I just keep thinking about it ..is experience everything?

[Hp1991]

I have several issues going on with me . I can't seem to sit down and get an answer out of myself . I just keep going in a circle and losing the ability to keep thinking about it and its honestly tearing me apart. I'll post the topics separately so I can get a clear answer for each one.

 

 

Firstly, I'm in a relationship (19) with a 28year old. I don't want to hear the drama for our age difference. The issue with us is that hes very experienced..

Okay, fine. That was all fine with me at the start but then now I'm feeling very insecure. I guess alot of things add up to this and each thing takes it to another level of feeling upset. He has about 10years of experience literally.. whereas I've just started off . I don't know how to take this in calmly and productively.. I feel not at par with him at all, I don't know what I'm doing half of the time whereas he can simply go ahead with anything and suggest things to me . I feel like at a disadvantage all of the time . I don't know what I'm doing . I don't want to venture out and try new things because it may look like i'm awkward. He's got the 10 years behind him and also the 4 girls he was doing that with. I think of how he would've been with them and I just go off the walls thinking I'm not good enough. All of my issues that I'm going to post are all related to one another. I don't feel like I'm good enough to be with him even if I don't know who he's been with. I look around and see other girls and think he'd be better off with them . Maybe my biggest blow would be that I asked him if I made him horny and he said not really. He isn't a horrible guy at all . He's amazing and nice to me ...everything I would ever want in a guy . I beleive when he answered my question he spoke without thinking and i'd rather the truth than some cover up. So basically I don't make him excited , what's getting him off then ?

 

I don't know how great his ex's have been in bed and it gets me each and everytime I think about it ...He's probably had way more fun with them , I don't make him excited therefore he's probably more turned on with any other girl he's been with.

 

I honestly feel sick and disgusted with myself for my lack of confidence. I think about what his past couldve been and gag. How I don't make him horny ... then why are we having sex? I can't get past any of this. I don't even know what question I'm asking anymore.

 

I guess in my perspective is experience everything? I feel very disadvantaged like a worker whose been working for 10year compared to a first day newbie. Obviously who do you think knows more? therefore how am I supposed to help "him"?

 

Also how do i get rid of these thoughts about his past . I've never done the deed with anyone else and it always gets me in the gut thinking about him and his ex's

[OliveOyl]

Maybe my biggest blow would be that I asked him if I made him horny and he said not really.

 

I can ignore everything else you've said in your post, but this would be a deal-breaker. I think you should move on.