Jump to content

How do you rid yourself of painful images of your ex having sex with their new bf/gf?

Glove_slap

By Glove_slap
in Breaks and Breaking Up

 Share
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Glove_slap Established Member

Glove_slap

Posted
Posted

For me its her new boyfriend. We were together for 3 years and broke up almost a year ago (In June) and almost immediately she got a new bf (4 weeks later).

It doesn't happen as much but I do get reminiscent about all the times we had together (we were each other's firsts) and it just pains me to know that those memories will never be re-lived and that some new guy is doing everything and maybe more with her..

 

How can I forget about her, I loved her truly.

lalalandman Established Member

lalalandman

Posted
Posted (edited)

Here's how...they WILL break up or fall out of love at some point. Love is a mothereffer dude. So do yourself a favor and go get some. Some lovely girl with nice legs wants you to spoon her. She's out there waiting for you to stop being a homo and go tag her.

Edited by lalalandman
poorguy Established Member

poorguy

Posted
Posted
Here's how...they WILL break up or fall out of love at some point. Love is a mothereffer dude. So do yourself a favor and go get some. Some lovely girl with nice legs wants you to spoon her. She's out there waiting for you to stop being a homo and go tag her.

 

Kind of an immature response, but at the same time kinda true...well completely true

 

Land o lakes guy...sorry I dont remember your user name, no offense....but you do have.a small point.....what you said is more of a shortcut then really good directions

lalalandman Established Member

lalalandman

Posted
Posted

shortcut? It's been a year for this guy and he's still screwed up. If a shortcut gets you to where you need to be in the end anyways, then what's the problem? He's doing someone out there a disservice. Some chick who will cusp his balls at night. Sorry, but maybe what he needs is a good friend who will flick his ballsack for him and wake it up rather than some douche who's going to Dr. Phil him through this episode.

rayne05us Established Member

rayne05us

Posted
Posted

Seriously, she doesn't sound like she's in your league. She doesn't sound loyal at all. Trust me the first is hard to get over, but it's not impossible. Just stay on here for support and honestly...don't give her the time of day!! NO CONTACT...you don't need someone like that in your life. You can do soooooo much better than some chick dealin with another dude weeks after...stay busy, focus on you and I promis you WILL get through this. Best of Luck!!

rayne05us Established Member

rayne05us

Posted
Posted

So what exactly is it that you DO want in a girl...not necessarily physical qualities, but personalty and other things you're looking for in a relationship??

skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

Posted
Posted

How can I forget about her, I loved her truly.

 

 

Unfortunately, there are wounds that may never heal, only time will tell

0hpenelope Established Member

0hpenelope

Posted
Posted
For me its her new boyfriend. We were together for 3 years and broke up almost a year ago (In June) and almost immediately she got a new bf (4 weeks later).

It doesn't happen as much but I do get reminiscent about all the times we had together (we were each other's firsts) and it just pains me to know that those memories will never be re-lived and that some new guy is doing everything and maybe more with her..

 

How can I forget about her, I loved her truly.

For me, whatever my ex does, I don't take it personally. It took a while to get to that mindset (and I still struggle from time to time, but not as much as I used to), but I'm there now and I'm not letting it go.

 

No, I don't know what he's doing or how he's been.

radiodarcy Established Member

radiodarcy

Posted
Posted

i too had a hard time trying to get the unpleasant images of my ex and his new flame having sex out of my head. finally, i stopped fighting it and just let them linger until they passed. of course it was incredibly painful to think about and my friends thought i was twisted for doing so.

 

but i found the more i tried to forget about him moving on, the more i dwelled on it. reverse psychology i guess. it's been two and a half months and these days those thoughts rarely ever cross my mind and if they do, they don't stick around long and to be honest, i think i'm getting past the point of caring anyway...

oldguy Established Member

oldguy

Posted
Posted
Unfortunately, there are wounds that may never heal, only time will tell

 

Scars remain but wounds will heal.

You never forget your first Subaru

Kodo Established Member

Kodo

Posted
Posted

Honestly I just avoid everything sexual in nature as best I can for now. Heck an adult video is enough to bring up images of the ex or her latest work... and those are terrible thoughts for anyone to think.

NSDNQ Established Member

NSDNQ

Posted
Posted

oh that all to familiar feeling that your going to vommit if your chest doesnt explode first.

 

that feeling goes away. the thoughts dont.

radiodarcy Established Member

radiodarcy

Posted
Posted
Honestly I just avoid everything sexual in nature as best I can for now. Heck an adult video is enough to bring up images of the ex or her latest work... and those are terrible thoughts for anyone to think.

 

*sigh* so true! i can't even look at a dirty movie without inserting (if you'll pardon the pun) my ex in the male role.

 

yeah i may be more or less over it - - but visual aids only act as an unhelpful trigger that i'd rather stay away from.

carhill Established Member

carhill

Posted
Posted

TBH, I've never experienced this issue, either with my exW or with any woman I've loved in an intimate way. Once I disconnect them, they don't exist. When in relationships or being married, I don't project my own self-image as a man making love with a woman upon their prior lovers, rather choosing to live in and appreciate the moment; this from someone who makes his living visualizing complex images in his minds-eye. IMO, it's about perspective. Choice. What will you choose today?

Kodo Established Member

Kodo

Posted
Posted
TBH, I've never experienced this issue, either with my exW or with any woman I've loved in an intimate way. Once I disconnect them, they don't exist. When in relationships or being married, I don't project my own self-image as a man making love with a woman upon their prior lovers, rather choosing to live in and appreciate the moment; this from someone who makes his living visualizing complex images in his minds-eye. IMO, it's about perspective. Choice. What will you choose today?

 

Exactly, this is where it's helpful to have friends who you're not sexually involved with, but still find attractive. Because if you fabricate an image of them the first real thought that comes to mind is "who cares, not my business". And the same really applies to your ex before and after you, obviously it's just harder to accept that, hence why the above helps.

Art_Critic Established Member

Art_Critic

Posted
Posted

Go have sex with another girl.. those images will be gone in 60 secs.

Art_Critic Established Member

Art_Critic

Posted
Posted
Scars remain but wounds will heal.

You never forget your first Subaru

 

So true on both counts.....

plasma Established Member

plasma

Posted
Posted
Go have sex with another girl.. those images will be gone in 60 secs.

 

i like this !

Kodo Established Member

Kodo

Posted
Posted
Go have sex with another girl.. those images will be gone in 60 secs.

 

You'd think with all the freedom to do so this would be a great solution. But the sex in my previous relationship was great. The lack of relationship really kills the libido. :/

 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...