Kalinka Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 And flat out objectify them? I just invested my emotions into an a-hole(he's 24) who wanted to get with nearly every girl in sight and then go brag about it. And a bunch of other issues that just disgust me that I don't want to type up. It really makes me feel pessimistic about the male gender. I've also seen first handed how the guys around me treat women. I really don't want to sound so negative but it's hard not to at times.
Rinnix Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Not all men see women this way, you just had a bad apple. Keep searching for a keeper, the male gender isn't as bad as you think.
Author Kalinka Posted May 15, 2011 Author Posted May 15, 2011 Not all men see women this way, you just had a bad apple. Keep searching for a keeper, the male gender isn't as bad as you think. But do you know what the root of objectifying comes from? influences, etc?
Rinnix Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Some women come to the assumption that all men are players due to bad experiences. Some men assume that most women have an agenda due to bad experiences. When we see a woman in less then classy clothing, we assume that she's looking for intimacy. Some men will believe that if a woman is wearing a low cut top it's for men to look at her. We can't just go by assumptions. You had a bad apple, it was his character, not the male gender.
rayne05us Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 He sounds insecure to me...flirting to be honest is nothing but another form of an ego boost (not necessarily a bad thing, but it is what it is) but he's doing this ALL the time in front of you, he obviously has some insecurity issues and lack of respect for you. Not all men are like this but luckily for you, you went into this with open eyes so I would say it's time to say Adios!!!
collegeguy_24 Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Some women come to the assumption that all men are players due to bad experiences. Some men assume that most women have an agenda due to bad experiences. When we see a woman in less then classy clothing, we assume that she's looking for intimacy. Some men will believe that if a woman is wearing a low cut top it's for men to look at her. We can't just go by assumptions. You had a bad apple, it was his character, not the male gender. Perhaps one of the best statements ever written
NicoleM Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 I dated one of those men. I finally realized he was just a a-hole that didn't know how to respect women and now that I look back I am glad I am no longer dating him;) It also gave me a clear outlook on what to look out for the next time. Pay attention to red flags.......
orion1010 Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 If any ladies would like to chim in.. what are the RED FLAGS you've noticed in the past where men wanted a woman just for sex or have viewd you as a sex object?
Kari Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 If any ladies would like to chim in.. what are the RED FLAGS you've noticed in the past where men wanted a woman just for sex or have viewd you as a sex object? • Compliments that only go towards to my physical appearance. • Dates which only lead to staying indoors. "And this here is the bedroom." • Gives few details about themselves. • Uses pet names early on. "Hey baby, gorgeous, etc" • Pushing aside emotions, and conversations on deeper levels. • Avoids meeting friends and family, avoids introducing you. • A gut feeling - always follow your gut. These are just a few I know out of the top of my head, the list goes on. Of course this also depends on the person, many people who are not playing do encounter some of these listed.
NicoleM Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 (edited) If a guy wants to sexting he probably is a perv and is only interested in sex. If doesn't respect your decision to wait for a little while for sex he probably is only interested in sex and not a relationship. If a guy makes comments like you are the sexiest girl I have ever met he probably only wants to get into your pants and uses that line alot. If a guy never compliments you on your face or anything else but your boobs and butt he probably only wants sex or is a perv. Also if a guy uses the line short-term, long-term dating activity partners and casual sex on his dating website he probably is a player and not interested in a relationship also keyword Available he probably is sleeping around Edited May 15, 2011 by NicoleM
guy777 Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Trust me, this goes both ways. But yes men are more notorious for it given the traditional gender roles.
musemaj11 Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 (edited) And why do women see men as money objects? For every guy using a woman for sex, there is a woman using a guy for money. Edited May 15, 2011 by musemaj11
orion1010 Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 And why do women see men as money objects? For every guy using a woman for sex, there is a woman using a guy for money. Touche! I have never done so. I'm support myself financally but I do know of woman who have.
musemaj11 Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Touche! I have never done so. I'm support myself financally but I do know of woman who have. I kind of turn a blind eye when I hear about a guy using a woman for sex and run because chances are the guy pays for it if you know what I mean. But what outrages me is when I hear about a guy who uses a woman for both sex and money too! Guys like that are worse than animals. This happened to a friend of mine. She is a very kind girl who got totally taken advantage of by some degenerate filth.
Woggle Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Because quite honestly men tend to do better with women when we treat them this way. Men tend to treat women this way because it works. It's much less emotionally draining then treating a woman with love and respect only to have her be completely unattracted to you. If women responded more positively to men that respect and cherished the women in their lives more men would do it.
MissJoness Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 I'm annoyed with men this week. I've experienced men who treated women as sex objects. There is this one guy who lives in my apartment complex who is always making sexually charged comments to me, and I cannot stand him. I swear the next time I see him I am going to punch his effing lights out. He's so ugly and disrespectful to me, I hate how he keeps hitting on me.
SomewhatExperienced Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Why are women objectified? It's because the only story of a woman that really exists in mass media is of a sex object. Look at everything that uses women for advertising, their always attractive and often scantily clad. You never rarely see things about women that only feature their talents, or personality. If it does it's ALWAYS underlined by her being sexy and attractive Example: look at pictures of male athletes in magazine. You often see pictures of them playing their sport. Now look at women athletes. They're almost always doing a sexy pose, showing how hot they are. You almost never see a something that features them as purely an athlete, without them somehow being featured as a babe. This isn't really that bad because being a sexual being is a dimension of all men and women, it's just that in women's case it's often the ONLY dimension of her that's put forth. Women are to blame too. Pick up a Maxim magazine. What's in it? Pictures of hot girls. Now pick up a Cosmo. What's in it. Pictures of hot girls, basically telling them that they should look like this. Girls themselves objectify themselves. They've internalized the objectivity that society has put on them. Watch this. It's about music videos and how they shape our view of sexuality. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KZty9LeAxE This post was basically a re-authoring of this video clip.
Negative Nancy Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Why are women objectified? It's because the only story of a woman that really exists in mass media is of a sex object. Look at everything that uses women for advertising, their always attractive and often scantily clad. You never rarely see things about women that only feature their talents, or personality. If it does it's ALWAYS underlined by her being sexy and attractive Example: look at pictures of male athletes in magazine. You often see pictures of them playing their sport. Now look at women athletes. They're almost always doing a sexy pose, showing how hot they are. You almost never see a something that features them as purely an athlete, without them somehow being featured as a babe. This isn't really that bad because being a sexual being is a dimension of all men and women, it's just that in women's case it's often the ONLY dimension of her that's put forth. Women are to blame too. Pick up a Maxim magazine. What's in it? Pictures of hot girls. Now pick up a Cosmo. What's in it. Pictures of hot girls, basically telling them that they should look like this. Girls themselves objectify themselves. They've internalized the objectivity that society has put on them. Watch this. It's about music videos and how they shape our view of sexuality. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KZty9LeAxE This post was basically a re-authoring of this video clip. ain't that the truth! sadly.
shadowofman Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 I think we treat women as we would like to be treated. Or at least, I view women as sex objects because I would like to be an object of sex.
Negative Nancy Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 This is even more disturbing: In July, an American female college student lost a court case against the makers of a trashy reality show, Girls Gone Wild. She was videotaped dancing in a bar and when asked to remove her top, she repeatedly refused. So someone else removed it for her. Despite clearly saying ''no'' on camera, the jury decided the fact that she was at the bar meant she gave "implied consent". What is causing this erosion of women's rights is no mystery. It is, in fact, blatantly obvious. The cause is the way men view women - specifically, their abject and widespread failure to separate women from sex. Women are told to cover up to avoid the gaze of men. Warned that the mere sight of their skin can cause uncontrollable desire, for which the man cannot be blamed, they are not to walk alone at night, not drink too much, not stay out too late, not be in the company of men to whom they are not related. The message is clear: should you fail to heed these warnings, whatever happens to you is your fault. And the punishment is severe. Women's freedom is constricted, they are denied education, jobs, respect, and even killed because far too many men view them primarily as sexual objects. Whether that object is concealed beneath a burqa or exposed before a camera, the reason is the same - she is the physical embodiment of sex and, as such, is not worthy of a life independent of it. And herein lies the ultimate paradox: having reduced women to mere sex objects, these same men then despise women for having sex. Will this merry-go-round never end? http://www.smh.com.au/opinion/society-and-culture/too-many-men-still-see-women-as-sex-objects-20101019-16sgh.html#ixzz1MPwtFoPU Makes me hate all men. They should be punished much harder when comitting sex trafficking, raping and exploiting and they should be required by law to take a pill to reduce their libido.
sanskrit Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Because quite honestly men tend to do better with women when we treat them this way. Men tend to treat women this way because it works. It's much less emotionally draining then treating a woman with love and respect only to have her be completely unattracted to you. If women responded more positively to men that respect and cherished the women in their lives more men would do it. Yep, objectifying behavior is learned, not innate, for most people. For men and women both, in addition to being "learning what works" objectification is a defense mechanism against cruelty as often as not. Admittedly there is a possibility of a chicken and egg dilemma here, but the result is the same. If your choices of punishment for capricious cruelty and thoughtlessness are to be either objectified or put in stocks and whipped, which would you prefer? Of course I know it's -possible- that you personally have never been capricious and thoughtless in dealing with romantic attention, but we all have to bear some portion of original sin don't we?
sanskrit Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 It's because the only story of a woman that really exists in mass media is of a sex object. Whereas men are treated unduly in terms of lowest common denominators by the mass media and entertainment, another type of objectification. How many media messages concern good fathers, honest businessmen, capable husbands, kind gentlemen as opposed to deadbeat dads, corrupt businessmen, doltish inept husbands and violent abusers? The mass media, other than sports coverage, is targeted near wholly these days at women and the young because 1) women and the young consume more media than men, and 2) women and the young are more responsive to advertising than men, so the mass media images, objectifying or not, whether images of males or females, are that way because women and youth respond to them.
Ross MwcFan Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Because a lot of men (including myself), if not most, don't have to be attracted to a womans personality to want to sleep with them. All the woman needs to be is physically attractive. I really don't understand why women view that as so bad.
SomewhatExperienced Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 Because a lot of men (including myself), if not most, don't have to be attracted to a womans personality to want to sleep with them. All the woman needs to be is physically attractive. I really don't understand why women view that as so bad. It's because men like this (and yourself, sorry) are completely oblivious to this amazing aspect of sexuality and it ultimately undermines their respect for women as a whole. MOST men (I'm implying not all men are like this) aren't even aware of how much greater sex is when they've grown to know, care for and trust the woman they're having sex with. This intimacy is really what allows for the "magic" to happen in the bedroom. I'm saying this as a guy. I can see a hot chick walking down the street and think she'd be doable, but I also know the sex just wouldn't be as good. If I got to know her, like her and get comfortable her as a person before having sex then I'd know there's tons more potential there for mind boggling, passionate sex.
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