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Posted (edited)

Something came over me just now, this urge that I had to add another piece to the closure and moving on and then I looked at my phone and realized, I kept the last bit of text messages my xMW sent after we met up and ended over texts.

 

I held on to these texts to try to keep the memory alive in a lot of ways, though after the first few weeks I kept them there and didn't have the strength to delete them or re-read them and then there were the photo's from time we spent together.

 

Part of me knew I had to face them, re-read them, view them all again...take everything in and let them go, delete them.

 

It was so painful looking back at that night, the responses that followed and the silence.

 

We reached the end of our time and I hit the delete button on all the texts/pictures. Whatever memories I have will stay inside me and my peace will be knowing I lived this moment, good or bad, I lived it to the fullest extinct and I can truly be hopeful that better days are around the corner.

 

to quote the movie Inception, ' We had our time together, we built our world together, we grew old together... but I have to let you go. '

 

Every ending is the start of a new beginning, if we believe in ourselves.

 

-FC

Edited by FightClub
Posted

Happy to know you are another step forward, FC. I know how tough it is as it's only been 3 weeks NC for me. I have deleted EVERYTHING. Couldn't bear the thought of reading the messages, or seeing the photos. It would have me dwell big time... not that I am free from that just yet. Keep up the good work....

  • Author
Posted

Thanks, Siuys!

 

It finally felt like one of the last things I needed to do in order to move on, to let go of this and it feels vindicating in a way.

 

I hope you find some peace over the weeks, months and years.

 

Happiness is around the corner, I swear. =)

 

-FC

Posted

Congrats on hitting the Delete button! :)

Posted

:bunny:Congrats:bunny:, I am happy you had the strength to do that. It's hard to move forward living in the past. I hope though that you are not hurting immensely. I'm happy for you.:D

Posted

Congrats FC,

 

you will mourn it, eventually hate her and then move on like me.

 

Whatever the story looks like, only the result counts.

 

My motto is : If she really loved me, she would be with me.

 

All the reasons, rationalization, kids, good-guy H are B-S !

Posted

Wow!

 

Sounds like you are going to be good. I really liked your post because it was so honest and raw.

 

I wish you the best FC!

  • Author
Posted

Thanks everyone! :D

 

It was very hard to face it with my eyes wide open but I know in my heart...it was the right thing to do in order to move on.

 

-FC

  • Author
Posted

Also wanted to add a friend of mine summarized it quite well for me when she said, ' God does not give us anything we cannot handle.' Such a fitting statement for things that happen to each of us, regardless of the outcome. :)

 

-FC

Posted

Hang in there FC.........just wanted to let you know I'm in your corner and rooting for you. :)

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