hopeful2011 Posted May 12, 2011 Posted May 12, 2011 [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]What I’ve read, it’s usually the ‘dumper’ that moves on 1st but that’s not the case here. I am the ‘dumper’ and it has been 5 months since the relationship ended. And I am not willing or ready emotionally to go into a new relationship yet he’s been in one for over 2 months now. And no, I DO NOT WANT to get back together with him – when it ended, it was over.[/FONT][/sIZE] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]After the relationship ended, starting the day after it ended, for over 2 months (I’ll call it month 1 and 2), he texted & emailed me on a daily basis until I couldn’t take it anymore so I said that I wanted no more contact. It was interfering with my work as he’d communicate with me there, which I didn’t find appropriate. He’d tell me I was in his thoughts, how he missed me and how he had loved me. But 3 weeks later (I’ll call it month 4), he communicates with me at work. He says that he wants to be friends at the very least and how he missed having me in his life. Yet in month 4, I find out he’s been seeing someone since the middle of month 3 (they are still together). As we are in month 5, he writes to me saying again saying he thinks I am a fabulous, wonderful, interesting, caring, kind person. He’s always enjoyed having me being in his life and as I should know it, it was his desire that we find a way to keep each other in our respective lives. That is his wish.[/FONT][/sIZE] [FONT=Calibri][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]I will be giving him the no contact request in a couple of days. But I really don’t get why he has written to me what he has when he’s in a new relationship. Does he really want a friendship with me? How would that work when he’s with another woman – I don’t think the other woman would appreciate this ‘friendship’ either.[/FONT][/sIZE] [FONT=Calibri][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]I don’t get it, so I’m hoping someone can shed some light… Just trying to understand. Thanks![/FONT][/sIZE]
Blueberry7691 Posted May 13, 2011 Posted May 13, 2011 [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]What I’ve read, it’s usually the ‘dumper’ that moves on 1st but that’s not the case here. I am the ‘dumper’ and it has been 5 months since the relationship ended. And I am not willing or ready emotionally to go into a new relationship yet he’s been in one for over 2 months now. And no, I DO NOT WANT to get back together with him – when it ended, it was over.[/FONT][/sIZE] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]After the relationship ended, starting the day after it ended, for over 2 months (I’ll call it month 1 and 2), he texted & emailed me on a daily basis until I couldn’t take it anymore so I said that I wanted no more contact. It was interfering with my work as he’d communicate with me there, which I didn’t find appropriate. He’d tell me I was in his thoughts, how he missed me and how he had loved me. But 3 weeks later (I’ll call it month 4), he communicates with me at work. He says that he wants to be friends at the very least and how he missed having me in his life. Yet in month 4, I find out he’s been seeing someone since the middle of month 3 (they are still together). As we are in month 5, he writes to me saying again saying he thinks I am a fabulous, wonderful, interesting, caring, kind person. He’s always enjoyed having me being in his life and as I should know it, it was his desire that we find a way to keep each other in our respective lives. That is his wish.[/FONT][/sIZE] [FONT=Calibri][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]I will be giving him the no contact request in a couple of days. But I really don’t get why he has written to me what he has when he’s in a new relationship. Does he really want a friendship with me? How would that work when he’s with another woman – I don’t think the other woman would appreciate this ‘friendship’ either.[/FONT][/sIZE] [FONT=Calibri][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]I don’t get it, so I’m hoping someone can shed some light… Just trying to understand. Thanks![/FONT][/sIZE] Hi. I am also the dumper and I also have not moved on after 4 1/2 months broken up. Sounds like your ex still loves you even though he has a new gf. If you're not ready for a friendship with him, then don't do it. It will only set you back. Stick with NC (I have my own issues trying to stick with it). Good luck & keep posting.
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