love is dangerous Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 its better to have loved and lost then not loved at all. i d rather not love then have to experience it then lose it , the pain of a broken heart is just to much. what do you guys think , would you still have want it knowing you would go through this in the end.
J0N Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 I agree with the saying. However this is something that a person would say after they have gotten over somebody. If I could go into my past relationship knowing the outcome from day one, I still would have done it.
Shadowburn Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 There are a lot of pretty sayings out there that are meaningless from the point of day-to-day living and all practicalities. If I knew what I know now about my ex and how our love story would end, I'd run in opposite direction. 8 months after break up, and I am still struggling, same as many others on this board. Who would call this devastation "love"?
PelicanPete Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 (edited) All things come to an end, even love. Whether it be through death or earlier, it is one of the things that make us realize we are human. Although sometimes I wish I never dated my ex, I'm glad I fell in love with her. Even though she completely annihilated my feelings on the way out, it made me analyze my life and things only improved from there. In life there are ups and downs, and I know one day I'll be dead. Whatever happens after that I'm ok with, I'd just be glad to experience life. Just because life is going to end one day, doesn't make me wish I was never born. Edited April 21, 2011 by PelicanPete
FlyAway&ComeBack Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 I would still do it all over again. It is the best feeling in the world.. The worst.. It's everything. Just thinking about it gives me chills. Then I realize how young love (beginnings of the relationship) is really how we should always love one another... I don't want to be 45 years old and have that spark gone from my marriage.. I want to enjoy every second I can with my other half.. I should have. Thinking back on it now. I would have done things so much different. It's hard not to blame yourself for the mistakes in the relationship. Especially if you're the one getting dumped. (Sorry for the rambling, my answer is in bold)
dreamingoftigers Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 I would rather have never have loved at all I think.
Lil1 Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 As much as heartbreak sucks thelife out of you I would never want to go through life not experiencing real love. I can't wait to fall in love and feel the butterflies all over again!
Author love is dangerous Posted April 22, 2011 Author Posted April 22, 2011 As much as heartbreak sucks thelife out of you I would never want to go through life not experiencing real love. I can't wait to fall in love and feel the butterflies all over again! but i think there a difference between having loved and not lost and never experiencing it, im talking about having loved and losing it i would rather not . i would love to love just not to have to go through the heratbreak of losing it in return for that experience.
BlindRage Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I agree with you. I wish I would have never fallen in love in the first place. I used to be happy and excited about everything, now I'm just bitter and depressed.
hellon Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Is ignorance really bliss? The feeling of loss is sometimes unbearable, but I still don't think I'd choose not to do it all over again. Too bad I can't just do it all over again, and get it right the second time around...
stopthemadness Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 its better to have loved and lost then not loved at all. i d rather not love then have to experience it then lose it , the pain of a broken heart is just to much. what do you guys think , would you still have want it knowing you would go through this in the end. Id have to say YES, i would have rather Loved and lost then to have never loved at all. Yes breakups hurt but in time you do get over them. Time has a way of healing so just give it time..Ive been through a divorce. Its was along time ago and OMG it hurt, but time healed my broken heart weather i wanted it to or not. And time will heal your brokenheart too. Just keep no contact. This last bearkup took me sooo long to get over because i kept in contact with my ex for a while DUMB DUMB! But Ive been N/C for 92 days (had to count) and am healing now. Hang in there!! it gets better...
SleeplessRomantic Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Would I go back to 2008 and redo my relationship all over again? Absolutely, given everything that I know now and how I'm much more aware and wise (at least I'd like to think so) compared to then. However, 'true' life lessons involve some kind of pain. All of these experiences must be learned through life's many adventures. Trials and tribulations. What's the fun in spending every day inside a house, avoiding social contact and doing nothing productive only to avoid being 'hurt'. You are going to get hurt in life. You must channel your own body's defense mechanisms. In this case, when you feel heartbreak, you feel it because you must figure out a way to heal. Relax, take your time and make new memories by doing things you've always thought about doing but never have -- you only live once. Again, I'd definitely go back to the year 2008 (in my case), but as of today there's no time machine, so the only kind of natural movement is forward.
broken-and-lost Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I've had my heart broken 3 times and it hurts like hell every time always for different reasons you learn one lesson only to be taught another would i like to change it hell yes would i have never wanted to meet the people i fell in love with no, i wish i could change the last one more then anything but i would have never not wanted to meet her even tho it hurts like hell
radiodarcy Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 its better to have loved and lost then not loved at all. i d rather not love then have to experience it then lose it , the pain of a broken heart is just to much. what do you guys think , would you still have want it knowing you would go through this in the end. ah yes, i am familiar with this saying. and i agree with you - - it's a load of bunk. had i known that i was going to turn into a bitter, wretch of a human being i *never* would have allowed him to sucker me in. i suppose if it hadn't happened with him it would have been someone else. as it is i'd rather live my life as a recluse than run the risk of falling in love only to be hurt - - again. it's just too painful.
cali.man Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 (edited) I rather have loved .... You only grow as a person. Just broke up with my gf/fiance of about 5 years. But now i know what to bring to the next relationship... Yes it sucka but what doesnt kill only makes us stronger! It sucks but cant dread on that break up forever! We all need to move on and look at ourselves first take care of ourselves first!!! Edited April 22, 2011 by cali.man
Nikki Sahagin Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Well....some of the better memories are great memories. In those moments, I was truly happy. Who's to say we would really have been happier without them? I don't know. All I do know is that life is full of ups and downs, gains and loses. Perhaps it is true that you can't appreciate your gains if you never experience a loss or enjoy your ups if there is never a down around the corner. I guess I'm happy that I loved...but sometimes very confused about why *I* had to lose...
Yumisekai Posted April 30, 2011 Posted April 30, 2011 You need to listen to one thing. Love is something many people are illusioned of. They think when they fall in love, they see the other person as special and don't care about any other person as much as the loved one. Ignorant bastards. We, as human beings, are connected to everyone in one way or another. If it hurts losing someone, get over with it. There are 6 billion human beings to choose from. It's at your expense by feeling depressed and sad. Stop putting that protective shield on you. Imagine the burden of a friend trying to relieve you and you keep being depressed because you want so. Instead of wasting time crying your face for the lost one, arrange a new opportunity to meet new people by stabilizing a connection between them. Since you're already connected to them, you don't have to feel bad because you will always have someone to talk to. There are people around the world that would love talking with you if they knew you were around. Since when people say that love is dangerous? What the hell is that supposed to mean? It's dangerous becuase, again, you want so. If you want to be alone all day, it's because you want so. If you want to die alone, it's because you want so. If you have a broken heart, it's because you want so. If you let other people affect your well-being, you're a weakling. Get over with old relationships and start making the life of the person on the other side of the world worth it.
nyc_guy2003 Posted May 1, 2011 Posted May 1, 2011 I've had multiple loves (or what I thought were loves) and associated losses (which were definitely real losses). Some of the losses hurt so bad that a) my brother once accused me of ruining Christmas because I had a huge frown in all of the family pictures and b) my dad had to write me a letter to tell me about all the times he went through such pain and how he got over them. But if I had to do it all over again I would gladly take all the suffering. Why? Because they molded me into the person I am today, and turned me into the person that eventually found my real one-and-only love and we've been happily married going on 4 years.
happiness0421 Posted May 1, 2011 Posted May 1, 2011 I actually totally agree with this cliche saying. You know why? Because of another cliche saying: "Never regret something that at some point made you smile." I was very happy with my ex, up until the point of the breakup. And as much as the hurt sucked, I would never trade a day that I had with him. I learned SO much (good & bad), and I will take all of that into my next relationship to hopefully make it the best one yet. You have to take a huge risk when you begin a relationship, but I think the risk is totally worth the happiness and amazing feelings that you can have with someone who you truly love and care about. You'll have that love again, hopefully for good next time!!
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