karina.cortez Posted May 1, 2011 Posted May 1, 2011 I'm currently a high school freshman and a group of girls dared me to kicked a guy they hate (he's a sophomore, one year ahead of all of us) in the his nuts. I didn't really wanted to proceed to it but after so much hesitation did it. I didn't realized it would cause him that much pain. I was thinking it would be like in the movies in which it stings for a bit but he's better in no time. It wasn't like this. He threw up afterwards and was absent the next day. There girls who used to teased constantly are now my friends after I did that but I still feel terrible. Is he going to be ok? Did I really ruined him? I have apologized countless times and even wrote a letter but he doesn't even want to see my face and ripped the letter.
Author karina.cortez Posted May 1, 2011 Author Posted May 1, 2011 All the girls who dared me to do this were laughing but I felt terrible from the start and still do. I can't sleep sometimes without thinking about what I did.
D-Lish Posted May 1, 2011 Posted May 1, 2011 All the girls who dared me to do this were laughing but I felt terrible from the start and still do. I can't sleep sometimes without thinking about what I did. Good, glad you can't sleep- you should feel bad, you should have this kind of response to being so cruel to another human being, because what you did was horrible. You embarrassed him, you humiliated him, you degraded him- and you should feel bad.
Author karina.cortez Posted May 1, 2011 Author Posted May 1, 2011 Good, glad you can't sleep- you should feel bad, you should have this kind of response to being so cruel to another human being, because what you did was horrible. You embarrassed him, you humiliated him, you degraded him- and you should feel bad.I have never hit nor done this to anyone in my life. If there was a way to go back in time, I would have rejected the dare, rejected their friendship and still stay happily as a loner with few friends.
Dust Posted May 1, 2011 Posted May 1, 2011 You’re not being honest with yourself if you believed that type of thing wasn’t very painful. Movies typically depict that type of thing as being very painful. If a man were to kick you right between the legs that would be painful and you don’t have anything there. You can cause permanent damage by hitting a man there but hopefully the boy you hit will still be able to have children.
Author karina.cortez Posted May 1, 2011 Author Posted May 1, 2011 You’re not being honest with yourself if you believed that type of thing wasn’t very painful. Movies typically depict that type of thing as being very painful. If a man were to kick you right between the legs that would be painful and you don’t have anything there.Well I had an idea that it would hurt (the reason I kept hesitating the beginning) but didn't realize it would go to that extreme level of pain. That was the first time I ever saw a guy crying that much and throwing up. I just kept saying things like Omg you ok, I'm sorry, I'm sorry while my friends pulled me away and told me he deserved it. They told me that it's no big deal and that they had done this on several guys too. I don't think it's funny at all seeing someone in pain. You can cause permanent damage by hitting a man there but hopefully the boy you hit will still be able to have children.Oh nooooooo. I wasn't thinking what I was doing. I really wasn't.
VicJay79 Posted May 1, 2011 Posted May 1, 2011 Katrina, Shame on you. That is a very painful thing to do to someone. You are lucky he didn't hit you back, he showed more class then you did. Your best bet is learn from this experience and grow up. I'm currently a high school freshman and a group of girls dared me to kicked a guy they hate (he's a sophomore, one year ahead of all of us) in the his nuts. I didn't really wanted to proceed to it but after so much hesitation did it. I didn't realized it would cause him that much pain. I was thinking it would be like in the movies in which it stings for a bit but he's better in no time. It wasn't like this. He threw up afterwards and was absent the next day. There girls who used to teased constantly are now my friends after I did that but I still feel terrible. Is he going to be ok? Did I really ruined him? I have apologized countless times and even wrote a letter but he doesn't even want to see my face and ripped the letter.
Author karina.cortez Posted May 2, 2011 Author Posted May 2, 2011 Why did those girls hate him in the first place?I heard that he's a player that changes girls every month after breaking up with them. Other than that I don't know. I'm really tired of their conversations and how they think this is funny but can't do nothing. Wish there was a way I can tell the boy I'm really sorry but was practically forced to else those girls wouldn't be my friends.
Author karina.cortez Posted May 2, 2011 Author Posted May 2, 2011 I was sick of being teased everyday by those girls. Everyday it was either a false rumor said about me or name calling so I accepted their dare. They were watching so I couldn't really back up at that moment.
VicJay79 Posted May 2, 2011 Posted May 2, 2011 Karina, You need new friends, and you need to talk to someone in your school about bullying. You have the right to enjoy going to school without being intimidated or harassed. If you don't stand up for yourself, no one else will. I was sick of being teased everyday by those girls. Everyday it was either a false rumor said about me or name calling so I accepted their dare. They were watching so I couldn't really back up at that moment.
Author karina.cortez Posted May 2, 2011 Author Posted May 2, 2011 Karina, You need new friends, and you need to talk to someone in your school about bullying. You have the right to enjoy going to school without being intimidated or harassed. If you don't stand up for yourself, no one else will.I know but after what I did it's like I'm no better than them. The boy I kicked for sure must now be hating because deceiving was also involved in this dare. I was pretending to befriend him (make him think I want to get to know him) and then take him by surprise. Those girls are my friends now but I'm starting to think it was better when they weren't. I can't stand them at all. I'm thinking of sending everything to hell and wanting nothing to do with their talks nor stories about how they kick guys in the nuts. I wanted the teasing to stop and got my wish but think I should have been careful what I wished for. I feel this is worst than before.
Author karina.cortez Posted May 2, 2011 Author Posted May 2, 2011 I actually wanted to go to the principal's office that day and inform him what I did but my ''friends'' pulled me away. I don't know, I still feel like telling because this is something out of my character that I wouldn't have done it on my own will. So if I were to tell the principal about this by tomorrow about last month's incident, what punishment do I get? I'm ready for whatever comes.
mark982 Posted May 3, 2011 Posted May 3, 2011 you're lucky he didn't have you arrested for assualt. good lord girl, grow up. quit playing these little girl drama games. except this game you could of seriously done damage to another person. this is about the only reason i think, were it's ok to strike back at a female.
tyciol Posted May 8, 2011 Posted May 8, 2011 (edited) Katrina I think you should keep trying. You've probably negatively impacted this guy's view of society, females, not to mention his health. No I don't think you've "ruined" him, because I don't think any human is a ruin unless we die, and this guy is very much alive. Understand that he would be angry and upset and untrustworthy. For all he knows, apology letters may be part of an elaborate plot to hurt him again. Your friends do not sound like good people. I think if you legitimately feel bad about this, you should express your anger with them for pushing you to do something so violent and cruel. You should also examine your own motivations: could you be led by peer pressure to do something you don't want to like this again? One option, if you have the guts: offer to go off alone with this guy somewhere and let him kick you in the groin. He may or may not do it, but I think it would be a fair gesture. Tit for tat and so forth. I have never hit nor done this to anyone in my life.Until now =) Another option: you can offer to nurse him back to health. He may still be very swollen down there, perhaps you could offer to stop by his house and change his ice packs, make him some food. Walking itself might be painful, and he may not be able to socialize like he used to for physical and mental/emotional reasons. Having some company and showing you care are the main things I see as having a chance to reconcile something this bad. I heard that he's a player that changes girls every month after breaking up with them. Other than that I don't know.This is still no reason to attack him. Even if he went so far as to beat his girlfriends you should have reported him to the police. Assaulting someone because they don't carry on long-term relationships and are attracted to multiple people is barbaric. I'm really tired of their conversations and how they think this is funny but can't do nothing. Wish there was a way I can tell the boy I'm really sorryYou can tell him you're sorry, over and over, and hope maybe he'll believe it. Just invest your time. Make making amends a total nuisance for your life. Eventually he's bound to observe that the time you're investing is probably too much for a simple prank and that you legitimately care. Also: try not to do it in front of other people unless he asks you to, to avoid him assuming you're doing it for the benefit of your image rather than him. was practically forced to else those girls wouldn't be my friends.More good advice: rid yourself of these dishonest analogies. There's very little in common between FORCE and you attacking people to earn friendship. Perhaps there as people in such situations in street gangs where it is a matter of "rob that old man or we kill you", but your situation doesn't seem like that. That it seemed practically like force to you shows a problem in how you perceive peer pressure. I was sick of being teased everyday by those girls. Everyday it was either a false rumor said about me or name calling so I accepted their dare. They were watching so I couldn't really back up at that moment.Yes, you could back up at that moment. You could say "no, I don't want to kick him. I apologize for saying I would." I don't think you should expect the name-calling or rumours to stop. If they've waned briefly it's likely only because they're distracted. I actually wanted to go to the principal's office that day and inform him what I did but my ''friends'' pulled me away. I don't know, I still feel like telling because this is something out of my character that I wouldn't have done it on my own will. So if I were to tell the principal about this by tomorrow about last month's incident, what punishment do I get? I'm ready for whatever comes.We don't know what your principal will issue as punishment, but it does seem like the right thing to do. Before that though, you could ask the guy if he would want you to tell the principal or not. Giving him that choice could be empowering. Perhaps he'd be willing to forgive you, or perhaps he would want you to tell the principal. Either way, I think if you have his permission to tell the principal and he's co-operative, whatever punishment you get for it would be lighter. Edited May 8, 2011 by tyciol
VicJay79 Posted May 9, 2011 Posted May 9, 2011 Karina, In a way we are all proud of you. The fact this is being discussed online shows that you care as a human being, and understand you made a mistake. Honestly, you really need to start seeking help from a Guidence counslor and work through some of these things. Karina, your lucky to have learned this lesson now, as opposed to many of these poor saps that will realize this WAY later in their life, and be really unhappy. The "Golden Rule" always applies, but don't expect it to always be given to you. Many people just don't know yet.... This will be one of the mistakes you will regret, don't make more of them. Stay away from people that don't make you a better person, and leverage your ability to not get bullied or harrassed. This stuff is serious, and you should really let your principal know... QUOTE=karina.cortez;3377157]I actually wanted to go to the principal's office that day and inform him what I did but my ''friends'' pulled me away. I don't know, I still feel like telling because this is something out of my character that I wouldn't have done it on my own will. So if I were to tell the principal about this by tomorrow about last month's incident, what punishment do I get? I'm ready for whatever comes.
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