so_mo34 Posted May 4, 2011 Share Posted May 4, 2011 so i am friends with this guy at work, but he considers me a good friend and i don't want to be his friend anymore because he is so unbelieveably annoying. he is like obsessed with me. he used to like me a lot but claims that he doesn't anymore but i don't really believe him. he knows i don't like him that way as i had to tell him like 10 times. anyways he is extremely needy and clingy. he gets too involved in my life and questions every thing i do. at work he gets all petty when i talk to people more than him at work. and then he goes on a rant complaining about it and saying how i ignore him. we got in so many fights about that kinda stuff and i tried a couple times to stop being friends with him but he gives me the guilt trip like "your such a good friend and your the only one i trust. i want to always have you as my friend and im going through a really hard time right now" and blah, blah, blah. he used to be addicted to painkillers and is going through treatment right now. this guy drives me insane and i don't want to be his friend anymore. he also texts me constantly. i feel like i am a bad person for not wanting to be his friend..am i? i just can't handle him. he is way too needy, clingy. super annoying and i just want him away from me. i talked to him about all this stuff before but he never changes and just makes up excuses. what do i do? wheneer i block him from texts, facebook, etc he freaks out and i also have to see him at work help! im like stuck but don't have the heart to tell him. Link to post Share on other sites
Felixtheecat Posted May 4, 2011 Share Posted May 4, 2011 I don't feel like you're a bad person for not wanting to be friends with him. As time proceeded you you gained a better perspective for who he is and it just so happened to be someone who pushed your buttons and made your life more difficult. Perhaps it should be mentioned to him that you will have to cut all ties with him if his behavior is not changed or improved. The sad fact of the matter is that he appears to be in love with you and I imagine that every time you show him kindness or friendship he sees that as some sort of sign if he keeps on working for you he can have you. I hope my thoughts are helpful Link to post Share on other sites
DreamerGirl27 Posted May 4, 2011 Share Posted May 4, 2011 Guys and girls make terrible friends, and this is why. Anything you do he will read into. He likes you, it's just natural. I suggest you cut all ties with him. Personally, I have no desire to be friends with anyone of the opposite sex unless I there is something there, anyway. It just leads to unwanted feelings and emotions on either both, but usually one side. Link to post Share on other sites
Badenov Posted June 2, 2011 Share Posted June 2, 2011 I used to be that guy. Don't listen to any of the above (no offense, people). The guy has self-esteem issues & feeds off of your attention. The more you withdraw the clingier he'll get. If you think he's a decent guy, sit him down & be honest. Tell him not to lose his dignity over you. Don't make it sound like rejection. Tell him he needs help, therapy, a GF, whatever. Don't BS him. If you truly care about him, let him know that. But be clear about needing your space. He needs to practice self-restraint. Set some ground rules: No initiating contact with you unless you do it first. No stalking. No jealousy. Encourage him to get out & make other friends, to socialize. You can help this guy realize his problem, or you can make it worse. Up to you. Link to post Share on other sites
aliceinchains Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 Looking at your other posts, you have a lot of problems at work. Do you still work there? Your other posts show you have self-esteem issues yourself, put yourself in his shoes, he has the self-esteem issues as well. My brother went through a painkiller addiction, it's a hard life he needs support but maybe you are not the right person to give it to him. People are not themselves when they are dealing with addiction. Just sit down and talk with him again, maybe he will realize he is better off without you. He may not realize that he is doing anything wrong if you don't tell him how he affects your life. Let him talk as well, don't make it all about you. It's all in the approach you take. Good Luck, keep us updated. Link to post Share on other sites
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