Lower my standards: what does that even mean?

[Rinnix]

Ok you should stop this now. There are thousand of lonely geeky guys on LS and pretty soon they are all going to start migrating to Canada!

I'm not even lonely but I might be starting to develop my first internet crush. Better go take a cold shower and try to refocus on this stupid assignment.

 

Its always worth a visit to Canada

[thebody]

BTW, this is me with some very clever angles and lighting

 

Don't take this the wrong way, please... but a little bit of exercise and a proper nutrition plan will have you looking like Brad Pitt. Maybe I'm a little biased on the fitness thing but... maybe I can give you a quick couple pointers to get cut up a bit.

 

About the movie, it tells about all the genetic and hormonal traits women and men find attractive and why. Symmetry is one thing they go into... there's an equation for facial symmetry that both sexes are attracted to. There's the proper balance of hormones in either body... those same hormones present certain physical traits. It goes on about many of the things we don't even notice or why we find them attractive in the first place.

[somedude81]

a- if THAT is the kind of nerdy you want. Finish your studies and move to Japan. You will be beating them off with a stick.

Just so you know, the first girl I linked to was the one who I was talking about biting the bullet. Though I'd be happy with the next two.

 

You know, I am really considering moving to Japan.

 

I've already done three semesters of Japanese but it's so hard. Though I have heard it's easier to learn a language when you are living there.

b- I think you missed my point. I'm not talking about girls who go to salsa clubs I'm talking about girls who don't but want to learn salsa. Almost every girl I've dated has at some point expressed interest in taking up dancing classes. I have a friend who used to be a salsa instructor and he pulls so many girls. Not the ones in his classes but the ones who he meets in other places, tells them about his job/hobby and suggests teaching them some moves sometime.

When I've told girls that I know how to dance, none of them really seemed to care. Actually, only the married women in their 40's care.

 

I haven't seen any benefit at all and it's a pain going out dancing because I can never find a partner.

 

You look in shape, though theres no face shown, theres no reason for you to be deemed undateable.

 

Everyone has a different eye for beauty, some people wouldn't give me a second look. While others think I'm cute.

 

A face refrence would have been better mind you.

I rather not show my face here because I tend to talk about very personal, sometimes embarrassing stuff that I don't want people to associate with me in real life. Though I did have my picture up here for an hour or so and posted it in one of the rating threads. I got scored a 6.5 even though I wasn't smiling. Don't forget that I'm also pretty short.

 

Since I know I'm not undatable, I think the real reason is that a lot of women are just too shallow.

 

And no you don't have anything to worry about for looks.

I think it's just the girls your after. Not everyone has unrealistic expectations.

In our age range it is expected though. You just have to search deeper.

You seem like a overall catch, don't be so jaded.

 

Many girls want just what you have to offer. You don't need to look like Enrique to get a date.

If it's expected for that age range then what should I do? I've been at this for a long time so I'm starting to lose hope.

Edited May 2, 2011 by somedude81

[thatdog]

Yup. Japanese is hard. I lived there for almost 4 years and still got nowhere with it. I regret it though because I kinda gave up once I realized how easy it was to get around without knowing the language. Life's a lot easier if you do, but not being able to speak Japanese should in no way make it difficult to live there for a while if you are in the Tokyo area at least.

 

re girls not interested in dancing. Sorry I might be wrong. I don;t dance so it was just an observation from what i've seen. But I am kinda surprised though.

 

Dammit stop posting. this thread is too distracting and I'm not getting any work done. Noone post here any more today please unless you know something about administrative law

[Rinnix]

Big whoop about being rated. I have had people look at me and list all my 'ugly' features to my face.

 

I have been rated from as low as a 4 to as high as a 9-9.5.

Just because people gave you a 6.5 it doesn't mean thats how you look.

 

And being short is not a bad thing. Most tiny girls wont care as long as your at least an inch taller then them.

 

The problem with our range is that people don't look at the entire package.

You focus so much on the negative, look at yourself and see the positive features that you have to offer.

 

As soon as you recognize them, you will have more confidence when dating.

[Els]

I guess I would term it as 'Think about what you really, really cannot do without, and prune whatever you can. Also be sure that the things you really want in a girl are those that you yourself want, and not those that society dictates you should want'.

 

Based on what you've said in the boards, I would not term you as overly picky, though.

[Els]

Sadly IME that's about the worst preference to have. Getting a girl like that is like trying to score a model. They are like the personality equivalent of models. Models are in high demand cos they tick almost all the boxes for what guys generally find physically attractive so theres a million guys out there who want a girl who looks like that and not that many girls. Now consider how many GUYs like anime and video games compared to GIRLS who like that stuff. Unless you live in Japan or Korea you are pretty much screwed. Pretty much every average+ looking girl i've met with that kind of personality has had a stack of guys chasing them. After 15 years of looking I count myself lucky I've found a gf that just likes tetris, Katamari and One Piece (though fortunately Ive pretty much outgrown anime anyhow)

 

Eh, I'd beg to differ. I definitely didn't have 'a million guys lining up to be with me', and definitely not as many as a model does, although admittedly I probably had more guys interested in me than girls who looked a little better but had conventional (or no) hobbies. You forget the part that even geek guys sometimes want the model - they would probably prefer a model who games, but for some of them, if they absolutely had to choose, they would definitely chuck the 'geek' part out and retain the 'model' part.

 

Or maybe I didn't even look average back when I was single. In that case, well, oy vey.

[Els]

 

Ugh, my life would have been so much easier if I was born a woman and kept all my current interests.

 

You would be surprised. It's not often fun being the 'weird one' and finding it difficult to make friends with those of the same gender. In fact, you will find it difficult making close friends at all, because you will naturally tend towards those with similar hobbies, but those being mainly guys, there will always be an unbreachable wall between both of you preventing you from truly being best buds, and a lot of drama if the guy developes a crush on you.

[Eclypse]

Aren't I lucky then my girlfriend is heavily into anime and all sorts of video games while I can't stand the stuff! I'd never have guessed it from looking at her. She has a wardrobe the size of my room and spends hours doing her makeup. She looks a little like Rinnix actually... and is from Canada also come to think of it... So really you can never know who is a fan until you meet them. I bet there's heaps more girls like that out there than you think, just waiting for you!

 

Me personally I don't care as long as she doesn't dress up in that "lolita" fashion or drag me along to those silly conventions I'm as happy as can be. She made me watch something called Naruto. Thankfully it wasn't long as it was pure torture! All kidding aside it's nice to date someone who isn't a "party girl" as most 21 year olds are and prefers movie nights and cuddles. It's a good demographic to aim for.

 

Somedude don't lower your standards, you won't feel good if you are with someone you aren't truly attracted to. And it wouldn't be nice to that girl if you jerked her along. You can't control your attractions. The right person will come along when you least expect and it will hit you like a ton of bricks and you'll be over the moon. I think you should look to broaden your dating pool. You may have shot your last arrow with this current batch of girls in your friendship group. Perhaps there is a family friend you can be introduced to? That's how I met my gf after having exhausted the supply of girls at uni.