nyckidd Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 I looked at my exes facebook, and her latest post was "Such a perfect night )" I shouldnt have even went on. I feel like shi* now just wondering what she was doing. Any advice? I am so tempeted to contact her but I wont. She dumped me on sudsay by the way.
Ginger Beer Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 We've all done it. Try not to think about it. And don't do it again.
Hopeless Girl Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 dont call her.. dont take it personal.. she need times for her and to clear her mind... just like what you should be doing.. luck
Author nyckidd Posted April 30, 2011 Author Posted April 30, 2011 yea your right, her relationship status is still in a relationship, and so is mine. Should I change mine to single, because I feel like I keep it the way it is for nothing.
Author nyckidd Posted April 30, 2011 Author Posted April 30, 2011 dont call her.. dont take it personal.. she need times for her and to clear her mind... just like what you should be doing.. luck yea your right, her relationship status is still in a relationship, and so is mine. Should I change mine to single, because I feel like I keep it the way it is for nothing.
knathema Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 I looked at my exes facebook, and her latest post was "Such a perfect night )" I shouldnt have even went on. I feel like shi* now just wondering what she was doing. Any advice? I am so tempeted to contact her but I wont. She dumped me on sudsay by the way. you really really have to fight your urges to look at your ex's fb. Think of it this way, even if you know what she is doing, is it going to change the reality? While it might fulfill your curiosity but you will end up hurting again. Focus on yourself and be happy again like you were before you even met her. It's been 2 week NC for me, no fb no nothing. It will get better, be strong! and good luck
Layzie89 Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 Post breakup: Facebook = Devil. Unfriend her, block her or deactivate your fb all together. That site will bring you nothing but pain and further heartbreak while you're in this fragile phase. Im not being a pessimist, I'm speaking on experience and Im sure many would agree. Deactivating my FB allowed me to heal tremendously.
knathema Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 Post breakup: Facebook = Devil. Unfriend her, block her or deactivate your fb all together. That site will bring you nothing but pain and further heartbreak while you're in this fragile phase. Im not being a pessimist, I'm speaking on experience and Im sure many would agree. Deactivating my FB allowed me to heal tremendously. totally agreed. Deactivate it for a while when you're healing, once you get better you can always reactivate it. It helps a lot.
Kilty Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 Yep - now you realise what it feels like you should know what to do. It's like the story of the little boy that goes to the Doctor and says my arm hurts when i poke it here. The Doctors reply - Well dont poke it ! Unfriending her or blocking her could provoke a reaction - doesnt matter you have to do it and your reasons are for doing it are clear however you dont tell her - in fact you dont even reply to any communications - unless its "i want to talk" - then its your decision whether you do that or not. She binned you remember - so NO CONTACT And as Jason kindly reminded us all. NC is not simply about not contacting your ex. It's having nothing to do with them, not asking about them, not looking at their FB page, avoiding "bumping into them" - nothing. Hard as it is to accept (you will still be in denial) they are not part of your life anymore and whatever they do is of no concern to you. If they are going to see other people they will and there is nothing you can do about it. You can only make it worse and push her further away. You have been warned - NO CONTACT
smudge21 Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 Remember how you feel right now, because once you've calmed down you will be tempted to look again. It's then you'll need to remember that by doing so you will be hurt and you will not learn anything that will make you feel better. Keep focusing on that pain and it will stop you looking, like it has me. Nothing good comes from stalking an ex...
neverendingdrama Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 She broke up with you ? Well stop torturing yourself and start being single. I know it is hard. I went through it. Took my now ex off before he was even an ex. After some abusive crap I found out he started seeing someone while still stringing me along. I saw his friends list and there she was. Contacted her and she removed herself as his friend and probably cut off contact. She's back . Got manipulated into his string of lies. To stop all temptation I just blocked him. He can't see me and I am not able to check him. It will avoid getting your heart yanked around for no reason. Some women love to play games like that.
Fufu Posted May 1, 2011 Posted May 1, 2011 Delete and/or block her from your facebook. People, be realistic. Don't hurt yourself by looking at their facebooks pages.
inthedeep Posted May 1, 2011 Posted May 1, 2011 My advice is to not even have a relationship status on facebook (except maybe if you're married- that's understandable). It adds so much unnecessary drama! She broke up with you, take your "in a relationship" off so you don't keep checking facebook every 2 hours to make sure she hasn't taken it off first. If it hurts, don't even put single. You can just take it off your profile all together. If she potentially contacts you upset you took it off, don't answer. She broke up with you! You don't need to explain anything. She is well aware yours still stays in a relationship, and that is part of helping her feel that she still has you in her pocket. Take it off.
ccnaboy2000 Posted May 1, 2011 Posted May 1, 2011 I looked at my exes facebook, and her latest post was "Such a perfect night )" I shouldnt have even went on. I feel like shi* now just wondering what she was doing. Any advice? I am so tempeted to contact her but I wont. She dumped me on sudsay by the way. This crap is mostly just a smokescreen. She knows you're looking at it and want's it to appear that everything is just fine with out you. Reality, things are not all well. Take it from a guy who's been through a few breakups. They all posted that crap shortly afte the breakup, but deep down inside they were as miserable about the decision as I was for a while. And ya, heed the advice, dont look at her facebook. For me I just temporarily deactivate my facebook whenever this sort of tradgedy happens for a month or so.
willpower Posted May 2, 2011 Posted May 2, 2011 Counter advice, look at it and feel the pain. Sooner or later you"ll get bored of hurting yourself and move forward. Then further on again you'll see her with another boy in a picture and you'll fell nothing at all - cos you'll be healed;) I'm 7 month in now, and I realise I'll always love her but I see pics of her with her guy and I'm neutral. I deactivated fb - it helped, but it also helped seeing her pictures and her moving on as it made me accept the reality. Stay NC, focus on moving on. My ex was awesome, way out of my league probably - I have searched since January for someone who can replace her and not come close. I'll keep searching. The pain was unbearable but I promise you this - I'm ok now. Time will heal you, you'll forget and the emotions will subside and you'll get back to normal. It's a swine in one hand as forgetting means it never went away it just got erased but it's how ppl are built, just like we ate built to feel love we're built to forget love too.
LoveDoesntHurt Posted May 2, 2011 Posted May 2, 2011 Could be a set up status...she probably wrote it cause she knew you would look on her page...i deleted my facebook acct months ago...me and my husband stayed into it abt facebook...post something on ur status..see if she reads it...act like it's nothing...heck u shoulda checked "like":laugh: I looked at my exes facebook, and her latest post was "Such a perfect night )" I shouldnt have even went on. I feel like shi* now just wondering what she was doing. Any advice? I am so tempeted to contact her but I wont. She dumped me on sudsay by the way.
bslchump Posted May 2, 2011 Posted May 2, 2011 Haha, I just had that spontaneous urge to look at my ex's. I'm glad I came to this thread first.
0hpenelope Posted May 2, 2011 Posted May 2, 2011 I looked at my exes facebook, and her latest post was "Such a perfect night )" I shouldnt have even went on. I feel like shi* now just wondering what she was doing. Any advice? I am so tempeted to contact her but I wont. She dumped me on sudsay by the way. Never, ever look at an ex's Facebook for a long, long time. Ever. That's my only advice. You look when you're 100% over them. Feeling like shi*? Is exactly why. Or you can keep looking too until you desensitize yourself. I see my ex's face on my Friends list and I'm just like when I see it pop up. Ha! Nope, haven't looked either. I get the urges, but I will never look at it. Not for a long time. Not until I'm over him. Either way, what do you think will work for you? We can parry around this Facebook thing all we want, but sometimes, curiosity is a very strong emotion. How much you let it control you, only you can decide.
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