heartbroken555 Posted May 11, 2011 Posted May 11, 2011 Im tired of thinking about her, tired that all my energy is going towards those thoughts and that im not able to concentrate on my work, lost inspiration ( im a video editor, director) and lost my ability to enjoy my life. I dont get it, how can someone who has been with you over a year, who tells you everyday they love you, and that they never loved anyone like this before, and that you are the love of their life, and that they would never leave you, just dump you out of nowhere after a silly fight ( about me giving her a ride) and the only reason they gave you was : Im unhappy, and i dont love you anymore. Thinking back on the relationship, this girl has pretty much destroyed my self confidence, she was never happy, it was never enough, and she would constatly disrespect me and belittle me.Then one day, the final blow, shes gone ! for a while she keeps in touch, and she promises me to see me , but keeps pushing the meeting further each time, till she finally meets a guy, and tells you shes done and to move on. And that maybe one day when you move on, we could meet ???? I dont get it. After reading alot on this forum and on the net, i realise that my ex has some of the following issues : narcissistic, a bit of GIGS, unable to maintain a healthy relationship, unable to be single, REBOUNDS, and just being a young and dumb club/party animal. Since she left me, all she has been doing is clubbing and dressing real sexy and dating guys. I always treated her with respect and like a queen. I wasnt too much of a nice guy, but hey i did love her, and i guess i didnt put her back in her place when she would cross my bounderies. One of the reasons she mentionned to her friends for leaving me, was because it got boring, and that she felt she couldnt breath anymore. What boyfriend do you know who lets his chick go out clubbing with the girls every week end and not say anything ??? ME !!! how could she say, i didnt let her breath and i was choking her ??? She did whatever she wanted !!! I guess looking back at the relationship, it started out AMAZING, but after the first 6 months, she started treating me like ****, and always made me feel responsible for everything wrong in the relationship, and destroyed my self-esteem, and broke up, without any prior warning and without even sitting down to have a mature talk about what was bothering her. Just one day before she left, she told me i was the most amazing thing to happen to her, and 2 weeks before dumping me, i moved 30 miles away from where i use to live and grew up, to be closer to her ( 2 streets away) and then she dumps me ?? Why didnt she tell me she wasnt sure about the relationship before i moved and spent money for nothing, and then find myself far from my familly and friends, and single... I have been in NC for about a month now, and we have been broken up for 4 month now. everyday i cant stop thinking about her, and i have trouble moving on, why do i still love her ??? why am i giving her all these thoughts when clearly she doenst give a **** about me or my feelings, and has no remorse ?? How can you just jump out from one relationship to the other and not even look back ???? I didnt even have a chance to tell her all of this, the last thing i told her was that i wish her good luck and kept it diplomatic, when in fact i just wanted to tell her how much i hate what she has done to me.... I need to move on, but im not able to, im thinking about talking to a therapist because all my friends and familly are tired of me talking about this subject. I just dont understand.... did she even love me at all ?? or did she just play with my head ??? im ****ed up !! i need help...
CiCi Posted May 11, 2011 Posted May 11, 2011 Hi... I think you should write a letter of what you want to tell her. Feel the emotions as you are writing. And don't type it... Write it. Cry if you need to, get angry, dont hold yourself back. After you have written the letter, leave it alone for a few days and when you feel emotionally strong on a specific time of a day, read the letter again and see how you feel.
BlindRage Posted May 11, 2011 Posted May 11, 2011 My ex dumped me after 2 1/2 of telling me she loved me more than anything in the world. The roller-coaster of emotions reach an all time low for some months to come, the good news is...... It gets better. I swear
stopthemadness Posted May 11, 2011 Posted May 11, 2011 Hi ,so sorry for your pain and heart ache. We've all been there and i know you've heard it before. But it will get better. Let time heal your broken heart. Because want it to or not it will. The writting a letter thing sounds good. But dont read it later on down the road. Later on down the road burn it, and let it all go. Iam gona say this next thing because I think you need to hear it K. Your exgirlfriend. she sounds dirty and nasty and if I were you Id go get tested for STDs. Am being real right now.(just think about it) Ok now lets talk about the therapist thing. Its a good idea!! Am 9 months out of breakup and 3 1/2 months of no contact. Am been seeing a therapist for 7 months. I see her every two weeks and yes it helps ALOT!! see i was like you. My family and friends just couldnt hear one more word of it. So I feel you on that. Stop blaming yourself for anything, the breakup, her leaving you all of it. Maybe she was fake right from the start. And maybe the real "her" her true colors just came out as you got to know her. You moved 30 miles from home to be with her. Thats not far at all. Just move back. Hang in there it gets better. Keep posting it helps...Theres a chat line on here too. Its called On Line Chatting To Cope. Check it out.........
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