Author one goal Posted May 6, 2011 Author Posted May 6, 2011 The thing that gets me is that she says my emails were inappropriate. I didn't say anything harassing to her. So that's the part I disagree with.
jerbear Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 so no it's not like I constantly bugged her for a actual DATE every time I saw her and every day emailing her about it.Constantly is not everyday. Over the course of the semester you did bug her on individual activities that can be construed as dates. Asking her out by email, verbally asking her, sending an FB request, threatening to go over her head, giving her a negative review, etc... You are really bugging her. Have you ever been diagnosed with Asperger or Autism? You might want to seek medical attention. You are showing signs of social ineptitude, unhealthy obsessions / fascinations, unmanaged expectations, and passive aggressiveness.
Author one goal Posted May 6, 2011 Author Posted May 6, 2011 Constantly is not everyday. Over the course of the semester you did bug her on individual activities that can be construed as dates. Asking her out by email, verbally asking her, sending an FB request, threatening to go over her head, giving her a negative review, etc... You are really bugging her. Have you ever been diagnosed with Asperger or Autism? You might want to seek medical attention. You are showing signs of social ineptitude, unhealthy obsessions / fascinations, unmanaged expectations, and passive aggressiveness. Well I was kinda persistant I was hoping she would cave in and agree to go out once. I went to the head because it was getting out of hand, and I wanted to be upfront about it before I was about to get into trouble. Turns out the department chair told me that the teacher was showing her some of the emails all along.
LexiB Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 Well I was kinda persistant I was hoping she would cave in and agree to go out once. I went to the head because it was getting out of hand, and I wanted to be upfront about it before I was about to get into trouble. Turns out the department chair told me that the teacher was showing her some of the emails all along. Can you say, duh? That's what any normal person would have done in her position. You have no right to be offended or even surprised for that matter at anything she's done. Dude, grow the hell up.
jerbear Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 Well I was kinda persistant I was hoping she would cave in and agree to go out once. I went to the head because it was getting out of hand, and I wanted to be upfront about it before I was about to get into trouble. Turns out the department chair told me that the teacher was showing her some of the emails all along. The chair and your teacher knew better and took it out of your hand. Your dept head is being nice to you by telling you to stop, instead of sending you to the disciplinary board and getting you expelled.
Author one goal Posted May 6, 2011 Author Posted May 6, 2011 What was embarassing is when she was talking to me yesterday in the stern, loud tone of voice about not emailing her anymore or she would escalate it, there was another student waiting to talk to her. She kinda stepped out the door when the teacher started talking to me about it she was so loud. So I'm sure she heard most of it. Just really embarassing. I noticed when I ask to talk to her she ask what for, and doesn't want to talk to me alone in class when everyone leaves. She really tries to avoid being alone when talking to me lately. I don't talk to her anymore. If she hates me that bad, and wants to treat me and scoled me like a child I don't want to be her friend. She really was in a defensive mode.
jerbear Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 When does a thread get closed? :lmao::lmao: What was embarassing is when she was talking to me yesterday in the stern, loud tone of voice about not emailing her anymore or she would escalate it, there was another student waiting to talk to her. She kinda stepped out the door when the teacher started talking to me about it she was so loud. So I'm sure she heard most of it. Just really embarassing. I noticed when I ask to talk to her she ask what for, and doesn't want to talk to me alone in class when everyone leaves. She really tries to avoid being alone when talking to me lately. I don't talk to her anymore. If she hates me that bad, and wants to treat me and scoled me like a child I don't want to be her friend. She really was in a defensive mode.She gave you multiple hints to stop. You won't stop. So she has to be professional and be direct to the point. So don't be her friend, stop trying to be her friend, her lover, or whatever. Finish the course and go find another woman. Someone that actually appreciates your advances.
Author one goal Posted May 6, 2011 Author Posted May 6, 2011 None of them appreciate me! So I decided to try a older chick. That too once again didn't work out! Only one that did was almost two years ago. The super hot chick in my PE class at school I talked to her for awhile until I finally asked her out. I actually got her cell number, but it turns out she had a boyfriend so she decided not to go out. You don't understand everytime I try it doesn't work out, or I get ignored!!
dreamingoftigers Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 None of them appreciate me! So I decided to try a older chick. That too once again didn't work out! Only one that did was almost two years ago. The super hot chick in my PE class at school I talked to her for awhile until I finally asked her out. I actually got her cell number, but it turns out she had a boyfriend so she decided not to go out. You don't understand everytime I try it doesn't work out, or I get ignored!! Yeah, like all 3 times!
Professor X Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 When does a thread get closed? When you stop replying to him with all seriousness; If you haven't noticed he isn't interested in anyones advice. He completely ignores parts that don't promote his story in a certain way. If you say something about his personality or what he should or shouldn't do, it'll get ignored. If he was a real person and not a troll, he'd need help from a professional, not us.
Lilmisus Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 When does a thread get closed? This one needs to be locked like his other one did the other day. But I don't think it will really matter until the last day of class - when he will probably post one last thread about her. At least I hope it will be the last thread. So till then, we need to realize that all the answers are out there for him to have access to, and to stop answering his questions. Which..wont happen. People like talking to a brick wall hoping to get through to it
anne1707 Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 Don't worry. If OG carries on in his usual posting style, he will stop posting for a few months and then come back with another sorry tale of stalking and harassment. Just look at his past threads and you will see that he has been doing this kind of thing for years
Mme. Chaucer Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 It's amusing that he has the same initials as our erstwhile friend, Ocean Girl.
Mrlonelyone Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 One goal and everyone else here let me break what's happening down for you. This demonstrates why personalizing a relationship with a teacher is more dangerous than any other work place relationship. Is one goal a horrible stalkerish creepy pervert who harassed that poor sweet woman. NO! One goal asked the woman out. Like so many women she then thought one of two things. 1.)I don't find him attractive therefore he's a creepy stalkerish pervert but I have power over him so I will use it to make him miserable for having ever even looked at me. Dosen't this guy know that a teacher can't date a student at their school for ethical reasons anyway? 2.)I find him attractive but I can't date him for ethical reasons. This is so frustrating and annoying... I wish he would just go away! Wait I have the power to make him miserable for making me miserable.. In short weather she was attracted to him or not the result would be the same unless the woman was willing to jeapaordize her career. A rejection...followed by a woman reacting in the way that contemporary society has conditioned them to react to being approached by a man they don't want for whatever reason. My advice: Don't say anything to her. Actively IGNORE HER. Then anything that she does at that point is on her. If she gives you a grade you can prove you do not deserve or anything like that you can complain. Doccument what that department head said because to be honest it was unprofessional. I know what the people here will say but it was unprofessional. Then sit on it. If either of them makes one false move hire a lawyer and prepare to go to the dean. Consider that you might want a lawyer too at that point. I have sued a school successfully for discriminating against me on the basis of my race and my alternative gender identity. Those people don't just get to do whatever the heck they want.
Kamille Posted May 6, 2011 Posted May 6, 2011 1.)I don't find him attractive therefore he's a creepy stalkerish pervert but I have power over him so I will use it to make him miserable for having ever even looked at me. Dosen't this guy know that a teacher can't date a student at their school for ethical reasons anyway? 2.)I find him attractive but I can't date him for ethical reasons. This is so frustrating and annoying... I wish he would just go away! Wait I have the power to make him miserable for making me miserable.. You have a scientific mind, so I will ask you this: where exactly is the proof that this professor tried to make OG feel miserable?
Author one goal Posted May 7, 2011 Author Posted May 7, 2011 You have a scientific mind, so I will ask you this: where exactly is the proof that this professor tried to make OG feel miserable? She makes me miserable the way she treated me and how shes been snappy lately and went off on me yesterdAy.
Jazzari Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 "Hot chick who hates me" = Love I can see why your feeling are hurt. The emotional bond you've built with her is deep. Just think of all you've been through together. All those nights spent baring your souls, talking about your dreams and ambitions. The times you were there for each other. The shared laughter and tears. Oh yeah, and she's HOT!!
Kamille Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 She makes me miserable the way she treated me and how shes been snappy lately and went off on me yesterdAy. When you say she "went off" on you, you actually mean she did this: She did reitirate to me again every is fine as long as I don't send her any emails ever again or she will escalate the matter and take action. I told her rest assure and told her I appreciate her kindness and that I'm thankful how she handled this without getting me in serious trouble. Again she was very stern with it and serious dont p*ss me off look. I only have one last class left with her and I'm done! One thing I want to comment is on body language. Before class she was going around and handing papers back to us. When she handed my paper back she didn't say anything and even kinda turned away from me when handing it to me so she didn't have to look at me. I guess that means she doesn't even want simple interaction with her she's trying to tell me. That's not "going off" on you. That's trying to establish firm boundaries, making sure you get the point she's not interested, all while remaining professional. Congratulations on your A+ by the way.
irc333 Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Just wait until you graduate, then contact her on FB again, because that way action can't be taken to be kicked out school because you'll already have graduated and gone. lol j/k
TheyCallMeBruce Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 Seems oddly relevant: http://centralrecorder.com/2011/05/06/adjunct-professor-accused-of-sexual-misconduct/
Author one goal Posted May 7, 2011 Author Posted May 7, 2011 When you say she "went off" on you, you actually mean she did this: That's not "going off" on you. That's trying to establish firm boundaries, making sure you get the point she's not interested, all while remaining professional. Congratulations on your A+ by the way. Well it was in a loud tone, and she had a mean look on her face too. She was not happy.
Kamille Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 (edited) Well it was in a loud tone, and she had a mean look on her face too. She was not happy. She spoke in a loud tone and with a mean look when she told you she would escalate things if you kept contacting her? Shocker! I always like to use a light-hearted tone and a Valley girl accent when I threaten people with potential consequences should they continue to ignore my boundaries. Threats are much more cute with an up tilt, you know? Seriously though: you complained to her supervisor about her "mean" behavior, this, after you spent nearly 2 months ignoring all her attempts at ignoring you. You pushed her boundaries until she had no choice but to put you in your place and then you complained about it - to her supervisor. I'm amazed she still manages to be civil to you. She deserves a medal. Edited May 7, 2011 by Kamille
Star Gazer Posted May 7, 2011 Posted May 7, 2011 If I were the professor, I'd be fearful for my life. Honestly.
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