SlowBlues Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 And I feel awful now. I thought about her constantly for those 6 weeks while I worked on myself and improved my own situation and then all of a sudden she messages me out of the blue (I am the dumpee btw). She had a moment of emotional weakness and got sad and decided to text me to see how I was doing. We exchanged a few messages and she basically updated me on what she has been up to while I basically listened and responded in a kind fashion. She apologized for messaging me out of the blue and said she knew it was unfair of her to do it after so long. I said she didn't need to apologize, it was nice to hear from her and I'm glad she seems to be doing okay (despite the fact that I could tell she was messaging me instinctively because she was feeling emotional). I told her I had to go to sleep and we said goodnight. Honestly I felt great afterward and for the next day, knowing that she obviously still has feelings for me. This is a girl I love very much and hope to reconcile with eventually but I know we need to be apart for a while. Ever since then though I have felt awful. I don't blame her for getting emotional and I do think she genuinely wanted to know how I was doing but it has really set me back more than I thought it would. That good feeling I got after hearing from her quickly faded and I am left back in NC feeling just as anxious. I am alternating between bouts of hope, anger and extreme anxiety. It's hard to gauge where things are at right now. I definitely don't think that the chances of reconciliation have lessened from the contact but I think at the same time my emotional state has been hurt again and I know that I have to go back into NC to begin healing again. This just goes to show for those of you who are dumpees and have been in NC for a while, sometimes receiving contact from the dumper doesn't have the effect that you think it may have. I've learned a ton from reading these boards over the last 2 months.I definitely had a moment of weakness caused by her moment of weakness, but all I can do now is try and stay strong, stick with NC and try to keep my emotions in check. Writing these things down here definitely makes me feel better.
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