suckerpunch Posted April 28, 2011 Posted April 28, 2011 hey, guys. i've been lurking on here for a bit and decided to ask you guys what my chances are with getting back with an ex. waste of time? or maybe we really are for each other? i'm kinda going crazy! i'll make it short and to the point so i don't bore you guys! so the girl i was with for roughly 4 years decided she wanted to finally call it quits 2 months ago because she felt we weren't going anywhere. we were technically broken up roughly 8 months ago but we still acted the same by talking, seeing, and doing everything we did just like we were for the 4 years. we were in love. while we were still a couple, we've talked about moving in together, spending the rest of our lives together, etc(normal love talk) but never ended up following through with any of it. so 2 months ago she told me she finally has to get over me and that crushed me completely. she said we couldn't talk or see each other until we were both over each other but begged me to stay as her friend. i was not having that so i basically told her i was done..but then i folded and tried the whole "begging" thing and that kinda pushed her away. she told me she was "kinda" dating someone and she needed to get over me. i did some reading and studying and started to reevaluate my lifestyle and the situation. couple weeks ago, i let her know that i agree with the break up and that i was moving on. i didn't hear from her for a few days and she ends up txting me to hang out. i folded(gotta stay strong damnit!!!) again and agreed to hang out but then she said it was a bad idea. she then told me the new guy she's dating asked her not to talk or see me because he feels threatened by me. then the next night, she emails and txts me saying that she needed me to comfort her cause she was having a really bad day and misses how i used to make her smile. she also told me that she thinks about me everyday and how she ended up thinking about the stuff we've done when hanging with her new date. it's obvious that she's in a rebound relationship? i truly love her to death and i know she feels the same way..except she's lost and confused. i'm doing the 100% NC starting today and staying strong. what do you guys think? do i have a chance on getting her back if i play it smart? i'm going crazy 'cause it seems like the complete opposite thing to do if you love someone(to not talk or see them). AHH!!! ps: sorry for the horrible grammar and punctuation!
Author suckerpunch Posted April 28, 2011 Author Posted April 28, 2011 and what should i do if she txts, emails or stops by my work? she's visited me at work by surprise a couple weeks ago. we both basically had the biggest smile when we saw each other. we went on lunch and then talked for a bit and that was it. very casual. do i stay strong and completely ignore her for a few weeks? or reply with a short answer? i want her to realize how much we miss each other, even though she's dating someone else. it's harder than it sounds! (as you guys know already)
Kilty Posted April 28, 2011 Posted April 28, 2011 She called it quits and she has went on to date someone else ! You should not be acting as her friend You should not be contacting her or replying to any contact from her. The only proviso is if she says she has made a mistake and wants to try again. Then you have to decide if thats what YOU want. And also whether you can get over her having been with someone else. Anything you do other than that will push her further away into the arms of her new man. See the tips below regarding no contact from Jason
VJohnson32 Posted April 28, 2011 Posted April 28, 2011 Ive been there buddy, she isnt coming back anytime soon. Dont want to say never since you never know. She is basically just dragging you along. She misses you but doesnt want to be with you. Feelings are there but no commitment, go figure. Its a cruel game of which you dont want any part of, trust me. The sooner you realize the better for you emotionally. You have been replaced like an old tire. Have some dignity and dont be there for her. She will call and text and throw sweet stuff your way but they dont mean squad. Disappear from her life and keep NC for yourself to get your head on straight. How old is she? Id assume 20-21?
Author suckerpunch Posted April 28, 2011 Author Posted April 28, 2011 she's 24. we have a dog together and told her i would find a place that will allow dogs when i move into a new place(prob in about a month). i told her this a couple weeks ago. right now the dog is at her parent's place(where she lives until she finds a place again). i'm so confused on what needs to be done.
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