Fastone Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 I have been interested in a girl for several months. I go and see her at a club where she works. She has expressed quite a bit of interest in me-- touching my hair & arms, saying 'you're so sweet!', expressed interest in going to movies, we have talked about her coming over to my house, etc.. So I went to the club last night, and her Cousins came to see her. Now, they were talking about some other guy who is a bouncer at this club, as if he is her boyfriend. She told me that she doesn't have a boyfriend... And I heard one Cousin tell her "that other guy just looked at you", as if there is also another guy she's interested in, and it's not me. So anyway, I bought her family three rounds of drinks and three pool games, and at the end she looked at me strangely when I asked her to call me. Then I shook her Cousin's hands, and they all basically rolled their eyes when I said 'nice to meet you' with each of them... So I don't know what to think at this point. This girl is just a player ?
Fondue Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 I think you made a huge mistake by spending so much money of them. You more or less looked like a weasel buying attention and their time. I'm certain that they think MUCH less of you now. Maybe she was interested in you before, but now she's lost respect. If you treated her like a queen this quickly, you only look desperate-- Not material enough for her interests. Sorry for being brutally honest, but that's just the way it is. Also, I would never suggest dating within the working circle (or within the same college dorm hall, or classes, etc.) Think about it. If things go sour, do you really wanna continue to see that person in the same place you typically spend most of your days at? Really, come on now.
Author Fastone Posted May 15, 2011 Author Posted May 15, 2011 (edited) "Also, I would never suggest dating within the working circle (or within the same college dorm hall, or classes, etc.) Think about it. If things go sour, do you really wanna continue to see that person in the same place you typically spend most of your days at?" Hi, thank you. I don't work with her. I just visit her at work. And it's been 3 months that I've known her. I haven't treated her like a Queen overnight... Edited May 15, 2011 by Fastone
Feelin Frisky Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 I agree with fondue that you spent too much but I wouldn't draw as many negative conclusions. You can't know what's in any one's head right now and it really doesn't matter what these other "eye-rollers" think. You are interested in her. It's time for you to assert yourself in finding out if she's available to you or not. If she's a server in a club she could easily be giving you a wrong impression if you're free with your money. It's more than time to make sure you're not a sucker.
orion1010 Posted May 16, 2011 Posted May 16, 2011 I would not suggest dating a co-worker. this girl i work with dated half the department right next to ours. we can all see each other. dating and slept with them. I wonder what they all talk about when her name comes up. After all this, she tells me to never date a guy you work with. she feels very weird now. I dated a guy that I work with but he works in the next next building over. After the drama and fool he made of himself.. showing up drunk to our first date. I have a thread about him on here.. I had to delete him from facebook, block him from messenger at work b/c he wouldn't stop contacting me. If we worked in the same building and I saw him everyday, I would go crazy and be completly annoyed. It got to the point he was IMing my coworkers asking what is up with me. I stayed NC and he finally got the point after a few weeks. Don't do it! it's just too awkward. blah!
Darren Taylor Posted May 16, 2011 Posted May 16, 2011 1)You never buy drinks. That's desperate and too many women will accept them and not talk to you for the rest of the night. Don't spend a penny. 2)Never a date a co-worker. There's a saying "Never dip your pen in company ink". There's a reason for that.
this_is_mpr Posted May 16, 2011 Posted May 16, 2011 2)Never a date a co-worker. There's a saying "Never dip your pen in company ink". There's a reason for that. He's not dating a girl at his work, as the headline suggests. He's dating a girl by visiting her at her work. To OP: What is her position at the club? I'm assuming she's a bartender or dancer, and if that's the case then she makes money off tips. She might be acting flirty towards you and other guys for the $.
Darren Taylor Posted May 16, 2011 Posted May 16, 2011 If one doesn't take a risk then one won't lose but one won't profit. Take a risk elsewhere. If you go through with it and it doesn't work out, you can lose your job or be forced to look for another one. Worth the risk?
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