PIM Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 So I met this girl online and we've been dating about 6-7 months now. It's the longest relationship I've ever had and it's mostly because she's a wonderful girl. Caring, affectionate, sweet, great laugh/sense of humor and etc... I like hanging out with her but I don't know something is missing. I've never really felt like I was dying to see her and she has been complaining I don't reach out to her enough. Over the past couple of months I've been thinking about breaking up with her but really she has done nothing wrong. Really it's just that I'm curious about dating other women (no one in particular and I never want to cheat on her) and I believe for the most part it's cause my physical attraction to her is waning. It's such a shallow reason I know but I think about how it might be a big mistake to let go of someone just because of this or how this is only gonna get worse over time and cause a breakup further down the road. I care for her and I know she wants to have a family in the not too distant future and I don't want to be that guy she wasted years on. I'm at a loss on what I should do. Any advice would be appreciated...
NoMagicBullet Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Sounds like the honeymoon phase has worn off. You're not attracted to her anymore, you want to date other people, you've been thinking about breaking up with her... it's time to break up. Maybe she still "looks good on paper" so to speak, but your heart isn't in this relationship and nothing good will come of staying in it, not for either of you.
D-Lish Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I agree, it's time to move on. Given that you said she's a great girl, don't string her along because it's not fair to her to keep her on the hook.
Author PIM Posted April 24, 2011 Author Posted April 24, 2011 Well the thing is I do still like hanging around her and we have a great time together and I wonder if as someone said before it's just the honeymoon period is over and maybe it's just settling in? I guess I'm wondering in a healthy relationship doesn't the fire fade at some point, in other words this will happen in every relationship? So if that's true I sometimes wonder if the rest of it, affection, caring and etc... are the most important things?(God, I know that sounds really lame...) Then again my more cynical side asks if I'm settling because it's nice to have a cute enough girl that thinks you're sexy and funny. Also there is the fact of how impossibly annoying/difficult dating can be...
Professor X Posted April 24, 2011 Posted April 24, 2011 Well the thing is I do still like hanging around her and we have a great time together and I wonder if as someone said before it's just the honeymoon period is over and maybe it's just settling in? I guess I'm wondering in a healthy relationship doesn't the fire fade at some point, in other words this will happen in every relationship? So if that's true I sometimes wonder if the rest of it, affection, caring and etc... are the most important things?(God, I know that sounds really lame...) Then again my more cynical side asks if I'm settling because it's nice to have a cute enough girl that thinks you're sexy and funny. Also there is the fact of how impossibly annoying/difficult dating can be... Fear should never determine your life. That being said, you should know that you are in the "settling in" phase now. The fire does fade out eventually, in every RS and it is up to the two of you now to keep that fire alive. You should now think with yourself if she's the one for you. Where do you see yourself in 5 years from now? with her? if the answer is yes, than you need to go chop some wood and reignite the fire between the 2 of you. If you can't see yourself with her, than it's time to say good-bye. No-one other than you can really answer this question.
Recommended Posts