ilovedhim Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 I'm just so sad. Yesterday and today have been hell for me. It was my ex birthday over the weekend, I didn't contact him at the advice of you guys on here. And he never attempted to contact me either in the past 2 weeks. Last night at a bar with friends I had to run to the bathroom to cry. And a very nice woman asked me if there was anything she could do for me. I was so drunk and miserable. When will this pain subside? At this point I just want to crawl in a hole forever.
Author ilovedhim Posted April 25, 2011 Author Posted April 25, 2011 Also I slept with someone 2 times so far but he's not taking my mind off my ex. Just makes me think of him even more.
Author ilovedhim Posted April 25, 2011 Author Posted April 25, 2011 How could he not care enough to apologize? Maybe he's not even thinking of me and here I am a total loser. I meant nothing to him for sure.
Scorpio6913 Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 Also I slept with someone 2 times so far but he's not taking my mind off my ex. Just makes me think of him even more. Unfortunately when you really loved someone then do this, it ususlly makes you feel worse, that's why I stopped sleeping with other women so soon following a break up since I was in my twenties.. I think you need time to yourself to really heal. You will heal!
LoveTNT Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 been there done that. The best advice, no drinking until you feel you're further down the road with the healing process. I did that for the first 2 months and I couldn't take it anymore. So I stopped drinking for a bit. i continued to go to work and go to school, yes I had my bathroom breaks for tears sometimes but that's ok, it's a part of it all. It will get better, TRUST me! that's only if you don't revert back to any self-sabotaging themes. Keep your head up. Trust me, I know this, if you look back to my old post you'll see, haha. You'll blossom through all this, if you just let yourself. peace and Love.
Author ilovedhim Posted April 25, 2011 Author Posted April 25, 2011 No sex or alcohol? I'm trying to concentrate on work but it sems to be getting worse
hearttopieces Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 I feel your pain... I really do. Usually I do the crying part on my way to work - public transport in huge sunglasses. I guess nobody can see and hear anything, but to be honest I don't really care. Yesterday I noticed, another girl was quietly crying. Made me think, it was kinda sad and funny at the same time. Anyway, I can understand the alcohol part, but sex with someone else? I can't even look at anybody right now. But yeah, I do understand the alcohol part.
Author ilovedhim Posted April 25, 2011 Author Posted April 25, 2011 Thanks. Glad to know I'm not a lunatic for crying everywhere. Is contacting a relative considered breaking NC? I need to know he's thinking about me.
Leda Posted April 26, 2011 Posted April 26, 2011 It helped me in the stage where I was just crying all the time, like the weeping equivalent of post-nasal drip, to cut out sex and alcohol. I thought the sex and drinking might help, but it didn't. Celibacy sucks, but the icky feeling of sleeping with my friend (when I am in love with another guy) and hurting him sucks harder. (The sex felt good--it was the 'ewwww you're not my ex' weepy aftermath that was not fun.) And alcohol is a depressant, although it's not always noticable as such until the next morning. How could he not care enough to apologize? Maybe he's not even thinking of me and here I am a total loser. I meant nothing to him for sure. In my case--and I'm unfortunately not healed yet, and it's been like 800 years--the dirty pain of ego and self-esteem issues got all mixed up with the clean pain of loving and missing him. It helps me to try to separate out the two. I am sorry you're going through this.
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