how should i handle boyfriend talking to ex-wife?

[waiting2xhale]

Please advise me on this. I have been with my bf for 5 1/2 years and have been dealing with him talking to ex-wife for this long now also. They don't have any kids together. They were married 26 yrs. ago and was only married for 2yrs. According to him, they had split due to each of them having an affair but they had remained friends since then. When I first started dating him, I knew about their friendship. I didn't take it personal until I realized how often she was calling him (every other month, every holiday, or just to socialize). He would never pick up the phone if I was in his house when she called. I confronted him about this and his excuse was he just didn't feel like talking to her at the time but eventually he admitted that he didn't want to stir up any uncomfortable feelings on my part. Year after year, I got suspicious and found out that she was calling him behind her husband's back. She would also send him pictures of her kids during xmas time. I asked him why she was calling him without her husband knowing and he just said he didn't care why as long as he made it known to me that they are still in contact. I found out later that her husband was the man she had an affair with and left my bf for. I got angrier and full of resentment over the years always wondering why they are still in contact secretly and has no kids together. It became an argument over time and I've put up with him telling me that they are just friends and that he would never tell her to stop calling him and it was up to me how i was going to deal with it. that hurt like crazy but still i stayed with him, kissed his butt, apologizing for doubting him. i thought over time i would learn more about their friendship, would learn to understand it and accept it. but it just never felt right. he said they haven't seen each other for about 8yrs now but yet she continues to call him. he denies ever having to call her because she's always the one calling but i do believe that he calls her on her b-days/holidays too or whenever. after several arguments about her, i decided to break up with him and told i wasn't gonnal deal with that drama in my life. he convinced me to stay with him still by telling me he was gonna tell her to stop calling unless it was an emergency. i decided to compromise with him and stayed. but this year, i found out again that she has been calling him at work and that she has now broken up with her husband and has a bf. first he said she just left a msg on his voicemail at work to tell him happy b-day but after repeatedly questioning him, he ended up telling me that they had talk for less than 5min. about her new life which i think is total bs. i just feel like he is lying to me all the time about her. on mother's day, i felt so uneasy all day because i just knew he had called her for mother's day and just wondered what they had talked about. I have never heard them have a conversation on the phone. I lost it on mother's day and told him i couldn't deal with him still talking with her, that i believe he can't move forward with me because of her. he hardly has ever told me he loved me. i have always had a hard time trusting him because there are things about him that has always made it difficult for me. I also been cheated on myself from ex-husband whom i was married to for 16 yrs. so my bf and i broke up on mother's day. he again called me a fool and told me i will never trust any man, that i will never change, that it's me with the problem, that if she wants to call him on her birthday, etc. that it's okey. am i wrong for feeling the way that i do????

[Datura]

No. He can't be trusted, shows you minimal affection, is disrespectful, would rather keep his ex wife in the picture than tend to your needs. Don't allow him inside your head.