scoutfinch123 Posted May 10, 2011 Posted May 10, 2011 Slightly long, but pls read My BF and I broke up around 7 months back..we had been in a relationship for around 7 months, and it was very good while it lasted - we were committed, spoke daily, met regularly and hardly ever fought. What did us in was that both of us wanted to stay on 2 different continents, and had differing views on marriage. I wanted us to get married when the time was right (say 6 months - a year) while he was sure he wanted at least another 2 years..and was not willing to make it formal in any way before that time (he didnt want to change the status of facebook even, forget meeting my parents). When we broke up, he said he and i were in different places in life..and he needed to find his feet (we are both in our late 20s, and i earn more than him, though that didnt bother him). He broke up with me, but was very sensitive about the whole thing. He also seemed very confused - he kept telling me as much (along with a lot of "i love you"s thrown in from his side). Like he was very scared to be doing this, but was doing it anyway. Needless to say, I was very heart broken, and took a long while to get back on track. I dont know if i still have completely. It seemed to have affected him a lot too - we spoke a month later, and for an hour or so. Me asking him to give us another chance, and him saying he couldnt. He finally messaged after the call saying i am not the right person for you, and you will find someone. I was totally NC before this conv (he had wanted to be friends, but I rejected that idea). We've had 2 email conversations after that - simple hello-how are yous. But these days, I find him visiting my profile on a netowrking site very often. He averages about once a fortnight. I didnt call him on his bday though i remembered it (and had mentioned it in one of our email convs) and that seemed to have hurt him. Each time he visits my profile, I find myself going through all those emotions all over again - and be a little hopeful (which is a feeling i dont want to have). I realize he is confused still, and may not come back as this will involve compromise on his part on the marriage and location bits. But i cant help feeling hopeful. I dont want to feel this way. but the truth is, i still feel for him. i dont know what to do.
rayne05us Posted May 10, 2011 Posted May 10, 2011 Well one of you is going to have to compromise. If you want to get back together, maybe it should be you who moves where he wants. Putting a deadline isn't so important as having a healthy relationship like you said you did. Would your rather wait and make sure this will work or just get married to get married? My friend live in the US all her life and fell in love in London. They stayed for 6 years and now they are BOTH moving back to the US....sometimes, it doesn't matter where you are.
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