Relationship gone or not..

[Trajedi]

I hope i'm posting in the correct forum..

 

My best friend for 17 years now have had on and off again connections.. Sometimes it was me or her that got in contact with the other person..

About 3 years ago after a 3 year break we got into contact again.. She's had feelings for me since s he was 15 but I broke her heart.. Let me explain.. We knew each other about 6 months and her father was in the Navy and she moved 3 states away. We wrote letters and phone calls, and her Sr year in HS i was invited to go to Prom with her. I bought a plane ticket and had a wonderful time with her.. Her father even gave me his navy cuff links to wear on my tux.. But she had a friend that was moving near me in the next year and I got in contact with her. It broke my Best F heart and she cried for weeks.. So her mother doesn't like me to much..

 

She eventually got married and divorced.. I happen to get in contact with her after the divorce and she started to flirt with me again, i always thought it was just friendly.. So I flew up there to visit her (she said i wasn't the same person she knew and wasn't that great of a weekend) Then I got into a lil trouble and had to go on vacation for a few years and she was mad at me and said she would never contact me again if i did.. But after I got out I called her parents phone number and got hers (she told me the next day the # would of been disconnected).. We talked about the good times and bad about our lives and could tell she was happy to hear my voice again.. So she decided to come visit me for a weekend..

 

So we had a lil bit to much to drink and had love making i guess.. She was so happy and when she flew back home decided to look for a job down here since she wanted to improve her career.. A few months later she flew down got an interview and finally got a job at a new place opening up.. We started to date about 2 years ago.. Of course it was nice and happy at first.. But I couldn't find a job cause of my history.. I had one before but layed off..

 

She was the greatest in helping me and pushing me to better myself.. Bought me hygiene products and the such. Put me on her cell plan.. But I couldn't get a job and she lived 30 mins away.. We had our ups and some great downs.. We talked about my downs and they scared her cause I didn't respect myself.. Made a promise not to do those things again and they weren't very good either, regrets come to mind..

 

Now to about a month ago the text started to get less and less.. She would text me saying 'I'm sorry for being distant' and the such.. We were planning on seeing each other or on skype to chat.. It never happened.. (she even got me a webcam last year) I just didn't put enough effort into seeing her always my friends first..

 

I got a job and she said she was congratulations! Very Happy for me.. a later text from her said 'it took me getting hurt for you to get motivated' and I hope your motivation last.. I asked if we could go get a bite to eat or something and told me 'seeing you is really hard for me. Very happy that you are working'

 

Well for lent she gave up FB and when easter came around I was defriended and she put in a relationship (her parents were on FB and was working on getting better with them before we talked to them about it).. It broke my heart and a mutual friend said she'll text you if you want.. She was saying I was not trying to hurt you honestly.. You are my best friend.. Really was trying to not hurt u.. Honestly! She was scared of my reaction of her dating someone else.. But mentioned 'You would never hurt me physically' Is there anyway that we can be friends?.. Email or text anytime.. Know that I will always be there for you.. Alway!

 

Now that was about 2 weeks ago, we do happy cinco de mayo and such to keep it brief.. I even wrote her a letter last week like we did in HS.. It was just talking about my life and how I am doing (since we haven't talked on the phone or communicated in awhile).. Never said i miss your or love you.. She txt'd me she got it and told me she would write back.. That was monday and no letter..

 

She told me to tell my mom and gram happy mothers day the other day.. Now what I like to ask is am I wrong for the LC.? Cause a friend of mine said stay with her and let her know you are changing for the best.. Don't tell her but show her and if she ask let her know.. But don't stop txt'n her..

 

I think she got frustrated with me and might have an influence from her mother.. She was trying to get me on her mothers good side..

 

Confused on how to react to this situation.. Yes she has a rebound right now but I miss my Best Friend and she said I miss my BFF..

 

If this is post is long, I was just trying to explain my situation..

Edited May 8, 2011 by Trajedi

[Trajedi]

Am I asking to much or not asking it correctly.?

 

Also to give a friendly bump..