Is there hope?

[Mary-Jane]

I have started talking to my ex of a few years around Christmas. We were sort of together until about 2005-6 then I met and fell in love with someone else but we stayed in limited contact, seeing each other as friends once or twice a year. He asked me to marry him several times during those years, but of course he had been seeing other women, and I wasn't interested in him in that way anyway. Now I suffered a complete fiasco with this other guy, I even had a thread here somewhere.

 

It's only recently that I started to feel I am coming back to life and also that I am actually interested in my ex. So over a few last months we started talking and actually meeting up but I have been holding off the sex for the reasons that I am not quite sure what's going on.

Firstly he doesn't seem to have time for me (I understand he's busy at work, but he's not prime minister), also what happened that he would make plans to go away for the weekend/go to the opera etc but it would never actually happen. Secondly when he did say that he really really wanted to see me regularly I asked him what exactly it was he wanted and if he wanted a relationship. He said if you're finally ready for one that is great news.

 

We met for lunch the next day (which was 28th of March), I had the most wonderful time, a few drinks, walk in the park, plans how now we can do all the normal regular stuff together, then he invited himself to my place for a "cup of tea" which naturally he wasn't interested in the slightest, but because he had to get back to the office later in the afternoon I didn't really want to sleep with him like that and feel abandoned afterwords, so I told him that relationships are not just sex, they are also about spiritual connection and showed him my drawings. He seemed to be interested, by the the middle of the second album he said ok, he understands - most people see about spiritual stuff in the beginning, but we will have to do it the other way around. Basically we had a laugh about it and he had to go anyway.

 

For the next week of so we kept in touch all the time, then suddenly I sent him a text (about nothing really, just said you've gone all quiet, you must be doing something really exciting)on a sunday night and he only replied 3 days later with "thank you it is exciting!". I didn't like it at all and replied that since it took him so long to answer I believe him that it is, and that was it. I didn't ask anything, he didn't say anything else. I had birthday couple of weeks later and he remembered and sent me a text, i asked him how he was and he said very well and that was it again. The easter holidays he supposedly spent with his children. I don't know if the prospect of a relationship with me filled him with so much joy and happiness that he got cold feet and had to run away or if there is another woman in the picture. I also think that if he wanted to get rid of me completely it would make sense for him not to remember my birthday.

 

My question is this - do I just leave it alone or might I get in touch with him myself - there are a couple events in June that I am taking part in and before all this happened he was very keen to come to both. So should I just invite him as if nothing has happened? Or would it be humiliation on my part?

 

Thank you