HoldYourBreath Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 I am sorry but I am just going to vent right now :/ He broke up with me because he suffers from depression but he still loves me. He broke up with me because he is mentally unstable and doesn't think he can make me happy if he is not happy. .He broke up with me once before for the same reason but we got back together the day after, it's been almost two weeks since the current break-up. I thought I was over him, but the other day in town we walked past each other and ignored each other. After that I sent him a text saying 'wow that was harder than expected' and he replied ' I just broke down x' He has asked me for space, but I can't stop texting him and worrying about him. And I know that makes me so selfish because he asks me to do that one thing and I am struggling to do it. And what is going to be hard is that he still wants me to go to his play. I love him so much and I want to be there for him and help him and I cry every night because I feel so crap about this. I just want him to get better. And if that means no contact with him, I guess I will have to do it. I think it would be easier if he didn't have feelings for me because then I could move on, but I don't know where I stand right now. And he said he would give me a heads up when he is ready to talk about things but I am so scared he will forget about me and find someone else. And that's me being selfish again and it's so stupid because we were only together for a short amount of time and I really shouldn't be so attached and in love but I am. Sigh, things are never easy!!!
Fufu Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 Don't have to say sorry, we are all here for one another. When they want space, give them what they want. He had chosen to leave, despite the reasons. However, no matter what kind of reasons he gave for breaking up. The reality is still the same, he doesn't want you to be in his life anymore. No one will ever know about future, he may come back, he may not.. Therefore, you have to move on, don't wait around for anything or for anyone because you just will never know what will happen. Live your life to the fullest. I hope you seek NC as soon as possible.
happiness0421 Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 Sigh...this sucks. I know because I went thru the same crap, in a way. He broke up with me because 'he couldn't trust me to not hurt him'...emotional/trust issues, etc. You probably don't want to hear this, but Fufu is right. You have to move on. Because part of what he was telling you was probably the truth - if he is not happy, he will not be able to make you happy, even if it seemed like he could at the time you were together. Looking back in my relationship, I realized that every time I would get even just mildly annoyed over something, my ex would get very down on himself and apologize profusely/do anything to fix it. He was always afraid that he was letting me down...I think that led to our demise. But you know what? Why would you want to be with someone who has all of these issues in the first place? Of course you care about them, and even still love them, but the fact is that if he were truly ready for a relationship and truly wanted to be with you, he would not have broken up with you in the first place. It may have been hard to talk to you about his feelings, and it may have been scary, but if he was ready for a serious relationship then he would've been able to handle that. But he couldn't. Best thing for you, my dear, is to move on to the best of your abilities. Who knows...you may end up meeting someone much more stable...and better for you! It is very hard in the meantime, I know because I am there right now. Keep yourself busy and journal every day; that's what I do. Best ~~
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