thompscs Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 (edited) Please give me some feedback on this letter from my ex gf below. Let me be clear, I am the one who ended the relationship and broke her heart and I've been trying to get her back for a year. She seems responsive to gifts and opens the communication briefly after and then shuts it back off. I love this girl. She is the one. She is with another guy right now and I am walking a fine line of trying to stay in touch vs being annoying to her. But I just don't want her to walk into another man's arms forever. I've tried everything. What can I do? She continues to stay in touch with me on these occasions when I send gifts even though she continues to say "goodbye and don't contact me again" all the time. I thought about writing a poem to her down the road when she is less pissed off. I've already written and framed the damn thing. I'm just waiting for the right timing to let her breathe and hoping this relationship with this dude ends. Anyway read the letter below and let me know what you all think. Thanks. For over a year you’ve e-mailed and left me messages asking me to at least talk with you. I finally agreed to because I thought it would be good for us to clear things up. I wanted you to understand my current situation and you obviously had some things you wanted to tell me for a while. After we talked I was glad we did. I was happy to hear you’ve made some positive changes in your life. You also said you understand that I’m in a relationship and can’t be your friend. You said you would respect that. Then you sent me a few e-mails after our talk saying you still have feelings for me and want to go on a date. It was never my intention to give you hope or expectations that we can be friends or anything more in the future. It was cool to reminisce, but the good and bad times we shared are in the past. It’s not a case of bad timing. It’s just that we aren’t a good match for one another on any level. We’ve both tried and it’s never worked. I can’t try anymore. I’ve moved on with my life. You don’t need to try harder or prove yourself to me. I just want you to let me go for good. I promise that once you do that, you will find the right woman who’s going to love you and appreciate all the love you have to give. I want to be completely clear about this so there’s no confusion. I can’t ever be friends with you. I don’t want you to contact me ever again. I’ve said this to you many times before and you’ve ignored my wishes. I have always meant it and I mean it now. Please respect my feelings and right to move on with my life. I’ve done that for you and I deserve the same. Goodbye. Edited April 22, 2011 by thompscs
TaraMaiden Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Good for her. Straight, up-front, no-nonsense, polite, sensitive, unambiguous and frank. She's responded in exactly the right way, and it's time for you to accept that. Enough already. If you have one grain of respect for her, and any dignity and self-worth for you - do exactly as she requests. Get the message, and move on. There's nothing more to see here.
hunk Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Be thankful she sent you such a straight forward and honest email. As Tara said, no more to see. She's said absolutely everything you need to hear
Author thompscs Posted April 23, 2011 Author Posted April 23, 2011 I do respect her a bunch and we really don't talk often and I never call her. As you all know it's just hard to let go. I just get confused cause she stops contact and then when I do reach out every now and then on special occasions like her birthday, she'll talk and sometimes even say things like maybe we can talk at some point and that I am so sweet. I've been dating other people and am having fun with it but I do miss her. She is a good girl. I made my bed so I have to lie in it and deal with it.
TaraMaiden Posted April 23, 2011 Posted April 23, 2011 She replies because it's polite. Your mission - should you decide to accept it - is to STOP REACHING OUT TO HER!! She doesn't want you to...! She's told you in absolute, certain terms, that it's got - to - stop! so - stop. Quit. Finish. End. Please, please - get it. This message will self destruct in 5 seconds.
Johnny85 Posted April 23, 2011 Posted April 23, 2011 Tara is absolutely right - you need to know when to let go; now is definitely the right time. There is no room for misunderstanding in this letter. She has moved on and you should accept her decision.
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