fortyninethousand322 Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 The other day in class my professor and I got into a debate over subject matter. It was during a class discussion and she meant to purposely push the debate so it wasn’t like I was just being mean or a facetious class clown or anything. But, I realized that I was attracted to her. Not physically (I mean yeah sure she’s cute) but intellectually. Now, I’m not turning into “he who shall not be named” who goes on emailing his teacher every five minutes, but this is the kind of girl I’m interested in. Looking back at the last few girls I’ve gone on dates with they were all intellectual types. I even changed my mind about girls I wasn’t physically attracted to previously once I found out they were intellectual. It’s like a fetish I have. It’s almost as if it’s the first thing I look for, not looks, but smarts. It’s like I’m not even driven to pursue a girl unless I think she’s smart (in a very specific way). Until the other day I didn’t even realize I was doing this. Don’t get me wrong I have a sex drive just like anyone else, but for some reason I don’t get sexually attracted to someone based on their looks. I’ve also realized this is exactly why I don’t escalate things when I’m on a date. I get so caught up in the conversation that I never do anything physical; it just completely slips my mind, and then presumably the girl loses interest and it’s over. Now, I’m not a complete egg head, I love sports and stuff normal people consider fun too, but this seems to be the unfortunate situation I have found myself in. I feel like if I could somehow undo this, I’d have a whole lot better luck finding dates and whatnot. Is this even normal? Or am I just a complete egg head who has just now figured this out?
NoMagicBullet Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Now, I’m not turning into “he who shall not be named” who goes on emailing his teacher every five minutes, but this is the kind of girl I’m interested in. LOL! And we are very grateful that you aren't. Nothing wrong with needing to be intellectually attracted to a person. Attraction is different for everyone, and for some men and women, being able to have an intellectual discussion or debate is very important. A female friend of mine is like this. (She's single, I wonder if you two would hit it off....)
Kamille Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I’ve also realized this is exactly why I don’t escalate things when I’m on a date. I get so caught up in the conversation that I never do anything physical; it just completely slips my mind, and then presumably the girl loses interest and it’s over. Now, I’m not a complete egg head, I love sports and stuff normal people consider fun too, but this seems to be the unfortunate situation I have found myself in. I feel like if I could somehow undo this, I’d have a whole lot better luck finding dates and whatnot. I'd say you're pretty normal. Vivacious conversation can be such a aphrodisiac. Do you "flirt" intellectually while on dates? I had an ex who was an expert at using intelligence to his increases his sex appeal.
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