Winherback Posted May 14, 2011 Posted May 14, 2011 (edited) So my girl and I have had an off and on again relationship for almost 3 years now. We officially got back together 3 weeks ago and it was great. We agreed to really work on our communication, she agreed she was in it all the way and we would resolve everything as it came. Well, all great and we were doing so until last sat night. I met up with my sister that night and had a conversation with her about us talking again. I never told her that we were officially back together but hinted that was the way it was going. Basically I wanted to ease them back into it because of course they are my family and they only want to see me happy and not to get hurt. So I get home and mention it to my girl and she had a very negative reaction. Basically upset I didnt tell her that we were fully back together. I tried to explain it to her that I was just easing them into it,etc... and that I am sorry if it affected her and I didnt mean to,etc. So all week she has been distant still. Then on Thursday I finally ask her whats going on. Well, it all stemmed from what I said... then she said it got her thinking maybe we rushed into things, that she is on the fence again,yada, yada, yada. Even states that she loves me more than anything and that I have helped her become such a better person over the years, but that she is not wanting to jump my bones right now, etc. Sex spark is not there in other words. Yet, just a week ago in bed she mentioned how her heart was beating for me,etc. So we go to dinner on Thursday night, it was a bit awkward. She mentions that she is going to stick with this and fight and get through this unlike she would in the past. She would harp on the negatives, let them build up, then boom..... it would be a huge ordeal and we break up. So she mentions going places together for dinner next time, doing things together for the house,etc. But she is still distant. She hasn't been responding like we are really in a relationship. One point from the dinner is that I did admit I maybe dig at things like this too much and she said yes, that she needed more than 5 minutes to get over things like this. Still, how much distance should I give her? Was I way in the wrong for easing my family back into it? Or did she go overboard on this? Should I just keep playing it cool until this blows over? I guess with our history I think only the worse. Edited May 14, 2011 by Winherback
rayne05us Posted May 14, 2011 Posted May 14, 2011 Do you really want to keep going through this??? Do you want a healthy supportive relationship? If so, do you think she can ever give that to you?
Xyrodon Posted May 14, 2011 Posted May 14, 2011 Slow and steady my friend. I think us guys jump the gun too quickly on every frigging thing. At least you have her back. This shows that you mean A LOT to her because NO ONE else will get their ex girlfriend back, especially if the guy screwed up. Guys always come back, women never do (unless the screwed up, then they want a 2nd chance to make it right). Women will write this statement off as misogyny. I'm sorry but it's the truth. Just let the fact that men will ALWAYS like women who aren't fat, old or ugly, women don't look back, ever. Fight for that girl. You have a chance to win her heart back.
rayne05us Posted May 15, 2011 Posted May 15, 2011 I know this is a very hard time for you, and I can't tell you what do, but it might be in your best interest to take time and invest it in yourself and healing from this so you can move on. There IS someone out there who will love you and support you and is loyal, you're just so wrapped up in this (being her back up plan) that you probably don't see anyone else. Sometimes certains are fulfilling for us instead of having an actual healthy relationship. Like getting her to stay everytime and the whole chase/risk factor thing. If that's what you want, then so be it....but is that what you want? If you're not sure I suggest you stay far far away from her for now until you're sure.
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