guitarguy09 Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 I know its a pretty dumb question to ask but i figured you guys would share some wisdom that'll help me feel better. I was with my ex for 2 years and almost 5 months ago, around December, I was left for a guy she just met. It wasn't until late February where she had turned her RL public and asked to meet up with me about 2 weeks later to apologize for lying to me and talking about her new bf(saying shes safe and I wont have to worry ;all that bs) and asking to still be friends with me Since then I remained in strict no contact and in time, I felt a little better about myself and not everything revolved around the situation, until last Sunday she sent me a text from her asking "How I was doing". TBH it set me back a bit no matter how hard I tried to shrug it off, her reappearing in my life got me feeling quite disturbed these past few days. Anyway, I replied and said " Im doing good. You?" then she sends this message about her watching an old video of our dog and she just wanted to see how I was. Then two days later I get an email saying she wants "to chat"( probably a friend request from gmail IDK) I really just want to forget about it and continue moving on. thanks!
JasonRules Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 I know its a pretty dumb question to ask but i figured you guys would share some wisdom that'll help me feel better. I was with my ex for 2 years and almost 5 months ago, around December, I was left for a guy she just met. It wasn't until late February where she had turned her RL public and asked to meet up with me about 2 weeks later to apologize for lying to me and talking about her new bf(saying shes safe and I wont have to worry ;all that bs) and asking to still be friends with me Since then I remained in strict no contact and in time, I felt a little better about myself and not everything revolved around the situation, until last Sunday she sent me a text from her asking "How I was doing". TBH it set me back a bit no matter how hard I tried to shrug it off, her reappearing in my life got me feeling quite disturbed these past few days. Anyway, I replied and said " Im doing good. You?" then she sends this message about her watching an old video of our dog and she just wanted to see how I was. Then two days later I get an email saying she wants "to chat"( probably a friend request from gmail IDK) I really just want to forget about it and continue moving on. thanks! Just ask her what she wants. Also, tell her you're not interested in being friends. End of story. She's just feeling guilty and wants to relieve herself of the guilt by trying to be nice to you now. Never accept being second best to anyone.
Eddie Edirol Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 i would say ignore her. But if you want to make sure she isnt relieved of any guilt, you could make sure that when she tells you what she wants, you remind her of what a horrible person she is for lying to you, leading you on and then tell her never to contact you again...but do it with nice words so she cant look for your anger as a reason to NOT feel guilty.
vsmini Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 If my ex boyfriend texted me I would just text back "I'm good, thanks" and if he emailed me I would say "I hope you are doing well but I'm not interested in maintaining contact with you." Boom - that should get rid of her. If not - girl has issues and wants a fall back guy.
Author guitarguy09 Posted May 7, 2011 Author Posted May 7, 2011 i would say ignore her. But if you want to make sure she isnt relieved of any guilt, you could make sure that when she tells you what she wants, you remind her of what a horrible person she is for lying to you, leading you on and then tell her never to contact you again...but do it with nice words so she cant look for your anger as a reason to NOT feel guilty. funny you said that, when we meet up 2 months ago and she asked to be friends I told her I didnt want to nor did i want to have any contact with her
Stilicho Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 dude, ur story is almost identical to mine. with my ex for 2 yrs, had huge plans, etc, she up and leaves wth some loser form her job. she sees me around campus, tries to worm her way back in. texts, calls, etc. run man, now. dont even respond, let her cringe a little, wondering why u dont answer. remember how she hurt you? of course u do, and that should show you that shes not worth even responding too. good luck man
Author guitarguy09 Posted May 10, 2011 Author Posted May 10, 2011 got another text today. same question ; "how are you doing?" and this time when i asked, it was about my band, and how she hasnt seen any recent posts on our facebook. I mean, last time it was about our dog, and now its this. Does she have a hidden agenda or is she being honest?
LoveHurts89 Posted May 10, 2011 Posted May 10, 2011 I'm guessing she's missing you. To the extent that she's making a conscious effort to look on Facebook for posts from your band. Is it possible she's seeking reconciliation?
Chi townD Posted May 10, 2011 Posted May 10, 2011 ^^^^ Why would he want to?^^^^^ This girl has rung this guy through the ringer. She's still feeling guilty. Having a hard time thinking that there's a person out in the world that doesn't think she is the best thing since apple pie. Breadcrumbs dude, don't even respond.
Author guitarguy09 Posted May 11, 2011 Author Posted May 11, 2011 true enough. but do you guys think shes really interested in how my band and dog are doing or do you think shes just using it to try and lure me in again since I've been MIA for quite some time
Desensitized Posted May 11, 2011 Posted May 11, 2011 true enough. but do you guys think shes really interested in how my band and dog are doing or do you think shes just using it to try and lure me in again since I've been MIA for quite some time she's only "interested" because she knows that that's what you like. She's trying to make it seem like she's interested in you so you keep contact with her. Don't even bother talking to her, like someone said, she's feeding you breadcrumbs.
betterdeal Posted May 11, 2011 Posted May 11, 2011 Reply to texts, emails &c. with a phone call if anything at all. If she can't say it out loud then she's just having brain farts and you're downwind.
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