heartbrokn Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 My long distance ex bf of 1 year broke up with me because of a silly reason. He says i was cheating because i changed my facebook password although he didnt call me for a week. When i gave him a valid reason of why i changed it ( too busy to log on, got friend to log on for me, she s untrustworthy so i changed it) he got mad and said i was lying. Later on that day in school he called me and my phone called back without me knowing. i happen to be having a convo with a dude classmate of mines , nothing serious jus a hey-hey convo and i went on talkn to other ppl. He askd me about it , i told him it was nothing serious jus hey-hey and that's it. We got into it over the phone , he hung up on me , followed by a text " we are done " ( on wed, 27 ) and a little extra added to it. My bf called me 3 days later (sat 30) asking how i was and jus a nice little convo, havent heard from him since. I miss him but jus lookin back i get mad at all the things he said to me and why he broke up with me in the 1st place!!! I wonder if he loves me or if he's moved on.... should i call him?
nana841121 Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 I think what he did was to overcompensate his infidelity he might have cheated on you long before breakup, and he yelled at you to cover his guilty JUST MY THEORY:cool:
Author heartbrokn Posted May 6, 2011 Author Posted May 6, 2011 thanks, i always felt like something serious was up but i never wanted to believe it, i still love him for some strange reason but i wouldnt get back with him, at least no time soon
tom1990 Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 Hmm this is a tough one ... The thing is your facebook password is YOURS ... regardless of what is on that account it is private and it is yours only , You are not married and do not need to share an account or anything, Do you know his password ? Why did he know your password in the first place ? It is a little insecure and untrustworthy of him to want to go on your facebook all the time... I know the feeling of being in his position i up until recently used to know the password of my girlfriend / now ex .. and I revelled in the fact i knew her password but never told her , i logged on and nothing really happened or cropped up but it felt good knowing that she was being faithful (according to facebook) and that she wasnt talking to many guys and what not ...But at the end of the day it turned into a BAD habbit checking up on her facebook 24-7 i would sometimes log into hers before i would my own. As Nana mentioned it could be because he has cheated previously ... It is a VERY good point, i cheated on my girlfriend once and she never found out (even to this day...) And when i had been mad at her a few times i would flirt with girls on facebook when i was drunk ... So the fact I kept checking hers and got mad when she changed her password was mainly down to the fact I HAD DONE WRONG in the past ... and was scared and insecure / untrusting about the fact she might do the same ...
Author heartbrokn Posted May 7, 2011 Author Posted May 7, 2011 i have no clue , he askd for it , i askd for his ( later on forgot it) and i had no problem with not checking his fb because i felt like i could trust him more than anythng, his previous ex nd him been in a relationship of 5 years , she cheated on him and that was it . i guess that made him insecure, but weve been through alot so i figured he could do the same! guess not, please tell me why after all the hurt i still love him....!? sometimes i jus feel like movn on bt it takes time when u have feelings for someone that deep, if he loved me /cared for me as much as i do he would call ..no matter how busy he is!!
Spicyhoney Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Wow! It sounds like the guy is controlling-he shouldnt need to get into your account-its called trust and like tom said it sounds as if hes tryn to cover his guilty feelings for cheatn. When he couldnt get into your acct he probably thought the worst, that you cheated too!. Why would he say other things-code for disrespect-im assuming, w/o a valid reason. It seems like he did you a big favor and let the cat out of the bag w/o even knowing it. Personally, I wouldnt stand for someone disrespecting me to make themselves feel better. If you stand for it once, expect it from now on. I think anyone is better than that. As far as still loving him, its normal even when someone does you wrong. But the good thing is youll think of all the mess he said and what hes more than likely have done and your feelings for this loser will fade until theres none!
DreamerGirl27 Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 It is not insecure to want to have your significant other's password to their facebook account. I see absolutely nothing wrong with that. I do think overreacted, though. He should've at least talked to you about it first and understood. Did you tell him you would give him your new one? Or did you just say you changed it and refused to give him your new one? If you refused to give him your new one, I'd dump you, too. There are no secrets between lovers and hiding your facebook account where you can talk to other guys on it is screaming...insecurity and the fact that you are untrustworthy. If you have nothing to hide, what's wrong with having each other's passwords? True couples who are in love don't even think twice about giving each other info like that. I would know. I have a couple of love birds on my facebook account. They are so cute.
DreamerGirl27 Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 oh, and especially if you're long distance. He can't even see you in person, so how else is he supposed to keep tabs on you? I know that sounds bad to put it that way, but basically, when you're in a relationship, you keep tabs on each other. It's the way it works. If you don't understand that, you're nowhere near ready to be in a relationship. With anyone.
Author heartbrokn Posted May 7, 2011 Author Posted May 7, 2011 i didnt have a problem with giving him my password , not at all. that was when he didnt contact me for a week and he suddenly called , i asked him why hasnt he called he said he was busy and im like sure ( sarcastically) ok and we started having a normal convo den he popped the question..(did u change ur fb password) and i told him yea i did , den we get in an argument ovahow im supposedly cheatn and im like wow ur actn so childish right now i have no problem with givin u mypassword but its kinda hard when u dont return my calls or text me and he s like well u shouldve text me u changed ur password..............OK why would i text you when you dont return my calls for a week or text me and let me know everythings ok
Eddie Edirol Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 he is way too controlling, and you dont want to be in a relationship with a guy like that anyways. he could have been hiding his infidelity, he could have started another relationship and was looking for a reason to break it off with you. In any case, dont have anymore long distance relationships, you have to be able to see them in person often for it to stay healthy. Some people can do it, but most cant. Go find someone closer to you.
Author heartbrokn Posted May 8, 2011 Author Posted May 8, 2011 Yea, you're so right! Guess i had to learn the hard way!!
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