Lilmisus Posted April 27, 2011 Posted April 27, 2011 I'm just curious, how long does it take for you guys to say that you've officially gotten over your ex? Right after the breakup, I read this article from one of my favorite websites, and just recently my mind was brought back to it when I started thinking about him The Frisky. The last time I cried was a week ago. The last time I felt anything towards him was on Easter, and that feeling was anger. The last time I saw him, was two days ago, and I felt nothing. I even told my friend that every time I saw him that day, that I just didn't care and didn't feel anything and she said "That's good, cause here he comes!" And sure enough..he did..and still nothing. Mornings have been the hardest for me, when I first wake up and I'm still in that state of being in between dreams and reality, and like usual, my mind always goes to him, as it has for the past year. Since the breakup, that's when it hurts the most. When I wake up thinking about his hugs and kisses, then am reminded of the truth. This morning though, I thought of him, and her, smiled, and just didn't care. My mind immediately went to the guy I'm crushing on, and then it went to what time it was, 10:05, and I jumped out of bed to get ready for class. Not giving him another thought for the next couple of hours. All day went like that...I would think of them..and feel nothing. Even when I saw that she was online today, and saw her status updates of how happy she was and all of this crap, I just didn't really care. I actually thought of how much her and I were alike, and how I wished we could be friends since we like a lot of the same things, instead of filled with bitterness and anger. I even thought of how she seemed to be everything he looked for in a girl. Someone who's innocent, pretty, long brown hair, smiles a lot, is fun to be around, and who likes the same things he does. Plus, it no longer matters to me when they started seeing each other - even if it was while we were together or not - and I'm just hoping that she treats him well now. Am I fooling myself into thinking that I'm over him? I feel like I'm in the middle of a hurricane right now, where I went through a lot of the pain, and now I'm in the middle of the eye of the hurricane, and before I know it, I'm going to be hit with even more pain, that's even stronger. Have others been through something like this before? Or have I made real, true, progress in getting over him in the month since the breakup? I just feel true happiness right now and I'm really hoping that this feeling doesn't end any time soon, since I've been looking forward to it.
Author Lilmisus Posted April 28, 2011 Author Posted April 28, 2011 were you the dumper or dumpee? I was dumped. He left me for her (pretty sure cheated on me with her, but wont admit it, of course), and she was my friend, and they both lied about it. And...we all work together. But, now, I just don't care anymore.
Movingthrough Posted April 28, 2011 Posted April 28, 2011 I was dumped. He left me for her (pretty sure cheated on me with her, but wont admit it, of course), and she was my friend, and they both lied about it. And...we all work together. But, now, I just don't care anymore. Mine was semi similar and i can say that i have been in the boat you are in, and its a good place. Its been quite a few months for me, and while i still think of her, its not as serious and my mind shifts when it does come up. I think a lot of what might be helping you is your "crush" like you said. Having a new focus makes a big difference, i can put money on the fact that if those two didnt have each other that they would feel horrible. That relationship wont last either with those two, trust me on that.
Author Lilmisus Posted April 28, 2011 Author Posted April 28, 2011 Mine was semi similar and i can say that i have been in the boat you are in, and its a good place. Its been quite a few months for me, and while i still think of her, its not as serious and my mind shifts when it does come up. I think a lot of what might be helping you is your "crush" like you said. Having a new focus makes a big difference I'm kind of worried that my crush is basically just a rebound for me, and just a distraction from the pain, and is only helping me mask it. I really don't want that to be true though, since I really like him and him and I would make a much better match than my ex and I made. i can put money on the fact that if those two didnt have each other that they would feel horrible. That relationship wont last either with those two, trust me on that. I honestly hope that their relationship does last. That she can help him open up his heart again and regain his faith in women and in love. He lost it a few years ago, and I wasn't able to help him like I tried to do (he said so even), so I'm really hoping that she makes the pain I've been going through worth it and doesn't hurt him in the least. But given the facts that she's been cheated on in the past, (probably) helped him cheat on me, and has already proven that she isn't trustworthy to anyone, then I don't think it will happen. But I truly hope it does.
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