Sweet_T Posted May 5, 2011 Posted May 5, 2011 (edited) So...it's not like I don't know the deal, and I know what's best. Buuuttt...every single time I initiate NC, he breaks it! And right now I can't compose myself with him. We broke up a little over 2 months ago and ***** has been CHAOTIC! (to say the least). I have flipped in every imaginable way, which Im sure definitely was not to my benefit. But none the less it has happened. So...once again NC was initiated last wk and it only lasted 24 hrs! And BOOM! He calls again...unexpectedly (I should say, but that's how it always is with him). Anyways, I know that he has moved on, so why I did what I did most recently God only knows! On Sat after we had spent a couple of hours together and had been conversing all day he went MIA. I honestly went on ahead and went to sleep and decided at that point that I would not deal with him anymore, but then my friends called and right now we're all going trhu a break up so, it is NOT a pretty picture! They came and picked me up and I drove past his house. Of course his course his car wasn't there so I drove past his ex's house and there it was. I know that he's seeing her again so I should have been ok but after all the ear f@ucking I had been recieving gave me hope and when I saw his car outside her house it crushed me! And brought me right back to the drawing board. So...I called her and told her that he had in fact been contacting me and that we had been spending time together. I didn't talk to him after that, but then I asked him for my house key back and when he brought it to me, he had a close friend with him and he threw the key at me and kept walking! I played like I didnt see where it went because I wanted to talk to him, but that didn't happen. I hit him and we went at it for about 2mins before we both calmed down and said a few words to each other. The next day i finally got him on the phone and he told me that he was done because I don't know how to keep our business personal, but I wanted her to know that he was in fact still talking to me and I wanted his friend to know why I flipped on him. I know this is an awful situation and NC is BEST, but I miss him and I love him still. I don't know if it's simply the fact that he's rejecting me at the moment or what?!?!?!? Any input would be greatly appreciated. Thanks! T Edited May 5, 2011 by Sweet_T
Fufu Posted May 5, 2011 Posted May 5, 2011 NC is for yourself, not for him. So even if he contacts you, you remain NC no matter what. As long as you stick on to your NC and don't answer all his contacts, you are doing yourself a big favor. If you reply his contacts, you broke NC. And everytime you broke NC, you most likely have the urge and temptation to talk to him. So do your best to be strong and don't give in so easily. No one will ever know if he's just rejecting you at the moment or not, don't assume and don't over analyze, move on with your life.
Author Sweet_T Posted May 6, 2011 Author Posted May 6, 2011 Thanks Fufu...I appreciate it. I think its the feeling of rejection all together. I feel awful right now, because I find myself wanted to call him and hear his voice, talk to him, scream at him! All of it!!!!!! I just don't know what to do...
Chi townD Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 If he breaks NC, so what? The question is why do you keep responding? When you respond, it puts YOU back to square one! Now, you feel horrible. When he breaks NC, DON'T RESPOND! I know he's a guy, but sooner or later the light bulb will go off and he'll see he's wasting his time and he'll start breaking NC less and less and you'll be able to handle it more and more as you start to heal.
Author Sweet_T Posted May 6, 2011 Author Posted May 6, 2011 That is so true. And Im gonna make sure not to next time around. This is crazy! And I keep reverting to immature actions each time
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