am i doing the right thing???

[missconfused83]

so a few months ago my bf broke up with me. we've known each other for a really long time but were only together for about 6 months. when he ended it he didnt actually end anything, he said he needed to breath and that things were happening in his life that were effecting us so it was for the best. well he said those things and i complied, i began the NC rule and wanted to get on with my life but then he kept calling and texting me asking to see me and acting like we were still together. he said if i were to sleep with anyone else it would really hurt him and that he just needed time but would make it right again. that went on for a little while but i finally got fed up and again tried the NC thing for a bit but then he came back and offered to help me with a few financial matters but just as "a friend" so i agreed and we started talking again on a more regular basis. i was doing really good for a while keeping things strictly platonic but as time went on we started talking about us again and sharing memories and laughs and i could feel myself falling for him all over but i know he has another woman in his life already so i keep him at a safe distance only talking on the phone or via text, never meeting up with him unless for $$$ purposes however within the last few weeks i find myself going out with my friends having a few drinks and thinking about him which is leading to calling or messaging him when im too tipsy to remember and having to explain why i called him 10 times at 4am then got angry and called him names and deleted him from my contacts. it happened again this past weekend and i finally told him enough is enough. I NEED TO BREATH NOW! i need to move on with my life and let go of these feelings im harboring or this will keep happening over and over. he said this makes him sad and that im the one who said its ok we could still try to be friends with no hard feelings but i told him i just cant do that right now, its not working for me. i do love him still, a lot, so knowing that i think its inappropriate to keep contact since he should be working on the relationship he's already in now. he just makes me feel really bad when i try to wean myself off from this whole thing and he ALWAYS ends up contacting me within a few days tops so i dont know if im doing the right thing or not. anyone have any suggestions??? im really confused here