aftermath Posted April 23, 2011 Posted April 23, 2011 My boyfriend of 9 years snapped on me earlier this week and is now giving me the silent treatment for the past week although he has come by my place once to pick up stuff I was holding for him. He won't return my texts or calls so I have stopped trying. He has been very irritable and stressed lately. Every small little thing sets him off that I often wouldnt say anything so that I wouldn't rock the boat. I don't know why his "mood" has been so on edge and it is like I am dealing with two people (no he is not bipolar) at times. He has never been like this before and the days leading up to this blow up he would pick on me and criticize me every chance he got. His behavior was like going 150 miles per hour in every direction in a circle. I feel hurt that he won't talk to me or talk this out and it is killing me slowly. I am tempted to text him but I've been reading no contact is the way to go. ANy advice on his moodiness or advice if I should continue refraining from bothering him?
dreamingoftigers Posted April 23, 2011 Posted April 23, 2011 Just let him have his space for a little bit. What happened?
Fufu Posted April 23, 2011 Posted April 23, 2011 Best is to give him some space... Perhaps he's very stressed over something.
Author aftermath Posted April 23, 2011 Author Posted April 23, 2011 I really do not know myself, we were cooking dinner and I accidentally knocked over a glass. I was like oh crap I spilled stuff all over and made a mess. He got so irritated and snapped at me telling me to F*** OFF and walked out. He has been giving me the silent treatment since. He's been like this lately...anything will set him off. We've been together a long time and he has never acted like this before or gone this long being mad about anything either. I'm at a lost what it could be. One of my friends said substance abuse. i don't know.
dreamingoftigers Posted April 23, 2011 Posted April 23, 2011 Look up the 180 on Divorce Busters. I know that you guys aren't married but a lot of the tips might really really help right now for you to sort through things because he's in the wind right now.
sonic3 Posted April 23, 2011 Posted April 23, 2011 Ignore him until he wises up, then he will likely come crawling back.
lovnlost Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 The ignoring is a form of stonewalling and allows one to be in a state of control within the relationship or post relationship at times. Its a horrible thing to do to one you love, however, many are not aware of what the effects are of such treatment. The erratic behavior, in my personal opinion only, is that of one who may be seeing someone else. My ex girlfriend did it to her ex before they separated. I was the reason behind it. She treated him as he is treating you. Its mere speculation, but would explain a lot. PLEASE dont over read what I am saying....only a thought and given MY CIRCUMSTANCE only, it fits. Best of luck...ignore him if you can. That will give you some control back and let him come to you in peace. At this point it seems that may be a case where every step you take forward, he is taking two steps back. My ex did it to me.
bboy Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 Stonewall someone without giving any explanation? It is just about as stupid as going "NC" without telling why. Behavior equivalent of a three year old and completely irresponsible.
Sooner or Later Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 I broke up with someone (we were together five years) who used to resort to the silent treatment when we fought. I told him multiple times not to do this; he didn't listen. I gave him a warning that if he did this again, I would leave him...and I did. He begged for me to come back, but I was done. I would not contact him and seriously consider if you wish to continue this relationship with a man who reacts in an immature and emotionally abusive manner when dealing with stress/conflict.
makelemonade1974 Posted April 25, 2011 Posted April 25, 2011 The silent treatment is emotional abuse: http://abuse101.com/silenttreatmentandabuse.html Get away from this guy. Run. There's worse around the next corner.
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