9Lives Posted April 29, 2011 Posted April 29, 2011 It has been so long and I still think about my ex way too much. I know I should have been over it by now but Im not. I wish I was. I think Im not really progressing in my life because of it. I am trying so hard to get over it. I am. I just kept help but think about him. I cant help it. I still miss him more than I should. Im already doing the recommended stuff but it just dont seem to go away. Im feel bad about it.
knathema Posted April 29, 2011 Posted April 29, 2011 how long has it been since you went NC with him?
Fufu Posted April 29, 2011 Posted April 29, 2011 I still think of my ex alot, but I no longer feel that I need to be with him then I can be happy. Don't be too hard on yourself, you are always moving on when you believe in yourself.
smudge21 Posted April 29, 2011 Posted April 29, 2011 I'm with Fufu here - I still think about the ex every single day, but I know I'm moving on. I still have great regrets and often think about how things could've been, but she's no longer 'the one' in my mind. I know I will be happy without her, and I will love again. Don't beat yourself up over how long you think about an ex. It's different for everyone. There's no set time limit and anyone who tells you otherwise clearly has never experienced these feelings... and I feel sorry for them!
dressing up Posted April 29, 2011 Posted April 29, 2011 It has been so long and I still think about my ex way too much. I know I should have been over it by now but Im not. I wish I was. I think Im not really progressing in my life because of it. I am trying so hard to get over it. I am. I just kept help but think about him. I cant help it. I still miss him more than I should. Im already doing the recommended stuff but it just dont seem to go away. Im feel bad about it. Don't beat yourself up. You're not alone. I feel that toward my guy friend. But I have got over my other exes so I know it's a matter of time. That doesn't help all the time but take heart that we'll all get over something eventually. I'm so glad when I think of the exes I don't even think about and even when I think of them (not in a romantic way), I feel indifference. That's the best feeling. Okay, apart from falling in love. Hope you're already feeling better by the time you see this.
radiodarcy Posted April 29, 2011 Posted April 29, 2011 hey 9Lives, i'm with you. it's been 7 weeks of NC (had to re-start after i broke if back in february) and i still think about him what i would consider to be way too much. but i've also noticed that as time goes by, much of the negativity that used to plague me whenever i did think about him or talk to him has lifted. now - - when i think about him - - i don't get that burning knot of anxiety in the pit of my stomach like i used to - - wondering who he was with and what they're up to. i also didn't find myself constantly fighting those nagging feelings of not being good/interesting/pretty/special enough for him (he never said any of this to me but his rejection cause me to internalize those feelings just the same). i don't even really feel depressed like i was before - -and that's saying a lot because for the longest time i couldn't remember when i felt happy. these days, i'm finding i carry myself with more confidence. i can walk with my head held high instead of looking at the ground all the time. and i've even started saying "hello" to people around my neighborhood and in my office. sure i still think about him -- a lot. but instead of thinking abt him 24/7 it's more like - - 22/7 - - lol. not great - - but better than it was before. NC can make the time drag when you're trying to get over someone - - which makes it difficult to notice the signs of progress. but they are there. you've probably come farther than you realize
shocked_confused Posted April 29, 2011 Posted April 29, 2011 (edited) 9Lives, I think that's normal especially if you were with him a long time. It takes more than just a few months to get over someone who was very significant to you, and suddenly out of your life. So don't be so hard on yourself. Lol I should take my own advice because I sometimes feel the same way you do. I'm at 5.5 months NC from a 5.5 year relationship with a guy who needed to see "what else is out there", and I still think about him everyday so I get what your feeling. How long have you been broken up and NC? I bet you feel somewhat better than how you initially felt in the first few weeks of the breakup. It's just going to take a lot of time and eventually I think we'll notice that we aren't thinking about our exes half as much as we did. I'm planning several vacations with friends over the next year (first one starting in 2 days! yippeeeeeee ). I'm hoping my adventures will take my mind off him a great deal and get my old happy self back completely. Good luck, we'll get through this weird stage hopefully sooner rather than later Edited April 29, 2011 by shocked_confused
cerridwen Posted April 29, 2011 Posted April 29, 2011 (edited) No creeping his FB, right? I think you're putting in the WORK at getting over him, I really do. Have you adopted the habit of stopping any thought of him at the gate? Meaning, as soon as he pops into your head, you change the thought? Edited April 29, 2011 by cerridwen
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