace the only one I had which was falling apart, and two $10 t-shirts. I would NEVER have bought a good pair of heels (and cheap ones are horrible for your feet, period), or a makeup set (I could be replacing my 5-year old phone with that money!), or a good dress, when the money could be spent in better ways. Spending on beauty is completely contradictory to frugality, when it brings no other benefits. At least if you spend on a small car you get to use it, and if you spend on food you get to eat it.

 

Can most guys handle that sort of frugality? I doubt so.

 

I think there are all levels of money that can be spent on beautification. I generally expect what I put in from a woman as well. I have a closet full of calvin klein, nautica, levis, lucky brand, as well as generics. I usually don't spend more than $25 on a single clothing item (shoes, jackets, suits can be an exception though they have been included) and look for good sales. Nobody but brand whores have ever complained that I don't look good. In fact, I usually get compliments on being well put together. I am more of a t-shirt and jeans guy and I prefer the same in a girl as I have come to find out after dating all types. I prefer a girl with light make-up. In fact, those girls usually look more attractive in the morning that the heavily made up ones. As for hair, I like straight hair, but like curls and have even been attracted to afros and such. Whatever looks good and is easily maintained works for me. The best fashion accessory I have found is a fit body. As a former personal trainer, I promise you that you can work out anywhere (I go to Planet Fitness for $10/mth or work out at home).

[thatone]

Good to know.

 

The funny thing is the people who I have most seen blow money, haven't been the rich, but rather the people on governement assistance, i.e. the people who should be the most careful with money.

 

As for a rich man, bring him on, I won't judge him, so long as he doesn't try to put his debt in my name everything will be fine.

In fact that would be cool, because as soon as my 'super powers' arrive, knowing a wealthy guy with a lair of high tech gadgets could be useful (assuming we are on the same side).

 

where do you live again?

 

seriously though, i agree on the people with little trying to look like they have a lot, i see that too.

 

the opposite of that is another good rule for business purposes, be wary of the guy sitting in the biggest office behind the best desk in plain clothes, he's smart enough to be doing something right, and that plain look is part of his game to get people to underestimate him. when everyone else comes and goes, he'll be the last one standing. if you hit it off with that guy you have something worth a little effort, he's a born winner.

 

one of the smartest guys i ever met with was a guy who ran a small town farmer's bank, who went to work in boots, jeans, and a polo shirt every day. every time you saw him he'd interrupt your first line of conversation and say "i'm poor and broke and ain't got no money for no deals" just like that, slang and all. but what you didn't know until you got his trust was that song and dance was just to ward off scheisters, he knew more about whatever business you were trying to borrow money for than you did. he had about a dozen 'spies' around the region in all other sorts of businesses that would feed him information about people such as how fast they paid their bills, if they ever tried to screw people over on contracts, if you went to the bars and drank too much, if anyone ever saw you at the horse track gambling, etc. he probably never had a bad loan in 30 years, and last i heard had retired a very wealthy man.

 

if one of them ever asked to put debt in your name, run fast. he's sinking and looking for someone to buy him another few months before he hits bottom. if you want the truth from a wealthier man after a few dates, when money discussion comes up ask him what kinda net worth he's talking about, that's the bottom line. he could very well have millions in debt, and be perfectly fine, as long as he has more millions in assets and plenty of cash flow to cover the debt.

Edited May 18, 2011 by thatone

[Star Gazer]

It has nothing to do with the money and mostly to do with a woman demonstrating her appreciation for people who do things for her.

 

And in my experience, that appreciation is best done with a sincere, heartfelt "thank you," not a tit-for-tat or splitting of expenses.