D-Lish Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 (edited) Something went off like a lightning bolt for me when I met my now ex- I don't actually like being alone. I've pretty much been alone for the last 10 years, and I became accustomed to it. Somewhere along the line I convinced myself that I enjoyed it, at the very least I was cool with it. Then all of a sudden I met someone, and we were spending every day with one another. I resisted at first, but he pushed- and I absolutely loved having someone by my side every day. Since he left, I've felt such a huge void in my life. It's not just that I loved him and miss HIM- getting involved with someone after being alone for so long awakened that yearning for companionship that I fooled myself into believing I didn't need for such a long time. I told my mom after a few months of dating that I felt he was "the one". Those words scared me, coming from my lips- as I've always been far too cautious to acknowledge something as risky as that. Well, he proved not to be "the one", as he walked away as quick as he came. When I met him, something in me woke up, and despite the crushing blow the break up has had on me- I don't want to go back to living in a cave for another 10 years and hide from the fact that I want to meet someone. The real problem for me is HOW? All my friends are married with families, I work in an all female organization. Online dating has just become weird. I don't want to jump into something right now as I am still reeling from my recent break up- but I don't want to go back to where I was before I met him either. Edited May 7, 2011 by D-Lish
skydiveaddict Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 I don't want to go back to living in a cave for another 10 years and hide from the fact that I want to meet someone. The real problem for me is HOW? All my friends are married with families, I work in an all female organization. Online dating has just become weird. I know how you feel D. Anyway you slice it, being alone sucks. I'm tired of it too.
Author D-Lish Posted May 7, 2011 Author Posted May 7, 2011 All I know is that I really like your post, attitude and you're pretty. I mean, you make fart talk....that is awesome and you're to good for any random *********.... Alone is tough, I know that and it sucks to see your friends so happy all in relationships, married or watching the cute couple kanoodling along the sidewalk and you and I the loners walk back to out dens and sulk about it. I like you, D-Lish....you're so freakin funny.... You seem so fun to be around and nice....I'm not going to say "you'll get there or "it will be ok" but I wil say... Don't sell yourself short...you're alone ATM, but you have lots to do, get done and see in life...Hold out and possibly someone will walk into your life....someone that is actually worthy of YOU. I hate seeing people distressed like this...I know how it feels and wish I could do more help more, but on a forum....this is all I can do. So....Are you into F'cked up dudes that look like Doogie Houser MD? Or Shaggy from Scooby Doo? Just askin....lol... I can cook..... Lol, you made me smile. I'm going to agree with you- I am funny:lmao: I have that funny side, my humour has no boundaries. Farting is funny- bottom line:laugh:. I have a bitchy side though. It's a defense mechanism, and it's not okay. I need to work on that. And Scooby Doo is the name of my dog:cool: Yes, I have a Westie named Scooby Doo, lol. What can you cook? It can't be seafood, I'm allergic! F'ck....I feel so bad for you..... Despite my LS image, I can be nice sometimes..... Like Johan...and now you...B4R...I know just as well what loneliness can do.... You're probaly sittin there clicking back and forth seeing who repies, got the telly on, drinking a Coke....not wanting to sleep ect ect... I'm stil at the laundromat I work in and it's almost 1 A.M. I just don''t want to go home and do nothing..... It's so quiet there...I like i tbetter here cause people come in and I talk to em sometimes...I feel not alone at those times. I hate *******s that walk out on girls....specially good ones like you. I haven't seen your bad LS image C- you've always been nice in the threads I've read. Everything you wrote really made me smile, and thank you for that- because I was having a bad night, and you said a few nice things- and I feel a little better. Are you done your laundry yet?
Star Gazer Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Lol, you made me smile. I'm going to agree with you- I am funny:lmao: I have that funny side, my humour has no boundaries. Farting is funny- bottom line:laugh:. I have a bitchy side though. It's a defense mechanism, and it's not okay. I need to work on that. And Scooby Doo is the name of my dog:cool: Yes, I have a Westie named Scooby Doo, lol. What can you cook? It can't be seafood, I'm allergic! We have so much in common!
Author D-Lish Posted May 7, 2011 Author Posted May 7, 2011 We have so much in common! 1) Farting is funny 2) Scooby Doo is the best cartoon ever made 3) Bitchy at times, yet there is so much more to us 4) Shellfish sucks. Doesn't seem like a hard sell to me:lmao:.
Author D-Lish Posted May 7, 2011 Author Posted May 7, 2011 I gotta dump this username.... I'm not who you think, D... I'm Eric..not Miss Erased. Anyways..I can cook a mean Taco an dmake it so it cuts down the chances it wil cause bad farting. I like to make armpit farts and I am doing a youtube video soon of armpit farts.....I believe in doing dumb **** when really distressed...funny can get you out of dark places... Doesn't matter who your alter ego is my friend. You made me feel really good with your comments tonight, and I really appreciate it. Thank you:love:
Star Gazer Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 1) Farting is funny 2) Scooby Doo is the best cartoon ever made 3) Bitchy at times, yet there is so much more to us 4) Shellfish sucks. Doesn't seem like a hard sell to me:lmao:. Don't forget we're both smart, stylish, and stunning! Haha... well, maybe YOU are.
Author D-Lish Posted May 7, 2011 Author Posted May 7, 2011 Don't forget we're both smart, stylish, and stunning! Haha... well, maybe YOU are. I've seen your pics girlfriend;) Stunning and stylish is a given. The fact that I don't think I've ever seen you make a grammatical error in a post in the 6 years I've been on LS tells me that: a) you're not a big drinker, and b) you're smarter than the average bear:p
orangelady Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Huh? I thought you have a boyfriend. Must have been confused.
Dust Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Huh? I thought you have a boyfriend. Must have been confused. Rub it in why don't you.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Rub one OUT why don't you Don't feed the troll. As far as being alone, I am familiar with that. All too familiar. I'd just like to experience ONE relationship, just to at least say that I've been in love. Unfortunately, girls don't feel the same way.
orangelady Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Unfortunately, girls don't feel the same way. Oh you must be one of those guys who rant about how girls don't want to be in relationship with them and those girls must be hot and you can't get them. Right? If I present you a nice, loyal and giving girl who wants to be in relationship but she isn't average or hot looking, you'd say 'no thanks' but you come on here and complain that the entire gender does not want to be in relationship.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Oh you must be one of those guys who rant about how girls don't want to be in relationship with them and those girls must be hot and you can't get them. Right? If I present you a nice, loyal and giving girl who wants to be in relationship but she isn't average or hot looking, you'd say 'no thanks' but you come on here and complain that the entire gender does not want to be in relationship. No, even unattractive women don't want me.
orangelady Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 No, even unattractive women don't want me. Sorry, I find that quite hard to believe. If I find you a lady that is nice and wants a relationship with you but isn't all quite pretty, you'd think otherwise.
jerbear Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 1) Farting is funny 2) Scooby Doo is the best cartoon ever made 3) Bitchy at times, yet there is so much more to us 4) Shellfish sucks. Doesn't seem like a hard sell to me:lmao:. Remember guys like bithcy women, dogs (scooby doo), guys fart, and we don't care as long we have a cave. Not that hard of a sale. I would have bought you. I've seen your pics girlfriend;) Stunning and stylish is a given. The fact that I don't think I've ever seen you make a grammatical error in a post in the 6 years I've been on LS tells me that: a) you're not a big drinker, and b) you're smarter than the average bear:pagreed.
guy777 Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Sorry to hear about you going through a tough time D-Lish. I completely identify with what your saying about being alone for lengthy periods, then having someone awaken something in you that you've tried to ignore, but then it doesn't workout the way we hoped and having no other choice but to move on. I wish I would have followed the advice many give about moving on faster than I did. I had a good time when I finally did. But then that didn't work out either and now I'm back trying to move on again. Where did we sign up for this?? We just have to have as much fun as possible with things we are passionate about and make the best of it, and not settle for anything less. Then hopefully someone will come along that we can share that passion with someday.
Author D-Lish Posted May 8, 2011 Author Posted May 8, 2011 Sorry to hear about you going through a tough time D-Lish. I completely identify with what your saying about being alone for lengthy periods, then having someone awaken something in you that you've tried to ignore, but then it doesn't workout the way we hoped and having no other choice but to move on. I wish I would have followed the advice many give about moving on faster than I did. I had a good time when I finally did. But then that didn't work out either and now I'm back trying to move on again. Where did we sign up for this?? We just have to have as much fun as possible with things we are passionate about and make the best of it, and not settle for anything less. Then hopefully someone will come along that we can share that passion with someday. I agree with you. In the last 10 years I've spent 80% of the time being single. I grew accustomed to it by the time I met my ex. Having a companion was actually pretty awesome. For me, meeting people is hard. If I'm not doing online dating, it's not going to happen. I don't get out much, all I do is work. I'd really like to get out more. I'm just so particular about who I want to go on a date with. Maybe 1 or 2 people come along every couple of years that interest me- and I'm not getting any younger. I need to find something other than work to get enjoyment out of.
Author D-Lish Posted May 8, 2011 Author Posted May 8, 2011 Try not to dwell on getting older and still no relationship, that will drive you mad and more opt to just "take what you can get" Just don't think about that. You mention finding something to get out and do besides work....yes...you need to find something that brings satisfaction... It DOES help. Lastly.... Friends.... it is nice to be surrounded by friends and people....don't keep yourself isolated. Even without a "MAN" you can still feel content that you are not alone in life. I really feel you....being lonesome is very hard. P.S. I probably went overboard on my humour last night....Apologies:cool: No need to apologize, you said nice thing that helped me feel better. It's difficult being 41 and single- because my friends are at home dedicated to their families. How do you get out there and develop a new social life at 41? I have a support system in my parents- and I can certainly pick up the phone and talk to my friends on their cordless phone while they have one baby on the breast as they are chasing around a toddler or two... But I feel guilty for asking for support from them when they are so occupied.
westernxer Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 It's difficult being 41 and single... Q. What's worse than being 41 and single? A. I'll let you know when I turn 41. Sorry, bad joke. LOL
Author D-Lish Posted May 8, 2011 Author Posted May 8, 2011 Q. What's worse than being 41 and single? A. I'll let you know when I turn 41. Sorry, bad joke. LOL Well, it's true. It's not pretty, and it's lonley. So what if you're 41, it doesn't matter and you can always make a new social life or "enhance" the one you have by finding, talking with girls in the same, exact boat you're in. Find them by doing stuff, girl stuff...I'm not sure, but like Avon parties and the such:laugh: You'll have to be inventive on that. Many single ladies out there without men... You all could develop your very own "sex In The City" type relationship...you know...single woman getting together having a good time. I'm not the best advice giver and it does suck to not be in a relationship and I know how envious I get over others in them. I get downright sick over it and that feeling of loneliness just consumes you, always feeling you're walking the dark road to a home that is quiet, dark and lifeless, envying your friends in their homes all happy with all sorts of activity going on. Try not to dwell on your age and you don't need a man to feel complete, it's hard because EVERYONE wants a dream relationship, but it doesn't have to define your life forever if you don't get such relationships. Like I said before..I'm not that good at advice... I'm always afraid that I may not make sense, but I'm just trying my best to say.... You can be happy without a man, it's not all about a man, but possibly your dream man may find you sometime and it doesn't matter how old you are when it does happen. In the meantime just keep on being you and make some more friends....Not here, not on the computer, but friends out in the world you can actually visit and be with. No, you just gave me good advice, advice that made sense to me. Don't stress over how you come across, because you have been really helpful, and everything you've said has made sense to me. Age shouldn't matter- and we should never settle. I just don't want to move on to that next dating phase where i am looking for compatibility instead of physical attraction- I'm not ready for that yet:rolleyes: I still look really young for my age, so I should capitalize What age range are you in? Just curious.
Dust Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 What age range are you in? Just curious. The 35-40 age range. So, are you and eric going to have a love connection?
Author D-Lish Posted May 8, 2011 Author Posted May 8, 2011 The 35-40 age range. So, are you and eric going to have a love connection? I'm asking his age to get a perspective from where his advice is coming from. I'm really not in a position to connect with anyone given the state of my heart. I'd take a friendship- that's the extent of my capability.
TouchedByViolet Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 I can very much relate. I have been searching/hoping for a long term relationship for two solid years now and have nothing to show except some funny stories. Depending on the day and my state of self loneliness can be a heavy mental weight. A lack of intimacy is a strange visceral burden.
Author D-Lish Posted May 8, 2011 Author Posted May 8, 2011 It's embarrassing to say, but I am 36. You'd think I was 12 from my post and what I do, but I like to be odd sometimes and throw out an occasional blurb or something in the middle of a thread and catch people off guard. In real life I am MUCH. MUCH more my age. It's just fun to be stupid in forums sometimes and it cracks me up plus I don't like being serious for to very long and I can be damn serious when I want or feel I need to be....like in your thread. Your thread hit home and I wanted to make you not feel as bad last night even if it took stupid humour lol. I put mustard on my potato sticks:laugh: I put french fries in my sandwiches:love: And you made me feel really good last night- just through being supportive- and I really appreciated your support.
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