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Recap from the talk with the dept head


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Posted
she is not a girl for god's sake and your insistence on calling her that shows imo a lack of respect and maturity on your part. it's not cute and she would never find it cute that you insist on referring to her as a girl.

 

please take this the way it's intended to be you need to seriously grow up, i've been lurking here for a while and have read some of your posts and you really need to stop this type of behavior with women especially when they have very specifically told you NO and that they are not interested.

 

He won't stop. I say we all save this thread, as well as his other threads, and possibly submit them to the authorities for obvious stalking like behavior and mental in-stability.

  • Author
Posted

Why is it though in general when talking about women they're referred to as girls more often men are referred to as boys?

Posted
Why is it though in general when talking about women they're referred to as girls more often men are referred to as boys?

 

Are you really 60 years old and think you're still living in the 1950's where grown women were called girls as a way to demean them and undercut their value? how can you not understand this?

Posted

I can't believe this, but I'm actually going to agree with OG.

 

I see nothing wrong with calling a woman a girl. If anything, I see it as a compliment. I'm in my 40s and get called a girl often and it's certainly not meant to demean me in any way. Now if they call me a "little girl" - then I get pissed.

Posted

I don't see anything wrong with calling a woman a girl, either.

 

What bothers me is when they're called "females." Makes me want to slap the sexist pig who says it.

Posted
I can't believe this, but I'm actually going to agree with OG.

 

I see nothing wrong with calling a woman a girl. If anything, I see it as a compliment. I'm in my 40s and get called a girl often and it's certainly not meant to demean me in any way. Now if they call me a "little girl" - then I get pissed.

 

we'll have to agree to disagree, i find it utterly ridiculous and disrespectful that a man would call a grown woman a girl, she's a college professor with a phd

Posted

Yeah there are a number of things that OG does which are disagreeable... calling a woman a "girl" is not one of them. Adult men and women are called girls and boys in certain context all the time.

 

Heck... What person says Manfriend or Womanfriend instead of boyfriend and girlfriend?

Posted

What man says "That's my woman", instead of "that's my girl"?

 

Probably someone who's controlling and misogynistic.

Posted
I assume asking if i could take her out to lunch would be the same as a gift too which would be a no no? Not as a date though but just as a friendly thing.

 

Why are you talking about this again after saying you were going to let it go?

 

And, whatever you do, DO NOT take her summer course. If you do that, you're asking for alot of trouble!

Posted

Interesting debate. I had a conversation with some of my friends about it. We came up with some mathematical numbers for naming people.

 

For males you are a boy till about 15. Then from 16 to probably late 20s / early 30s you're a guy. And then after that you're often referred to as "man"

I'm 20 and personally I'd feel a little weird if someone kept referring to me as "that man." It's a little hard to get my head around. I prefer to just be called a guy.

 

For females we agreed it's best to call them girls till about late 20s. Then woman is probably more appropriate. And once you get to 45 or 50+ lady seems to be the best way to go.

My girlfriend is 21 and I would definetely refer to her as a "girl."

 

For OG's love interest though I think woman is probably the way to go, but I don't think "girl" would be too insulting.

 

P.S: how on earth did this topic go from giving presents to this?!

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Posted

I'm going to bed. Class in the morning. Wish me good luck!

 

Is there anything I can say that wont upset her and will leave a lasting impression since I was told I can't get her a gift? I thought about the taking her out to dinner thing, but problem is with my past conduct with her she would see that as a date, not a friendly gesture and would probably get me in trouble.

Posted

Why don't you get her a giftcard to a restaurant. Best of both worlds.

Posted
I'm going to bed. Class in the morning. Wish me good luck!

 

Is there anything I can say that wont upset her and will leave a lasting impression since I was told I can't get her a gift? I thought about the taking her out to dinner thing, but problem is with my past conduct with her she would see that as a date, not a friendly gesture and would probably get me in trouble.

Surprise with her with a passionate kiss.

 

Women love those. It will definitely leave a lasting impression.

Posted
Tomorrow is going to suck though. It will be sad that I wont see her anymore. Like I said I thought about taking her summer acting class, but I don't know what she would think about that.

It's pretty clear what she would think about that. It's exactly the fact that you can't figure out what she would think - in spite of ample, clear evidence - which is your problem.

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Posted
Why don't you get her a giftcard to a restaurant. Best of both worlds.

 

Dept head said they can't accept gifts.

Posted
Dept head said they can't accept gifts.

 

you really don't get it, considering what's already happened any gesture on your part will come off as weird and creepy. stop obsessing over this woman and move on with your life. she doesn't want to have breakfast, lunch, or dinner with you, she just wants you to leave her alone.

Posted

So many here don't get it.

 

The teacher in this situation could be made as wet as the ocean and as horny as a rabbit by one goal...

 

Even then she would have to say NO to any relationship with him, NO to any gifts, no NO no NOOOO. All because of the ethics reasons that some of us have said.

 

That and a bit of frustration on her part... especially if say OG is the only man comming on to her in a while... could explain her hostility to him.

 

That does not make him a creep. He is perhaps a bit naive.

 

Try to understand there is no circumstance where a teacher could date a student in one of their classes in this day and age and have it be ok.

Posted
So many here don't get it.

 

The teacher in this situation could be made as wet as the ocean and as horny as a rabbit by one goal...

 

Even then she would have to say NO to any relationship with him, NO to any gifts, no NO no NOOOO. All because of the ethics reasons that some of us have said.

 

That and a bit of frustration on her part... especially if say OG is the only man comming on to her in a while... could explain her hostility to him.

 

That does not make him a creep. He is perhaps a bit naive.

 

Try to understand there is no circumstance where a teacher could date a student in one of their classes in this day and age and have it be ok.

 

oh i totally get it, dealing with these type of creepy guys who can't take no for an answer can be both frustrating and scary. have you read some of his older threads? this is an ongoing pattern, he becomes obsessed with particular women and can't let go no matter how upfront and clear the object of his obsession is with him.

 

he has been encroaching on her as a professional, trying to dictate how she teaches her class, sending her tons of emails, going to the department head to snitch on her. yeah, she's just dying to go out with him.

Posted
Yeah there are a number of things that OG does which are disagreeable... calling a woman a "girl" is not one of them.

 

It is when she's his professor at college.

Posted
So many here don't get it.

 

The teacher in this situation could be made as wet as the ocean and as horny as a rabbit by one goal...

 

Yuck. That's a disturbing thing to read. What's your point? That she might have a physiological response to a person who she absolutely does not like or want to have anything to do with, on any level, for many reasons?

 

Even then she would have to say NO to any relationship with him, NO to any gifts, no NO no NOOOO. All because of the ethics reasons that some of us have said.

 

That and a bit of frustration on her part... especially if say OG is the only man comming on to her in a while... could explain her hostility to him.

 

That does not make him a creep. He is perhaps a bit naive.

 

Try to understand there is no circumstance where a teacher could date a student in one of their classes in this day and age and have it be ok.

 

No need for the condescending tone, Mr. Lonely. Nobody needs to "try" to understand this. It's rudimentary. That said, there are plenty of students messing around with their professors, even though it's forbidden. Obviously, right or wrong, the people involved WANT to mess around with each other in those cases. Which is clearly NOT the case here.

 

The teacher / student relationship is kind of a side issue. Bottom line is she clearly, absolutely has let him know - more than once - in many ways - that she IS NOT INTERESTED IN HIM, WILL NOT GO OUT WITH HIM, DOES NOT WANT TO HEAR FROM HIM, DOES NOT WANT TO GET A GIFT FROM HIM, DOES NOT EVEN WANT TO HAVE EYE CONTACT WITH HIM, WANTS HIM TO STAY FAR, FAR AWAY FROM HER. Her reasons for all of that are kind of inconsequential, though interesting to discuss.

 

Mr. Lonely, from some of your threads I have gathered that you don't really believe women who tell you "no" either. Why don't you change that.

 

Also, I've read through some of OG's threads. If he's not trolling, he definitely IS a creeper. It would not take a clairvoyant woman to pick up on this and reinforce all boundaries as solidly as possible. Sadly, in this case, she is forced into contact with him because he's in her class.

 

Unless he's a fun loving troll, that is.

  • Author
Posted

Well class is over. It went smooth. However I didn't get a chance to talk to her after class much because she was talking to one of her favorites and didn't want to be bothered. I did tell her very briefly I enjoyed her class and would leave a good comment on rate my professor. She said thanks.

 

I'll probably sent her a email later and wish her luck.

 

It was a little sad, but I'll get over her hopefully within a few weeks or so.

Posted (edited)
The teacher in this situation could be made as wet as the ocean and as horny as a rabbit by one goal...

 

Confusing a physical response to stimuli with overall desire or wishes is a very dangerous and harmful attitude. Take, for instance, male rape. If someone was to rape you, you might ejaculate because of the pressure on the prostate gland. That doesn't mean you enjoyed being raped, but your attitude that physical arousal means something more than what it is will make you feel guilty for cumming.

Edited by betterdeal
Posted
Well class is over. It went smooth. However I didn't get a chance to talk to her after class much because she was talking to one of her favorites and didn't want to be bothered. I did tell her very briefly I enjoyed her class and would leave a good comment on rate my professor. She said thanks.

 

I'll probably sent her a email later and wish her luck.

 

It was a little sad, but I'll get over her hopefully within a few weeks or so.

 

Yeah, I bet she really appreciated that rating thought, after you reamed her on the class evaluation.

 

Do not send her an email. Wishing her luck? She will be luckiest if you leave her alone.

Posted

On May 3rd you posted:

 

"Today was teacher reviews so we had to evaluate the teacher on a form. I didn't give her good remarks like I usually give teachers."

 

Then today, you told her:

 

"I did tell her very briefly I enjoyed her class and would leave a good comment on rate my professor. She said thanks."

  • Author
Posted
Yeah, I bet she really appreciated that rating thought, after you reamed her on the class evaluation.

 

Do not send her an email. Wishing her luck? She will be luckiest if you leave her alone.

 

I didn't give her a bad review. Most of the things I gave her a good mark, except for a couple things that said she needs to improve a bit on.

 

here is my email i sent her.

 

I didn't get to really talk to you much after class today, but I

really want to thank you for being such a wonderful teacher. Your

class is one of the few classes I actually looked forward waking up in

the morning to go to. I had a lot of fun and I'm glad I chose your

class for my last semester at stlcc. I know I caused some problems for

you, but that's in the past now.

I just want to tell you good luck with everything xxx and I wish

nothing but the best for you in the future.

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