Does she still love me and is her rebound real or not ? Should i let her go ?

[tom1990]

Well I will try and attempt to keep this as short as i can even though that isnt going to happen (/hasnt since ive wrote it haha ) so i dont bore you all to death but here goes ...

 

Basically i was with my girlfriend for over 2 and a half years... We had broke up in the past before for nothing serious so always got back together... But recently i have had a lot of stress i am in my final year of university and have exams / coursework to be doing... Ive kinda treated her generally pretty **** ... I am known for being one of those people who never stops smiling and is happy and fun to be around but recently ive been a bore and miserable and moody... and Ive taken things out on her and driven her away .... We were arguing over petty things and it was usually me that initiated it... I noticed how much of a prick i was being to her but i didnt apologize and she never mentioned anything until we had one last arugement and she threw it all in my face ...

 

We have a number of other issues such as my family (dad in paticular) has reasons for not liking her due to something her mother did and he thinks that my ex was also in on it as well ... And the ex feels like my dad would never forgive her so this adds to the reasons why she wanted to split up from me ...

 

Anyway we had NC for a week up until today and i couldnt bare to not talk to her any longer... She is stubborn so i didnt want to text her or phone her i wanted face to face conversation and im glad i went ... We talked and she said she still has feelings for me and what not BUT this is where my heart dropped and i felt physically sick...

 

I am only just 21 and in my final year at uni she is only 20 and is 21 a fair while off ... But she told me how she went out with her friends from work on the saturday after we broke up and ended up stopping at a guys flat ... the guy is 27 and she SWEARS nothing sexual or even physical at all happened it was purely due to the fact she would of had to get a taxi back on her own that would of cost her £20... But then she told me how she stopped with him on wednsday night ... The thing is this guy is 27... and in all honesty i am struggling to see the attraction minus the fact he RENTS his own flat ... Now im not being funny but i would hope to be renting my own place or even have a mortgage at 27 i know we live in a harsh financial climate but still... The guy works in a predomnantly womens clothes shop as a general assistant ... But anyway he is SHORT , SKINNY and into EVERYTHING she is not ... they have NOTHING in common , share none of the same tastes, his personality from what i know of him is very bland and boring and his sense of humour is completly different ... and when i asked her if she enjoyed going to cinema and what not with him or me she said me .... I am not big headed but i am told i am a good looking guy, im 6ft 2 and ive been hitting the gym hard the past few months so am looking in pretty good shape Im outgoing fun and we had so much fun together as a couple we could turn anything into a fun good time and the love and cuddles we shared only complimented the fun times we had together...

 

Im bascally just REALLY confused ... as she said she still has feelings for me but thinks we cant be together right now and said its best we should take it slow as friends the next minute shes saying she thinks we shouldnt see eachother at alll then the next shes saying she doesnt know what we should do ... Now obviously im assuming she is confused ... And im PRAYING this guy is just a rebound and she will realise its not going to work soon enough ... The thing that worries me is the fact that for so long we have talked about moving in together we were meant to be doing so when i get a full time job ... and she would pay half the rent ... And our relatinship did hit a rough patch a few times BECAUSE of the fact that we dont live together and I dont have my own flat / place so we can just escape to it ... but this guy does ...

 

I just dont know what to do i love her SO much its killing me , I have been told off my friends and girlfriends i should just go out and forget about her and i can do better and that its her loss if she wants to get with this guy ... But i cant help my feelings and we also have TWO holidays booked for summer together ... So i am finding it hard to take in the fact we have split up / and cant really take it as if its for good ...

 

One thing that i keep pondering about is the fact that a year and ahalf ago we split up and I went on a rebound ... it lasted a couple of weeks we slept together and went on a couple of dates etc .... and my ex brought this up when we had a chat today ... Could she be doing this rebound out of spite ? or to give herself an ego boost ? I find it REALLY hard to believe their is much attraction their at all if ANY when i talked to her about it she was LAUGHING AT the guy when i mentioned certain things but i cant help but feel as though she is convincing herself that she likes him ...

 

Anyway i just want you guys opinion ...

Is it really over or does she still want to be with me ?

Is her little rebound out of spite and to get back at me / prove a point ?

She said shes not slept and doesnt plan on sleeping with him ... Is this a lie ? shes not the type of girl to sleep with people like that...

Is she more attracted to the fact this guy has a FLAT as oppose to the GUY himself ?

Is she just experimenting with this guy while she still has feelings for me to see which she prefers and whether she does want to be with me or not ?

 

I Just cant imagine my life without her but i dont want to pressurize her into anything and i dont want to force her to talk to me or see me but it just hurts I know im only 21 so some of you may say your young go enjoy yourself forget about her or whatever but I feel as though we are soulmates I have NEVER Met anyone who is such a perfect match for me in terms of every aspect and i find it hard to believe i ever will again if we dont get back together ...

[tom1990]

Realised no-body is replying probably cause there is to much information but i hope someone has the time to read it ...

[Stilicho]

hey dude, im the same age as you, and i recently went through something very similar with my ex. i know you dont want to hear this, but its over, forget about her. shes having sex with the guy, and is seeing him, all while stringing you along. go nc, let the coping process begin and look forward to your future.