Le' Christophe Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 (edited) Hi everyone! I'm very new to the whole dating game (been heavily focused on college and career-building until now - going to be getting my PhD in about a year, yayyy!), and I was just wondering if you might be able to give me some advice as a starry-eyed newcomer. So, how exactly DO people meet people to ask out on dates? For example, if you just happen to be walking around town and see somebody that you find attractive...you can't just walk up and ask them out right away of course, so is the conventional approach to strike up a conversation and then, after talking for a while, as if they'd like to grab lunch or a coffee? How do you go about striking up a random conversation without looking like a creeper? The problem I always run into is that, well, I'm a bit shy around girls...so when I see one that I'm attracted around the campus for example, if I try just saying a simple "Hi" they usually just say hi back and keep walking - but if I try to strike up a random conversation, well, it just seems like a blatant attempt to hit on them, something women probably get tired of and find disrespectful when they're trying to go about their business. Do you pretty much have to stick with people you're going to see often, i.e. in a class or activity, or is there a respecftul way to approach asking people out that you just meet randomly in public? (I know a lot of people also like to meet in bars, but...I don't drink :/) Another question I had is...well, I'm 26 now. Assuming the peak single age for women is in their early-twenties, does this mean I don't have much time left to date around? For example, when I hit thirty, will I be considered too old by the standards of most women in that age demographic? It would certainly be reassuring if I knew I had a lot of time to learn more about this... Thanks for your advice everyone!! And sorry, can't resist: I've been dying to use that emoticon the whole time I was typing this XD Edited May 6, 2011 by Le' Christophe
Nexus One Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 Another question I had is...well, I'm 26 now. Assuming the peak single age for women is in their early-twenties, does this mean I don't have much time left to date around? For example, when I hit thirty, will I be considered too old by the standards of most women in that age demographic? It would certainly be reassuring if I knew I had a lot of time to learn more about this... Regarding that, don't sweat it (too much). Most women date guys that are older than them. The rule I've seen applied most often is that they'd date someone up to 10 years older than they are themselves, sometimes even older. I think the reason for that is that women generally are into guys that are (mentally) more mature than guys of their own age or younger. Which is ideal for most men, because we tend to gravitate towards women who are younger than us. Regardless of that I think a -10/+10 age range is an acceptable range. But if I were you, I wouldn't wait too long, nobody's getting any younger by the day.
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