Anna86 Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 Hey guys, I hope you are all having a good week! I have been having some problems. So basically, broke up with ex of 2 years over three months ago. Went through all the stages, denial, shock, sadness, anger...but now I am stuck in sadness!! It feels like depression. Honestly, I am losing interest in everything and just feel so glum. I thought I was moving on up as I had a burst of joy last week but for over a week now I have been depressed and there is nothing that is helping! So, I have a good social life. I am keeping busy. I live very far away from my close friends and family so that has made this time hard. But, I have managed to make new friends here. This weekend I was so busy but I felt so down! I met many people, but the guys I met just made me more depressed. I feel under pressure to find someone. I am so scared my ex is with someone and I feel I will cope better if I am with a really kind, caring awesome man! I just miss being close with a guy and feeling my heart beat faster around them. Last night, I had a dream about my ex. He was with someone new. I woke up feeling sick. This girl was so beautiful , pure and looked like a model. She seemed so happy and I felt like she had everything I wanted. I am sure this dream is symbolic. So, I felt so low today. I know it was just a dream but I felt like I experienced it. I am so unsure of everything in my life now in general. I am not sure if I am unhappy with my life in general? Or is it the break up making me feel this way? I want to do something radical and new and fresh! But am worried I have problems I need to deal with and that I am just trying to escape.... Sorry for ranting, but I really am unsure of everything right now. Is this normal after a break up?
happiness0421 Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 I'm sort of going through your situation now, although it was with someone I dated for only 3.5 months. However, he was the first person I'd ever been with that I actually saw myself having a future with. Blah. For me, it feels almost as though I need to find someone else to be with. It is so weird to go from being with someone for so long to having no attachments; no strings (I have been in a relationship for basically the past 9 years of my life with 3 guys [not simultaneously; lol!]). Even though you may think of yourself as a happy, stable person that has a lot going for them, it is very weird to no longer have that other person by your side. My initial reaction was to start thinking of ways to get a new guy ASAP. But then I had to take a step back and ask myself why I felt the need to fill this void so quickly. There is obviously a void; why else would I put so much pressure on myself to find someone else so soon? As hard as it is, I realized that I need to focus on myself and what makes me happy, and let the right guy come along when it is 'time'. It sounds really sucky and cliche, but it is so true! But don't forget how to flirt - even a look and a smile can go a long way in a guy's eyes! Good luck with everything - you'll get through it, because we all deserve the best.
happiness0421 Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 Oh P.S. - I know what you mean about the dreams. Those are the worst, because you wake up thinking about your ex even though you try to not think about them too often. I find that the best thing (for me) is to not lie in bed and reminice/feel pity for myself - no matter what time it is, I get up and go for a long walk with my dog. Refreshes my brain, brings me back to reality, and I get some fresh air. Even if you don't have a pup, just getting up and going for a nice walk/jog is very helpful!
Fufu Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 Cheer up, give you a big hug I don't know if I'm weird, I actually think of my ex bf has a new gf and by thinking this, I told myself, "I wouldn't want to become a third party or to love a guy who is attached already." You can start waking up in the morning, look at yourself in the morning and tell yourself, "Every day is better than yesterday."
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