51% of American Women are Living without a Spouse.

[musemaj11]

Turning point in US as more women choose not to marry

 

 

• The institution of marriage in America is in serious decline, and a slim majority of women now live without a spouse, new census data show.Some 51% of women above the age of 15 were living without a spouse in 2005, a sharp rise from the 35% who were on their own in 1950, the halcyon days of the American family, the census data says.
  "The institution of marriage that has been written down legally and that used to be the support for women - emotionally, financially - is not something they want to take to as lightly or as early as they had in the past," said William Frey, a demographer at Brookings Institution.
  "They are much more likely to be cautious about getting into that situation."
  Of the more than 117 million American women above the age of 15, 63 million are married, according to an analysis of the data that appeared in yesterday's New York Times.
  Some 3.1 million of these women are legally separated and 2.4 million women are married to husbands who are not actually living at home because of work or other obligations.
  That reduces the number of women living with a spouse to 57.5 million, compared with 59.9 million women who live without a spouse or whose spouses were not living at home when the survey was taken in 2005.
  Some of the women had simply outlived their husbands, a demographic pattern that has been a constant for some time.
  But Mr Frey said the new data was evidence that a tipping point had been reached in American society. Marriage is no longer the social norm.
  Amid the tumult of the 1960s and 1970s, the institution of the family was a focus of baby boomers' rebellion.
  Forty years later, that backlash and the growing economic independence of women, have produced a generation of women who see choices other than marriage.
  They were raised to make their own living, and to be accepting of the prospect of living with a partner outside marriage - even though such unions do not provide the same legal and financial protections.
  Men and women are waiting until they are well into their 30s to marry, or may choose to live together instead. In 1950, some 42% of women below the age of 24 were married; by 2000, the figure had fallen to 16%, the census data found.
  Even those a few years older appear to be in no rush to the altar. The proportion of married women between the ages of 25 and 34 fell to 58% in 2000 from 82% in 1950.
  Those women who do marry and go on to divorce take longer to remarry than men, or may choose to live with a partner without being legally married.
  Figures showing the declining incidence of marriage were even more pronounced among African-American families, with only 30% of women living with a spouse.
  Among more recently established communities in the US, the marriage rates were higher, with 60% of Asian woman living in married households.
  The fifties version of family life was in itself an aberration.
  The fifties were the heyday of married life, with a rush to pair up and procreate that was in part a function of postwar optimism and economic boom.
  In the years since then, demographers say that social forces have created a society where women no longer need to rely on husbands for financial support, and where there is increasing scepticism about the institution of marriage.
  That combination of trends has created a society where people spend roughly half of their adult life alone - a solitary state that in earlier years would have been the norm only during times of immense upheaval, such as wartime.
  Mr Frey acknowledged that while the rebellious baby boomers may have led the drift away from marriage, their children and grandchildren when they come of age may have a different approach.
  But he said: "I don't think we are ever going to go back to the 1950s. That dominant social norm is gone forever."
   
  http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2007/jan/17/usa.population
  

Its funny how they try to spin the reason behind the phenomenon as if it were women themselves who made the decision not to marry. I mean since when women are the ones who dont want to get married? Thats as ridiculous as claiming that men dont want sex.

 

But we all know the real reasons why there are less and less marriages.

 

1) Its because thanks to modern mass media, the newer generations of men have smarten up and realized that getting married is a bad life decision and refuse to let themselves bound into financial and sexual slavery.

 

2) Women are getting wealthier yet they still want men who have better status than them so they are all fighting for the same few men above their own status - men who ironically are the wariest when it comes to marriage due to fear of not only jeopardizing their lifetime assets, but also limiting their options when they can have all the women they want as a single man.

 

I say well done boys!

Edited May 12, 2011 by musemaj11

[xxoo]

since when women are the ones who dont want to get married?

 

Since this happened:

 

Women are getting wealthier

[Stung]

Two close friends of mine live with their partners of several years, both of whom have asked them to marry, and the women decided not to. I also know several women who have been divorced and refuse to ever marry again. It's not that weird, a lot of women get trounced emotionally and financially in divorce, just as many men do.

 

I have to say, having read a lot of your commentary--I honestly think it's sad, the skewed lenses you seem to view every human dynamic through.

[sally4sara]

I have to say, having read a lot of your commentary--I honestly think it's sad, the skewed lenses you seem to view every human dynamic through.

 

The OP often makes me think of what my husband said about my son hitting puberty; that teenage girls are to teenage boys, something both terrible and amazing. Some people never move past this stage and the female gender remains something akin to Genghis Khan, driving all their thoughts and actions through a filter of fear. We will never be as powerful in real life as we are in the minds of people like the OP.

 

And I've come to enjoy his contributions on LS because sometimes its fun to toy with the identity of the Big Bad Wolf making all the huddled piggies inside tremble at your might. Especially when you don't have to put any guilt enducing effort into achieving it.

[TaraMaiden]

Yes, he makes skewed, very often completely unestablished comments, then when someone pulls him up on it - he can't actually come up with any sound reasoning....just his own tinted bias and prejudice.

[2sure]

I think it shows that Sure, women still would like to get married but they are now more willing and able to be spouse-less. Getting married is no longer the main goal it once was.

[carhill]

So, after having three spouses, my exW became one of the 51% and lives with someone outside of the state of marital bliss in the home she got from her third ex-husband. I say 'good show'.

 

As a child of the 50's, I would have not existed if my father's first wife hadn't got caught up in all that wartime optimism and left him with his daughters while he had a rifle in his hand, shacking up with a man who somehow avoided military service, thus joining the 51%. I say 'good show'

 

My mother outlived my father by 26 years and never remarried nor cohabited subsequently and thus became one of the 51%. I say 'good show'.

 

One datapoint.

Edited May 12, 2011 by carhill

[Holding-On]

The institution of marriage in America is in serious decline, and a slim majority of women now live without a spouse, new census data show.Some 51% of women above the age of 15 were living without a spouse in 2005, a sharp rise from the 35% who were on their own in 1950, the halcyon days of the American family, the census data says.

 

Um yeah, I think that the 50s marked the "halycon days" of teenage love and marriage. Most people marry for the first time at considerably older than 15! Why doesn't this study at least look at adult women?

 

I for one sincerely hope that the vast majority of males and females from 15 to 22 are NOT married already.

[nordic]

It also says the study includes women over the age of 15 (or did it include 15?). Back in the 50's, it was common for people to marry earlier. I doubt very seriously we have many 15 and 16 year olds wanting to get married these days. I would imagine that's part of the discrepancy right there. How much does that younger age group represent?

 

In any event, marriage is not what it used to be in the eyes of much of society. Living together instead of marriage is pretty well accepted. I wouldn't necessarily say that it's attributed to men not wanting to marry (although some is), but also reflects that women have more choices today and aren't forced to stay in bad marriages because they're financially dependent.

 

true. and then women play around more, and get a sexual history before they settle down, which makes it much harder for them to find a man who wants to marry them and not just screw them.

[Skump]

Pro Tip: For the love of God, NEVER take statistics like these at face value. The statistics on marriage used as article fodder in the mainstream media notoriously misleading - a constant source of tragi-comic amusement for sociologists and statisticians.

 

The bottom line is that these stats are siphoned off grotesque blends of cohorts it makes no sense to mix. The terrifying divorce rate stats, for instance, are derived by mixing people who came of age during the 1970s (divorce frenzy!) with young people today, who tend to marry a bit later in life (THIS IS PROBABLY A GOOD THING). Then you have the conflation of income levels, race, education level, failure to account for female life expectancy... blech... horrible.

[nordic]

Pro Tip: For the love of God, NEVER take statistics like these at face value. The statistics on marriage used as article fodder in the mainstream media notoriously misleading - a constant source of tragi-comic amusement for sociologists and statisticians.

 

The bottom line is that these stats are siphoned off grotesque blends of cohorts it makes no sense to mix. The terrifying divorce rate stats, for instance, are derived by mixing people who came of age during the 1970s (divorce frenzy!) with young people today, who tend to marry a bit later in life (THIS IS PROBABLY A GOOD THING). Then you have the conflation of income levels, race, education level, failure to account for female life expectancy... blech... horrible.

 

ok, agree. but it still says something. namely that half of the female population is up for grabs. just go oyut and groop them:-)

[musemaj11]

Since this happened:

Lol, wealthy women are no less desperate for marriage than poor women. From 16 year old girls to 60 year old women they all have the same basic fantasy.

[musemaj11]

It also says the study includes women over the age of 15 (or did it include 15?). Back in the 50's, it was common for people to marry earlier. I doubt very seriously we have many 15 and 16 year olds wanting to get married these days. I would imagine that's part of the discrepancy right there. How much does that younger age group represent?

Um yeah, I think that the 50s marked the "halycon days" of teenage love and marriage. Most people marry for the first time at considerably older than 15! Why doesn't this study at least look at adult women?

 

I for one sincerely hope that the vast majority of males and females from 15 to 22 are NOT married already.

Are you guys like serious?

 

Read the article again and try to comprehend it properly.

 

It says 51% of all women ABOVE the age of 15. It means all women from the age 16 to all women who are close to dead. It does not say women who are 15! DUH!

[musemaj11]

Yes, and I stated over age 15 and then questioned if it included 15 since I didn't quote the OP to re-read it. Regardless, my point still stands. From the age of 16-18 and perhaps a couple of years above that...marriage was much more common in the 50's than now. It will skew the data because the trend is different today.

How does that skew the data?

 

It says 51% of all women above the age of 15 are unmarried, not just 16-18 year olds.

 

So, after having three spouses, my exW became one of the 51% and lives with someone outside of the state of marital bliss in the home she got from her third ex-husband. I say 'good show'.

 

As a child of the 50's, I would have not existed if my father's first wife hadn't got caught up in all that wartime optimism and left him with his daughters while he had a rifle in his hand, shacking up with a man who somehow avoided military service, thus joining the 51%. I say 'good show'

 

My mother outlived my father by 26 years and never remarried nor cohabited subsequently and thus became one of the 51%. I say 'good show'.

 

One datapoint.

I wonder how many of the unmarried women are divorcees who made off with half their ex-husbands money and refuse to remarry again in order to protect their 'stolen' assets being stolen by someone else. Edited May 14, 2011 by musemaj11

[musemaj11]

What about women who might be living with a man but not actually their "spouse"?

And what are the chances that in such relationships the couples are not married simply because the guys refuse to get married?

 

Thats my whole point that these days marriages are declining because more and more men have smarten up and refuse to marry.

Edited May 14, 2011 by musemaj11

[musemaj11]

Do I really have to spell this out? In the 1950's, the average age of a bride was 20.4 years old, with 47% of the brides being married before age 19. Today, the average age of a new bride is 25.3. The study HAS to include women over the age of 15 because almost half of women were marrying between the ages of 16-18 by 1959. Today, women are waiting much later to marry so including women of such a young age in the comparison TODAY skews the data. It's not the norm to marry between the ages of 16-18 as it was in the 50's so it's not a relevant comparison.

If the equation includes all ages above 15, then how does it matter if women now are marrying at 30 instead of 18? The result will still be the same.

 

Then you also have to consider life expectancy then versus today, women and men. Exactly how many women represented in this data were widowed? And how many more widows are there today versus then?

 

If you want to believe that numbers are as they are because men are choosing not to marry, that's your choice. But if you want to debate that, then come up with something that shows THAT as the cause...not some study that doesn't even allude to that.

As I acknowledged to Carhill before as a response, I wonder if some portion of the unmarried women are divorcees who refuse to remarry because they dont want someone else to steal the stolen assets they got from their ex-husbands.

 

But come on now, more and more couples are cohabitating for long term. Who do you think made the decision not to marry in such relationships? The women? Yeah right. Even in this very thread you can only see women whining, "Is he ever going to marry me?" not the other way around. Negative view of marriage among males is pretty widespread these days. Even Simon Cowell publicly said that he is never going to marry because its just not worth it.

[nordic]

I don't have the ability to graph this for you on this forum, and without that visual, I don't think you're going to understand what I'm saying.

 

In Texas, what you have prior to a marriage (what you bring to it) is considered separate and personal assets so that theory doesn't hold water here. In other states, perhaps. I am not educated on their laws.

 

Obviously you have some women who are with men who aren't wanting to marry. In my case, I've been proposed to a few times by different men and said no. My H asked me a few times before I said yes. So at least from my perspective and personal experience, your belief hasn't proven to be true. I also got married for the second time at the age of 40, and I've never been struck by lightening so go figure

 

nothing blends as well as men presenting statistics and women mentioning samples:-) logic versus...female something...

[xxoo]

How does that skew the data?

 

It says 51% of all women above the age of 15 are unmarried, not just 16-18 year olds.

 

nothing blends as well as men presenting statistics and women mentioning samples:-) logic versus...female something...

 

You guys may want to ask a statistics teacher to explain the statistics to you....a male statistician, of course.

[Eclypse]

Well folks, when you're right 51% of the time, you're wrong 49% of the time!

[nordic]

You guys may want to ask a statistics teacher to explain the statistics to you....a male statistician, of course.

 

maybe:-) but i do know what a sample is, which puts me way ahead of the female way of dealing with statistics.

[soserious1]

I'm living without a spouse because my lawyer informs me I won't be able to retire if I'm stuck paying alimony to another ex-husband

[musemaj11]

I'm living without a spouse because my lawyer informs me I won't be able to retire if I'm stuck paying alimony to another ex-husband

Why would you wanna remarry again after getting screwed financially by previous marriage anyway?

 

Unlike wealthy men who keep remarrying over and over, usually it takes wealthy women one divorce to learn that marriage is just a financial scam.

[Mme. Chaucer]

OP, why post an article just to debunk its premise (that women are not married because they no longer have the socio-economic need, to the same extent as in the past, for the financial support provided by the institution of marriage); then turn around and vehemently defend that article's stated statistics?

 

We understand that you cling to a belief that women are unmarried because men are "refusing" to marry them. Carry on with that, if you need to ... though I don't understand why. Lots of people believe all kinds of outlandish things. I think the truth would be preferable. That's me, though.

 

The Internet is crawling with articles that support your bias, like this one:

 

http://www.intellectualconservative.com/2007/11/13/advice-to-young-men-do-not-marry-do-not-have-children/

 

Why didn't you choose to post one of these?

[xxoo]

Unlike wealthy men who keep remarrying over and over, usually it takes wealthy women one divorce to learn that marriage is just a financial scam.

 

Are you arguing that women are smarter than men?

 

This is exactly what we've been saying. Financially independent women are less likely to seek marriage--first marriage, or subsequent marriages.

 

Many women still are wanting to marry. But the trend is that, as women's incomes increase, fewer women are seeking marriage.

 

You want the lower marriage rates to be about men refusing to marry, but--like you say--even the wealthy men marry again and again. Is it really that hard to believe that the decreasing rates of marriage is due to women refusing to marry?

[nyrias]

Living without being married or being loved is a waste of life. True love is when you marry someone.

 

a) True love is a very different thing from marriage. Otherwise, the divorce rate won't be so high.

 

b) There are plenty to life than being married/love. For example, doing important work.