quietGuy13 Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 From what i read in dating websites and just what i hear in real life. Most guys that live with their parents ..the girls think it's stupid. and immature. Although in other countries is totally ok, in America it seems to be looked down upon. I live with my (damn) parents and they control me like a baby. Can i ever get a Girlfriend in this condition or do i have to move out first?
krz12 Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 From what i read in dating websites and just what i hear in real life. Most guys that live with their parents ..the girls think it's stupid. and immature. Although in other countries is totally ok, in America it seems to be looked down upon. I live with my (damn) parents and they control me like a baby. Can i ever get a Girlfriend in this condition or do i have to move out first? Sounds like you should have left 5 years ago.
Mme. Chaucer Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 From what i read in dating websites and just what i hear in real life. Most guys that live with their parents ..the girls think it's stupid. and immature. Although in other countries is totally ok, in America it seems to be looked down upon. I live with my (damn) parents and they control me like a baby. Can i ever get a Girlfriend in this condition or do i have to move out first? No, girls don't like 30 year old men who allow themselves to be "controlled like a baby." You know that, though.
lizwashere Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 In all honesty, grown women who are employed and have their own place are not looking for adult men who still live with their parents. My first reaction to meeting someone like you would be he's looking for a substitute mommy who's going to cook, clean the house, do laundry etc. I've been on my own since graduating from college - at one point as a graduate student I worked three different jobs, including teaching, to pay my rent and support myself. You, on the other hand, have not gone through this maturation process and more importantly you have no idea what it's like to take care of yourself independently of your parents.
Sabali Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 You just have to have your area of the house pimped out well. Like today, I will hang nice curtains and place candles at strategic positions.
Mme. Chaucer Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 You just have to have your area of the house pimped out well. Like today, I will hang nice curtains and place candles at strategic positions. Yeah, if your mommy will allow you to decorate the way you want to. And let you have matches to light those candles.
Mme. Chaucer Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 The right woman will. Really? The living at home is not the big deal breaker, IMO. Being "controlled like a baby" by one's parents would be. I don't know any women who would go for that, but probably you're right ... there are probably some out there. Probably not very healthy ones, though.
Sabali Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 Yeah, if your mommy will allow you to decorate the way you want to. And let you have matches to light those candles. Hey, sometimes I sneak matches from mom to light those candles. Once they are all lit, I use them as part of a meditation ritual to visit the astral plane. What's your address, mommy?
lizwashere Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 Really? The living at home is not the big deal breaker, IMO. Being "controlled like a baby" by one's parents would be. I don't know any women who would go for that, but probably you're right ... there are probably some out there. Probably not very healthy ones, though. A woman who is so desperate to be in a relationship that she will overlook this huge red flag, but anyone who's read the OP's other posts knows he's not looking for that type of woman, he wants hot, sexy women who have no reason whatsoever to settle for a man in his situation.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 Really? The living at home is not the big deal breaker, IMO. Being "controlled like a baby" by one's parents would be. I don't know any women who would go for that, but probably you're right ... there are probably some out there. Probably not very healthy ones, though. I was responding to the thread topic, not the OP. Sorry for any confusion. And yes, I agree that "being controlled like a baby" is a turnoff. It would be one thing if he was going to college, working, and contributing to the household, but it doesn't sound like he's doing that here. Another thing is, if he was taking care of a sick relative (like I am.) It's understandable then why you would live at home. And honestly, in this economy, more and more young adults (under 40) are moving back home. It's not weird or different. Bush, and now Obama, have made it impossible for you to enjoy living on your own; you need your parents to fall back on, because there aren't jobs. And I hear so many times about girls that date drug addicts, who live at home, who don't have jobs and hit them. Of course, they roll over and play love for these men, so I don't see how the OP is at a disadvantage for living at home and working at the same time. And he has admitted in a different thread that he's borderline retarded, so that would explain why he can't be a doctor. OP, to answer your question, no it's not a turnoff to live at home at 30. Especially in this economy. But it IS a turnoff to play like a 9 year old who begs his mommy for treats. Do your own laundry, do your own dishes, bring in an income, and no woman will treat you like you're a child when you're living under your parents roof.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 A woman who is so desperate to be in a relationship that she will overlook this huge red flag, but anyone who's read the OP's other posts knows he's not looking for that type of woman, he wants hot, sexy women who have no reason whatsoever to settle for a man in his situation. Oh yes. And you know this...how? I suppose "hot and sexy women" are alien creatures from the planet narcissism, and they don't have human brains and feelings and would never settle for a good man when there are hot and sexy "bad boys" out there who want them, right? I get dumped on for saying the same thing you just did, but the funny thing is, I change my perspective, and then you repeat the same thing I did. And the even funnier thing is, as a woman, you don't get punished for it...while I get branded a misogynist. Funny world, huh?
Mme. Chaucer Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 Hey, sometimes I sneak matches from mom to light those candles. Once they are all lit, I use them as part of a meditation ritual to visit the astral plane. What's your address, mommy? You'll need to google me on the Astral Internet for that.
lizwashere Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 I was responding to the thread topic, not the OP. Sorry for any confusion. And yes, I agree that "being controlled like a baby" is a turnoff. It would be one thing if he was going to college, working, and contributing to the household, but it doesn't sound like he's doing that here. Another thing is, if he was taking care of a sick relative (like I am.) It's understandable then why you would live at home. And honestly, in this economy, more and more young adults (under 40) are moving back home. It's not weird or different. Bush, and now Obama, have made it impossible for you to enjoy living on your own; you need your parents to fall back on, because there aren't jobs. And I hear so many times about girls that date drug addicts, who live at home, who don't have jobs and hit them. Of course, they roll over and play love for these men, so I don't see how the OP is at a disadvantage for living at home and working at the same time. And he has admitted in a different thread that he's borderline retarded, so that would explain why he can't be a doctor. OP, to answer your question, no it's not a turnoff to live at home at 30. Especially in this economy. But it IS a turnoff to play like a 9 year old who begs his mommy for treats. Do your own laundry, do your own dishes, bring in an income, and no woman will treat you like you're a child when you're living under your parents roof. Your comment about women wanting drug addicts living at home holds absolutely no weight because we are talking about a tiny percentage - that would be like me claiming that since so many men are in jail for rape, pedophilia, and sexual assault that all men are violent creeps who hate women and children. BTW, you have my total respect for taking care of a sick relative that is not an easy thing to do and it absolutely limits your social life. Although my comments to the OP may seem harsh, considering his limitations he continues to start threads voicing utterly unrealistic expectations for a partner and there are some posters who feed his fantasies by encouraging him and his obsessions with a particular type of woman.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 As this thread has demonstrated and will continue to demonstrate women are harsher judges. It will be harder to find someone. Yet if a man used the same criteria as a woman he would find many fewer candidates. Double standards ahoy on all sides and in all ports. My point for saying that is that the OP doesn't need to settle for women he's not attracted to. I don't see anything even slightly romantic about that. "When we first met, baby, I thought you were a mountain troll. You looked like you ate a small polar bear, and washed it down with 3 2 liters of coke and a bunch of alcohol! Damn, you're so fugly, that you're sexy...because I couldn't find anything else! Ha! Hey, why are you walking away from me? Baby?" Yes, that would be very romantic... I admittedly haven't read all of the OP's threads, but I doubt he's going after unattainable women. Most likely, he's saying he wants someone he's attracted to, and the sensitive women on here are saying that he's only going after Angelina Jolie. That seems to be a feminine trait that every woman shares, thanks to Oprah and Tyra Banks.
lizwashere Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 Oh yes. And you know this...how? I suppose "hot and sexy women" are alien creatures from the planet narcissism, and they don't have human brains and feelings and would never settle for a good man when there are hot and sexy "bad boys" out there who want them, right? I get dumped on for saying the same thing you just did, but the funny thing is, I change my perspective, and then you repeat the same thing I did. And the even funnier thing is, as a woman, you don't get punished for it...while I get branded a misogynist. Funny world, huh? Yes, because hot, sexy men are just dying to date mildly retarded women in their 30's who live at home and are treated like babies by their parents.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 Yes, because hot, sexy men are just dying to date mildly retarded women in their 30's who live at home and are treated like babies by their parents. I sense a hint of resentment and self entitlement. You should get that checked out ASAP.
Nexus One Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 (edited) I suppose "hot and sexy women" are alien creatures from the planet narcissism, and they don't have human brains and feelings and would never settle for a good man when there are hot and sexy "bad boys" out there who want them, right? You're probably being sarcastic there, but in my opinion, there's some truth in what you said there. Many if not most women think ahead in practical terms when it comes to having a private living space. Many women between 20 and 30 love to have loud wild sex, many love to argue too. And they'd rather not do those things when the guy's parents are around. It's cold hard reality. Many do in fact go for the bad boys. For every 200 good men that aren't getting any, 1 player will fill that gap. Edited May 8, 2011 by Nexus One
lizwashere Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 I sense a hint of resentment and self entitlement. You should get that checked out ASAP. You are greatly mistaken, I"m simply reacting to the ridiculous comments made by you and other men on this forum about how shallow women are. Considering the OP's situation any woman entering a relationship with him would have to take on the role of caretaker - that is not an easy thing to do no matter how kind and good-hearted. It's one thing to do that for a relative it's an entirely different issue to have to take on that role in a romantic relationship.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 You're probably being sarcastic there, but in my experience, there's some truth in what you said there. Many if not most women think ahead in practical terms when it comes to having a private living space. Many women between 20 and 30 love to have loud wild sex, many love to argue too. And they'd rather not do those things when the guy's parents are around. It's cold hard reality. Many do in fact go for the bad boys. For every 200 good men that aren't getting any, 1 player will fill that gap. Yeah, I was being sarcastic. Thanks for catching it. My point was that, if a MAN says it, he's a misogynist. If a WOMAN says it, she's just protecting the sisterhood. And the OP doesn't need to become a bad boy in order to get a woman. He just needs 1 woman, who is a little bit different, who will fall in love with him for who he is. And when there is attraction on both sides. I think that's another thing that liz didn't get. She seems to think that he has to settle for someone he's not attracted to, simply because he lives at home and has some mental problems. I'd hate to see her try to raise an autistic or down syndrome child.
Author quietGuy13 Posted May 8, 2011 Author Posted May 8, 2011 "OP, to answer your question, no it's not a turnoff to live at home at 30. Especially in this economy. But it IS a turnoff to play like a 9 year old who begs his mommy for treats. Do your own laundry, do your own dishes, bring in an income, and no woman will treat you like you're a child when you're living under your parents roof." I don't beg my mommy for treats. I work and have a job and help out and pay my rent(although it's not as much as 900 ) and i do my laundry and dishses. But my parents do snoop in my room even if i tell them not too. They don't let me go out at night even if it's just 7pm. And then they have all these plans about where i'm gonna live and taking care of their properties even though i tell them i won't do it. And if i tell them i'm moving out, they just laugh and ridicule me and get mad. I'm quiet and slow so i don't act like a mature 30 year old business man though. It's not in me. i struggle with language and speaking. I have talked with various girls but they do accept me(one even wants to be my GF even though she knows i live with my parents and i'm kind of childish). But they are from other countries. But from the looks of it and from what you guys have commented so far, it really doesn't seem like American girls would accept me. Bummer well, so you say MOVE OUT.. But my parents get angry and it would start a huge family feud if i did. My parents are not accepting at all.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 Listen, you deserve happiness. It sounds like you have everything, or most of everything, worked out. You just have controlling parents, but everything else you're doing right. I wouldn't even say that it's mental retardation that you're suffering from. More like a clingy kind of reliance. And your parents don't sound like nice people, if they don't care about the wishes of their son. Go with the girl that likes you, and that you like. Go on a few dates, and see if you like each other. If she is on the internet, though, that might prove problematic (and if you haven't met her, how do you know for sure that she is who she says she is?) American women aren't the issue, dude. I said 50% of American women respond to the bad boys. That's higher than figures in other countries, but it's not impossible to meet a nice American girl, if you're a nice American guy. You just have to be more picky and selective (no matter what liz, or any other poster on here, says.) Do you work out and keep in shape? Are you stylish? Maybe working on your image would help improve your chances with women? It couldn't hurt. Oh, and before lizwashere slaps this "virgin boy" for pulling figures out of thin air, no, I don't have a reference. It's just something that I've noticed, and that I feel.
Ruby Slippers Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 well, so you say MOVE OUT.. But my parents get angry and it would start a huge family feud if i did. My parents are not accepting at all. This is your life. Your parents will get over it. And they'll thank you once the grandkids come.
Pyro Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 The economy has been cruel to many and I can understand if a man has to move back into his parents for reasons like that. At that point the man should hold off on dating and make finding a job and saving money for a new place top priority. There's not much privacy if you want to bring a date home. Now if the man moves back home to take care of a sick parent/relative I would hope women would be ok with that.
krz12 Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 As this thread has demonstrated and will continue to demonstrate women are harsher judges. It will be harder to find someone. Yet if a man used the same criteria as a woman he would find many fewer candidates. Double standards ahoy on all sides and in all ports. There's a biological imperative here that has been true for thousands of years. Men are supposed to be providers, and if you can't provide for yourself you certainly can't provide for a family.
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