andi.54 Posted May 17, 2011 Posted May 17, 2011 I can't tell if something's wrong, or what to do about it if something is. I guess it's been bothering me more than I thought, though, or I wouldn't be here. I've been dating my boyfriend for almost a year now. In person, he's very loving. However, we won't be seeing each other as much for the next year, because I am transferring to a different university about an hour away. We've talked about it a lot and we're pretty secure in the idea that we'll stay together. But lately he's been distant and detached when we're not together, to the point where he hardly ever calls, and only talks to me for a short while over the phone before deciding he's done talking and hanging up. He doesn't answer my texts very often, when he used to always at least answer, even if it was a few hours late. Sometimes I'll be upset about something and I'll need to talk to him and he won't answer at all, even though that's when I really wish he would. I've tried talking to him about it several times but he doesn't seem to understand that there's an issue, or he doesn't want to acknowledge it. I'm trying to seem cheerful when I talk to him now and I'm hoping this will pass, but I don't know how it will if he can't understand that I feel ignored. I can't seem to get it across to him. When we're together, it's like nothing is wrong. He's suddenly the same loving person I've always known. It's the second we're not together that he shuts me out. I've been able to handle it lately, but knowing that I'll be transferring next year worries me. I don't want this to continue when I won't be seeing him as often. It's very confusing, having someone love you when they're with you and forget about you when you're not around. Sometimes I wonder if he even misses me. I don't understand. I can't tell if there is a problem or if it's just a phase, and if there is a problem I haven't the faintest idea what to do about it.
MistaDynamic Posted May 17, 2011 Posted May 17, 2011 Sounds like he's got other things going on on the side and when you leave for school after awhile he will dump you. A man won't answer texts from his women only a) she too clingy and he feels too pressured or b) he has another woman he interested in and is working on that relationship.
Author andi.54 Posted May 19, 2011 Author Posted May 19, 2011 He wouldn't cheat. And that's not a naive assumption. He's just not that type of person. There's also no one he would have the opportunity to cheat with. And I'm not clingy. If I am and just don't realize it, it's nothing new, and he would have said something a long time ago. I haven't changed one bit in the way I act towards him. He just checked out.
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